Give a Day. Get a Disney Day. 2010 full script

Give a Day. Get a Disney Day.

Directed by: Stephen J. Anderson, Byron Howard
Produced by: Roy Conli, John Lasseter, Glen Keane
Screenplay by: Dan Fogelman
Based on: The Frog Princess by E. D. Baker, The Frog Prince by Brothers Grimm
Starring: Mae Whitman, Steve Whitmire, Kristin Chenoweth, Bruno Campos, Eric Jacobson, Raven-Symoné, Keith David, Lucy Liu, Dave Goelz, Danny DeVito, Bill Barretta, America Ferrera, Michael-Leon Wooley, David Rudman, Jane Horrocks, Miley Cyrus, Matt Vogel, Jesse McCartney, Peter Linz, Jennifer Cody, Pamela Adlon, Jim Cummings, Jeff Bennett, Rob Paulsen, Peter Bartlett, Jenifer Lewis, Anjelica Huston, Lauren Graham, John Krasinski, John Goodman, Grey DeLisle, Kari Wahlgren, Jocelyn Blue, Charity James, June Melby, Catherine Reitman, Colleen Wainwright, Dorian Harewood, Joey Camen, T.K. Carter, Darnell Suttles, Steve Kehela, Loreena McKennitt, Steve Valentine, Kathy Najimy, Richard Portnow, Gail Borges, Bonnie Hunt, Raymond Ochoa, Matthew Josten, Sammi Hanratty, Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Muggsy Bogues, Larry Johnson, Shawn Bradley, Ava Acres, Breanna Brooks, Ritchie Montgomery, Don Hall, Paul Briggs, Michael Colyar, Emeril Lagasse, Kevin Michael Richardson, Randy Newman, America Young, Kat Cressida, Ahmad Rashad, Daran Norris, John DiMaggio, Corey Burton, Nolan North, Brian Stepanek, Roger Craig Smith, Danielle Mone Truitt, Bob Bergen
Music by: Randy Newman, Thomas Newman, Michael Giacchino, Alan Menken, James Newton Howard, Joel McNeely, John Debney, Danny Elfman
Edited by: Tim Mertens
Production company: Walt Disney Pictures, Walt Disney Animation Studios, Disney Fairies, Jim Henson Productions
Distributed by: Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures
Release dates: May 26, 2010 (Disneyland Resort), June 25, 2010 (United States)
DVD/Blu-Ray release date: November 9, 2010
Running time: 104 minutes
Country: United States
Language: English
Budget: $200 million
Box office: $1.063 billion
MPAA Rating: G: "General Audiences-All Ages Admitted."
Rotten Tomatoes: Critic Score: 98% Certified Fresh. Average Rating: 8.7/10. Reviews Counted: 239. Fresh: 236. Rotten: 3. Critics Consensus: Magically charming and dazzlingly old-fashioned, Give a Day. Get a Disney Day. is a sweet, simple story which offers boasting mix of slam-dunking basketball treat and a nostalgic warmth of traditional Disney animation with witty dialogue, catchy songs, intergalactic colors, and a sprinkle of pixie dust to delight the all-age Muppet and Disney Fairies fans for the Disney vacation.
CinemaScore Grade: A-
Aspect Ratio: 1.78:1
English Subtitles SDH: (YELLOW)

(On a night sky background, we see a star, a la Pinocchio. Then, some clouds appear, a la Mary Poppins, and a pirate ship, a la Peter Pan. We then see the castle, a la Cinderella, done in CGI, while different fireworks are appearing. A circular line is drawn over the castle (in the same vein as the previous logo), then the castle enters many dots from the bottom of the screen to reveal "WALT DiSNEY", in the post-1979 Disney script logo font, albeit slightly revised. "PICTURES" fades in, while the circular line is nearly staying visible on the logo)
(A gold paper flips in the logo onto screen, drawing a red outline of Mickey Mouse wearing a steamboat hat. The paper finishes flipping as an outline of Mickey turns into a scene from the 1928 Disney cartoon Steamboat Willie, and the animation zooms to the "0" and continues there, while the big text "50TH ANIMATED MOTION PICTURE" appears under the logo, with "WALT DiSNEY ANIMATION STUDIOS" fading in above it)
(On a black background, a blue laser carves out a line across the screen. The line flips towards the screen, revealing a blue outline of Kermit the Frog, who is then filled with color from left to right. Kermit shines brightly, then he is swallowed by a dot of light that dances across the screen, which from left to right sweeps out the words. The television logo would either be still or it would have the dot for the i flying on top of the text: Jim Henson PICTURES then flies back to the logo to dot the "I".)
(The narrator stood on the balcony of her royal apartment, which commanded one of the best views of Pixie Anaheim. Her eyes seemed to rest on the magical landscape before her, but she was thinking about a place very far away)
(The narrator was picturing the mainland, where the humans lived, and where spring had yet to appear)
NARRATOR: Have you ever wondered how nature gets its glow? Who gives it light and color as the seasons come and go?
(In Pixie Anaheim and other cities, it was fall, winter, spring, and summer all year round–and all at the same time. Each season occupied a corner of the magical realm of the fairies. It was only on the mainland that one season followed another, each waiting–sometimes patiently and sometimes not–for its turn)
Narrator: Who helps all creatures, great and small, to walk, to swim, to fly?
(Right now it was winter on the mainland. The narrator could picture the frosty magnificence of Kensington Gardens in London. She knew how the moonlight peeked through the clouds and glistened on the tiny snowflakes)
Narrator: Who crafts such tiny details? You might see them if you try. For it's all the work of fairies, but they stay well out of sight.
(INT. NURSERY, BLOOMSBURY – NIGHT. Somewhere on the mainland, at that very moment, a baby lying in her crib laughed with delight. The narrator listened as the laugh, invisible but filled with magic, soared out of the crib. It flew toward the nursery's open window, where a lonely fluffy dandelion poked through through the soil of a window box. The laugh dove through the dandelion and carried one of the soft, white seed wisps into the air)
Narrator: And the first time that a baby laughs, a fairy's life takes flight.
(EXT. LONDON – NIGHT. A new fairy was on its way to Pixie Anaheim. But it had a long road ahead)
(The dandelion wisp flew upward. It was carried across the rooftops of London and through the smoke of a chimney. It blew past Big Ben, along the Thames River, and over Tower Bridge)
(The narrator clasped her hands as she followed the journey of the laugh, still so very far away. So many obstacles. So many things to go wrong)
(The laugh collided with the bell of a slow-moving ship. No one on board heard the almost inaudible ping. But the narrator heard it, and she heard for the laugh's safety)
(But joy is fierce. Joy is strong. And joy is resilient)
(The laugh spun woozily as the dandelion wisp swirled, but before long it regained its bearings and continued on. It touched down briefly on the sea, and a jingle echoed across the waves)
Narrator: (SINGING) When the moon comes out to shine her face
The birds are fast asleep
And the lanterns hang from every post
The fairies leave their keep
They join their hands and sing their songs
That nary a soul can hear
In the springtime when the earth is new
To the fairies they draw near
To the fairies they draw near
(Finally, the tiny wisp was taken up by the wind once more, and the laugh was carried through the clouds and blown toward a shining beacon: the Second Star to the Right!)
(The narrator let out a sigh. All would be well. The laugh was moving quickly now–as eager to reach its destination as the narrator was for it to arrive)
(TITLE CARD: DISNEY FAIRIES)
(EXT. LOS ANGELES, ANAHEIM, CALIFORNIA – DUSK. The laugh approached the city of Anaheim, Los Angeles, California, USA with a jingle and a giggle. Faster and faster it flew, skimming the plains, cresting the mountains, and finally emerging over the home of the citizens: Pixie World)
(EXT. PIXIE ANAHEIM – NIGHT. The enchanted land shimmered with every color of the rainbow. Wintry woods glistened with snow, while nearby a summery glen was bursting with greenery and vines heavy with fruit. Chuckling happily, the laugh sped down toward the center of Pixie Anaheim. There stood a majestic tree-shaped hotel called the Pixie Dust Hotel of Anaheim, a free hotel but not always dissipating as the one in London, has a Pixie Dust Well, 4000 deluxe penthouses, four restaurants including a buffet, a swimming pool and water park, a petting farm, a 5,000,000 gallon aquarium, a concert, an IMAX movie theater where people could watch films from Disney (The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Fantasia, Bambi, Finding Nemo, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs, The Incredibles, The Jungle Book, Toy Story, Toy Story 2, Cinderella, Mulan, Monsters, Inc., Ratatouille, Lilo & Stitch, Tarzan, Pinocchio, Alice in Wonderland, Up, Lady and the Tramp, Atlantis: The Lost Empire, A Bug's Life, The Hunchback of Notre Dame, The Emperor's New Groove, Hercules, Dumbo, The Lion King, Cars, Pocahontas, Sleeping Beauty, Aladdin, and Peter Pan), a nightclub, a comedy club, eight ballrooms, a convention center, a conference room, a video arcade, a live stage theater, a spa, a business center, a fitness center, a pet resort, and even a monster resort, radiating magic)
(The soft tinkling sound of the laugh caught the attention of a garden fairy at work. She looked like a flower herself, dressed in a rose-petal tunic)
(Other garden fairies darted from the bushes and flower beds and began to follow the wisp)
(The wisp floated over a waterfall, where water fairies played. They all shook the water from their wings and happily ran after the wisp)
(The wisp passed under the branches of a pine tree, giggling at the tickle of the pine needles. Animal fairies peeked out from nests and knotholes. They, too, followed)
(Light fairies in shimmering outfits dove through sunbeams to join the procession)
(INT. PIXIE DUST HOTEL – NIGHT. Soon all the citizens of Anaheim arrived at the Pixie Dust Tree. They settled on the branches of the huge, magical hotel like a flock of chattering birds. Their beautiful wings and clothes glowed in the light of the Pixie Dust Well, which surged in the center of the tree. They eagerly waited for the wisp-of-a-laugh to arrive)
(High in the air, VIDIA intercepted the wisp before it could overshoot the mark. Vidia–with her purple clothes, raven hair, and superior attitude–wasn't the most popular fairy in Anaheim. But she was the fastest)
(She flew over, under, and around the laughing wisp, creating breezes to guide it safety to the Pixie Dust Hotel. Finally, the dandelion wisp came to rest on an outcropping of mushrooms that formed a balcony above the well)
(The jingle faded away, and every fairy fell silent and waited)
(A dust-keeper fairy named TERENCE approached the wisp, holding a chalice brimming with pixie dust. He carefully poured the dust over the wisp)
(The wisp swayed with a tinkle. Its shining strands shimmered and waved, moved by the magical dust. When it settled into its final form, the wisp was not a wisp anymore–it was a tiny fairy dressed in a flowing white gown!)
FAIRY 1: Hello.
FAIRY 2: Hello.
Fairies: Hello./Hi./Hello./Hello.
(The new arrival was hardly more than a baby's laugh with a mop of blond hair on top)
Young Tink: (shy voice) Hello?
(When she waved, her fingertips jingled like tiny bells and sent puffs of pixie dust into the air. She stared at the others in wonder, but soon she was distracted by the arrival of the MINISTER OF SPRING, the MINISTER OF SUMMER, the MINISTER OF AUTUMN, and the MINISTER OF WINTER. These elegant leaders of the seasons took their places on perches above the Pixie Dust Well, smiling down on the new fairy with welcoming faces. Then they turned to look at a space between the branches where the air was beginning to shine)
Young Tink: Queen Clarion.
(The new fairy, later named TINKER BELL, watched in wide-eyed amazement as a misty cloud of golden dust wove its way through the limbs of the Pixie Dust Hotel. Then the mist cleared to reveal a radiant and regal fairy with magnificent wings. The narrator was none other than QUEEN CLARION)
(The queen regarded the new arrival with a warm smile)
Clarion: Born of laughter, clothed in cheer, happiness has brought you here. (winking at the new fairy) Welcome to Anaheim. I trust you found your way all right.
Young Tink: (stammer) I think so.
(CLARION LAUGHS)
(Clarion flew behind the new fairy)
Clarion: Now, let's see about those wings.
(With gentle hands, she unfurled two gossamer wings from the little fairy's back)
(The gathering of fairies sighed again: Oooooh!)
(The new fairy seemed dazed and uncertain, until Clarion took her hand and led her into the air. Tentatively, she flapped her wings, rising slowly. She hovered for a moment: then she began to fly with increasing confidence)
(The other fairies applauded and laughed when she raced in a giddy circle and turned a somersault)
(They liked this new arrival. And each fairy looking on hoped that the new fairy would turn out to be a member of his or her talent guild)
(Clarion waved her hand and several dozen toadstools magically sprouted around the edge of the Pixie Dust Well, forming a row of pedestals)
(The fairies fell silent. Arriving and flying were all fine and dandy, but watching a new fairy figure out her talent was the most exciting part)
(One by one, fairies of every sort flew toward the pedestals, clutching small objects that represented their talents. ROSETTA the garden fairy gently carried a beautiful flower. The water fairy named SILVERMIST stepped forward holding a drop of water as if it were a ball and placed it on top of a pedestal)
(IRIDESSA brought a glowing flower lamp–the symbol of the light fairies)
(FAWN, an animal fairy with a long braid, left a tiny egg on a pedestal, but only after giving it a reassuring pat)
(Vidia swept past the new fairy with her nose in the air. She didn't give a hoot what the new arrival turned out to be, but she always enjoyed a chance to show off her abilities. She opened her hand to reveal a tiny spinning whirlwind)
(More and more fairies brought symbols of their talents. The new fairy watched these ceremonial proceedings in confusion. She looked up at the queen)
Young Tink: What are these things?
Clarion: They will help you find your talent, little one.
Young Tink: But how will I know which one is…
(The queen gave the new fairy a gentle push toward the toadstool pedestals)
Clarion: (soothing voice) You'll know.
(When the new fairy approached the flower, Rosetta and her friends huddled close together in delighted anticipation. Several of them gave the new arrival an encouraging nod. The little fairy reached for the flower, but the moment her finger touched the delicate bloom, its glow faded)
(The garden fairies let out a collective sigh of disappointment. But the water fairies were glistening with hope as the new fairy approached the next pedestal. She tried to lift the shimmering droplet of water, but the glimmer around it faded as well. The water fairies sighed)
(The new fairy's attention was next drawn to the whirlwind. As soon as she lifted a tentative hand to touch it, the whirlwind faded into thin air. Vidia smirked. She hated competition)
(The new fairy was getting discouraged. Now she was afraid to touch anything. She flew up and down the line of pedestals. She passed a seed, a lamp, an acorn, a show, an axe, a paintbrush, a large kitchen spoon, and finally, a hammer made from a rock and a piece of wood. As the new fairy soared by, the hammer began to glow)
(The fairies murmured and whispered among themselves)
(The hammer shone brighter and brighter. It practically vibrated with energy. Finally, it rose into the air. Turning end over end, the hammer flew toward the little fairy. Instinctively, she reached out and caught it. Bursts of light shot out in every direction as soon as her fingers closed around the handle)
(The fairies gasped then they began to laugh and applaud. The new fairy had found her talent! Or maybe it had found her)
(Silvermist was impressed)
SILVERMIST: Whoa! (to her friends, Fawn, Iridessa, and Rosetta) Never seen one glow that much before, even for Vidia.
(Vidia, who was hovering within earshot, huffed and looked away, pretending that she didn't hear and didn't care. But she did hear, and she did care. Vidia was used to being one of a kind, and she didn't appreciate being upstaged by a little wisp with a hammer)
(Rosetta's rosy complexion glowed even pinker)
ROSETTA: You know, I do believe you're right. Little daisy top might be a very rare talent indeed.
(Vidia tossed her dark hair off her shoulder and turned away)
(The little blond fairy was still confused. What did it all mean?)
(Clarion put a hand on the fairy's shoulder)
Clarion: (CHUCKLES) Come forward, tinker fairies, and welcome the newest member of your talent guild, Tinker Bell.
(EXT. ANAHEIM — NIGHT. The night air in Anaheim, was always ready for a little magic, like a wish upon a star that might just come true. It was an Evening Star. Its light was just finding its way through a window in the estate mansion)
Tiana: (V.O.) (SINGING) The Evening Star is shining bright
So make a wish and hold on tight
There's magic in the air tonight
And anything can happen...
(INT. BEDROOM, CHARLOTTE'S MANSION — NIGHT. MISS CHARLOTTE LABOUFF (age 4), one of the richest girls in all Anaheim and Tinker Bell (as TIANA) (age 5), the daughter of Eudora and James were dressed in silk and satin. Charlotte was cuddling a soft white kitten named MOLLY in her lap. Tiana and Charlotte looked like two princesses, right down to the little crowns on their heads. Their beautiful dresses had been made by Eudora. Eudora was the finest seamstress in the kingdom, and she often brought Tiana with her when she visited the mansion to do the final fittings. Eudora had created dozens of pretty dresses for Charlotte over the years)
(Right now, Eudora was propping up a big picture-filled storybook to read aloud before she and Tiana had to leave. The two little girls were delighted. They loved it when Eudora brought out a storybook. Four-year-old Charlotte, with her golden curls and blue eyes and five-year-old Tiana, with her blonde braids and blue eyes, snuggled next to each other on the floor, eager to listen)
EUDORA: "Just in that moment, the ugly little frog looked up with his sad, round eyes and pleaded, 'Oh, please, dear princess, only a kiss from you can break this terrible spell, that was inflicted on me by a wicked witch!'"
(Charlotte leaned closer to Tiana)
Young Charlotte: (sweet Southern drawl) (WHISPERING) There comes my favorite part.
Molly: (MEWING)
(Tiana cringed as Eudora turned the page–she knew what was coming next)
Eudora: "And the beautiful princess was so moved by his desperate plea that she stooped down, picked up the slippery creature, leaned forward, raised him to her lips, and kissed that little frog!"
(Tiana closed one eye and wrinkled her nose, but Charlotte was delighted)
(Eudora turned the book around to show the beautiful illustration to the two girls)
Eudora: "Then, the frog was transformed into a handsome prince. They were married and lived happily ever after. The end."
Young Charlotte: (CHEERS) (LAUGHING) Read it again! Read it again!
(The grandfather clock in the hall had just chimed. It was already six o'clock)
Eudora: Sorry, Charlotte. It's time for us to be heading home. (to Tiana) Say "good night," Tiana.
(But Tiana wasn't ready to say good night)
Young Tiana: There is no way in this whole wide world I would ever, ever, ever–I mean never kiss a frog. Yuck!
(Charlotte wrapped one of her long golden curls around her finger)
Young Charlotte: Is that so?
(She reached into the drawer and pulled out a green frog sock puppet. She put it over her white kitten's head and grinned. Molly squirmed. She pushes her up to Tiana's nose)
Young Charlotte: Well, here's your Prince Charming, Tia. Come on. Kiss him.
Young Tiana: No.
Young Charlotte: Kiss him!
Young Tiana: Stop it!
Young Charlotte: Kiss him, kiss him, kiss him!
Young Tiana: I won't, I won't, I won't!
(Charlotte put her nose against Molly's face)
Young Charlotte: I would do it. I would kiss a frog. I would kiss a hundred frogs if I could marry a prince and be a princess.
(Charlotte squeezed Molly and gave her a big old kiss. The kitten squirmed harder. She twisted out of Charlotte's hands and leaped into the air, digging her hands in order to escape. As Molly clung upside down from the curtains, Charlotte picked up the sock puppet, which she had finally shaken off her head)
Eudora: You girls, stop tormenting that poor little kitty. Poor little thing.
(Eudora told them as she gently pulled the kitten down and placed her on a floor)
(Just then, Charlotte's father, BIG DADDY LABOUFF, walked into the room. Big Daddy was large and round as a barrel. He was a jolly man who always seemed to have a smile on his face)
Big Daddy: Evening, Eudora.
(Charlotte jumped to her feet)
Young Charlotte: Daddy! Daddy! Look at my new dress.
(She twirled around for him)
Young Charlotte: Isn't it pretty?
Big Daddy: Look at you. Why, I'd expect nothing less from the finest seamstress in Anaheim.
(Charlotte showed him the pretty princess in the storybook)
Young Charlotte: Ooh! I want that dress!
Big Daddy: Now, sugar...
(But Charlotte tugged on his mustache and begged)
Young Charlotte: I want that one! Please, please, please, please!
(Big Daddy just couldn't resist)
Big Daddy: Eudora, you suppose you can whip something up like that?
(Eudora glanced at the closet, which was filled with princess dresses in all shapes and colors)
Eudora: Anything for my best customer.
(CHARLOTTE CHEERS)
(Big Daddy tried his best to seem stern)
Eudora: Come on, Tiana. Your father should be home by now.
Big Daddy: All right now, princess, you're getting that dress, but that's it.
(INT. HALLWAY, MANSION — NIGHT. Eudora took Tiana's hand and they walk down the mansion's hallway)
Big Daddy: No more Mr. Pushover. Now, who wants a puppy?
(Charlotte squealed with delight as Big Daddy pulled a bloodhound puppy from his kennel)
CHARLOTTE: I do! I do! He's so cute!
(INT. PIXIE DUST HOTEL — NIGHT. We enter the Pixie Dust Hotel)
R. Kelly: I believe I can fly
I believe I can touch the sky
I think about it every night and day
Spread my wings and fly away
I believe I can soar
I see me running through that open door
I believe I can fly
(Tiana was so amazed by this place)
(INT. KITCHEN, PENTHOUSE, PIXIE DUST HOTEL — NIGHT. James had already arrived home from work and had begun making supper)
JAMES: Mmm. Gumbo smells good, Tiana.
Young Tiana: I think it's done, Daddy.
James: Yeah? Are you sure?
Young Tiana: Mmm-hmm.
James: Absolutely positive?
Young Tiana: Yes.
James: Okay, I'm about to put this spoon in my…
Young Tiana: Wait!
(She added a few drops of hot sauce. Then she tasted the gumbo)
Young Tiana: Done.
(Tiana held her breath as her father dipped his spoon into the pot. Eudora looked up from her sewing and smiled)
James: Hmm.
Young Tiana: What?
James: Well, sweetheart, this is the best gumbo I've ever tasted! Come here. Eudora, our little girl's got a gift.
Eudora: Mmm-hmm. I could've told you that.
James: A gift this special just got to be shared.
(Then she ran out the hallway)
Young Tiana: Hey, everybody, I made gumbo!
WOMAN: Ooh, that smells good!
MAN: I got some hush puppies, Tiana. Here I come!
(Soon all the citizens filled the penthouse. Everyone brought a little bit of home cooking to share. Sounds of music and idle chatter drifted through the air)
JAMES: You know the thing about good food? It brings folks together from all walks of life.
(INT. BEDROOM, PENTHOUSE — NIGHT. As Eudora and James got Tiana ready for bed, James told Tiana)
James: It warms them right up and it puts little smiles on their faces. And when I open up my own restaurant, I tell you, people are going to line up for miles around just to get a taste of my food.
Young Tiana: Our food.
James: (LAUGHS) That's right, baby. Our food.
(Then he pulled out a pen and a flyer. Tiana stared wide-eyed at the picture of a glamorous, upscale supper club. Such a restaurant was sure to be filled with the lovely aromas of the best food in the resort. James hoped that a flyer like this would one day advertise the restaurant of his dreams. He wrote the words TIANA'S PLACE on the flyer as the restaurant's name. Tiana grinned from ear to ear. Outside Tiana's ceiling window, the clouds parted, and starlight fell on the little girl's face)
Young Tiana: (GASPS) Daddy! Look!
James: Where are you going?
Young Tiana: Charlotte's fairy tale book said if you make a wish on the Evening Star, it's sure to come true.
(Eudora smiled and lovingly moved over next to her friend)
Eudora: Well, you wish on that star, sweetheart.
James: Yes. You wish and you dream with all your little heart. But you remember, Tiana, that old star can only take you part of a way. You got to help him with some hard work of your own, and then, yeah, you can do anything you said you mind to. Just promise your father one thing. That you'll never, ever lose sign what's really important. Okay?
(Tiana nods)
Eudora: See you in the morning, baby cakes.
(James tucked Tiana into bed. They closed the door as they left the room)
James: Get some sleep.
(Tiana crawled out from under her blankets and scrambled back to the window. After looking up at the Evening Star, she shut her eyes tight)
Young Tiana: Please, please, please!
(Tiana opened her eyes and blinked in surprise. For just a moment, she couldn't believe what she saw. There, on the windowsill, sat a small, fat, green frog. It started back at her, opened its mouth, and let out a loud CROAK! Tiana screamed and ran out the door)
(EXT. LOCAL GYMNASIUM — NIGHT. Tinker Bell turned around to look at the hoop one more time as pictures of WALTER JORDAN appeared. As she began to run to the hoop to dunk the ball like Michael Jordan, more pictures of Air Jordan appeared as the opening sequence began, with the "Space Jam" theme song by Quad City Ds playing in the background)
(TITLE CARD: WALT DISNEY PICTURES PRESENTS...)
(TITLE CARD: GIVE A DAY. GET A DISNEY DAY.)
(The opening sequence for the film featured pictures of Walter over the years: from her college basketball career at the University of Los Angeles to his years as a superstar in the NBA. The opening sequence ends as Walter was in a press conference)
(TAGLINE: FOURTEEN YEARS LATER)
WALTER: I just feel at this particular time that I reached the, uh, pinnacle of my basketball career and I must retire. The one good thing that comes out of this is that my father had the opportunity to see me play my last basketball game, and that means a lot to me.
(The interviewers asked Walter about her plans after retiring from the NBA)
MALE REPORTER: What are you gonna do now?
Walter: Well, I've never really told anybody this, except for one person, and, uh... But I think I'm gonna go play professional baseball.
Interviewer 1: What position will you play?
Walter: I don't know. As a kid, I was a pitcher. I think that would be kind of hard for me to pitch, so I'm gonna play the outfield.
(Tinker Bell scanned the crowd of gorgeous elegant fairies, waiting for one of them to step forward and claim her. But no one did. Instead, they moved aside to make room for a group of gawky, unkempt, tool-belt-wearing tinkers. Among them were a tall and gangly one and a huge and lumpy one)
BOBBLE: Glad we had a bath today, eh, Clank?
CLANK: Excuse us!
BOBBLE: Coming through!
CLANK: Sorry! Make way for tinkers!
(Tinker Bell's heart sank, and the glow faded from the hammer. It fell from her hand and hit the ground with a dull thunk!)
(She stared at the two fairies in dismay)
(The tall, gangly one (BOBBLE) gave her a polite bow. He wore dewdrop goggles that made his eyes look large)
(His big companion (CLANK) lumbered forward)
Clank: Hady-hi, hady-ho, Miss Bell. I'm Clank.
(Something wet hit her in the eye when he spoke, and his voice was so loud it practically knocked her over backward)
(The gangly tinker grabbed Clank by the tunic and pulled him back)
Bobble: Splinters, Clank. Say it, don't spray it.
(When he spoke, his words tripped along in a charming accent from Scotland)
(Then he grabbed Tinker Bell's hand and shook it enthusiastically)
Bobble: Phineas T. Kettletree, Esquire, at your service. Pleased to make your acquaintance.
Clank: Oh, foo! He's Bobble, I'm Clank.
(Bobble rolled his eyes at Clank)
Bobble: (SIGHS) Clank, Bobble.
(He then turned back to face Tinker Bell)
Bobble: We're pleased as a pile of perfectly polished pots you're here.
(Tinker Bell couldn't help smiling at their cheery greeting)
Tinker Bell: Uh… Me, too.
Bobble: (CHUCKLES) Come on, Miss Bell. There's so much to show you.
(Bobble took her hand and they soared into the air)
(EXT. PIXIE ANAHEIM – DAY. He gestured broadly to the enchanted land below them)
Clank: You've arrived at a most wondrous and glorious time.
Tinker Bell: Really? Why?
BOBBLE: Why, it's almost time for the changing of the seasons. You see, here in Pixie Anaheim, there are different realms for every time of year. Well, there's one up ahead.
(EXT. THE WINTER WOODS – DAY. They flew over a group of pine trees white with snow. A blast of cold air made Tink shiver)
Clank: Winter Woods. It's always cold here.
(Bobble pointed toward a group of fairies dressed in silver descending from the sky)
Bobble: Look there! Snowflake and frost fairies returning home for…
Clank: For some well-deserved rest.
BOBBLE: Aye. They've just finished bringing winter to the world.
(EXT. LONG BEACH – DAY. Next, they flew over a beach filled with blue. A fairy hovered in the air, carefully painting the edges of a clamshell. Clearly this was the Summer Realm)
Bobble: It's the off-season for the summer fairies, too.
CLANK: Always practicing that perfect shade of amber, eh?
(EXT. HOLLYWOOD – DAY. Finally, they approached a lush city of film making, bursting with sunshine, where giggling fairies were chasing a dragonfly. A fragrant mixture of honeysuckle and happiness floated upward, and the three tinkers took a deep breath)
(Bobble gestured at the frolicking fairies below)
BOBBLE: And the fairies of Summer Glade still have plenty of time to get ready.
CLANK: But not as much as the summer fairies, of course, because, well…
BOBBLE: Yes, Clanky. Because right now, fairies of every talent are preparing for my favorite season, springtime!
(EXT. PIXIE ANAHEIM – DAY. They turned again, and Bobble pointed to a grassy valley where some fairies, including Iridessa were spinning rainbows out of thin air)
Tinker Bell: Oh!
(One fairy was herding a little group of flower bulbs, which rotted along like small children)
ROSETTA: Get along. Get along, little sproutlings, and dig.
(Others were carefully painting the spots onto patient ladybugs)
Fawn: Hello, there!
(Tink blinked, amazed and delighted with everything she saw)
(Bobble beckoned to her to follow)
Bobble: Come on, Miss Bell. You've got to see where we live.
(They arrived)
Bobble: Welcome to Tinker's Nook.
Tinker Bell: Oh, wow!
(This grand, beautiful place was going to be her new home!)
(But when Clank gently tilted Tink's head down. She had been mistaken. Tinkers' Nook wasn't in the graceful hills up ahead. It was down in a little dirt-floored valley formed by a tangle of twisting tree roots. It wasn't bright and flowery like the rest of Anaheim. Tinker Bell felt a little disappointed)
Tinker Bell: Oh.
Clank: (laugh)
(Bobble smiled proudly)
Bobble: Come on. There's so much to show you.
(Clank and Bobble flew down into the strange little nook, and Tink tentatively followed them)
(EXT. TINKERS' NOOK – DAY. But when they landed, she realized Tinkers' Nook had a charm of its own)
(Unlike the simple flower homes she had seen elsewhere in Anaheim, the tinker fairies' houses were cleverly constructed of twigs and leaves. And each had its own unique shape and design)
(Tinkers' Nook was a busy place, too. Wagons pulled by adorable field mice carried buckets and bushels between the various buildings. Everywhere Tink looked, she saw something new and fascinating. There were tinkers running around in all directions, and the air was filled with the sound of hammering and sawing, happy greetings, and shouts of encouragement)
Tinker Bell: Cute.
(For the first time since meeting the tinkers, Tink began to feel as if maybe things were going to be okay. She walked behind Clank and Bobble, marveling at all the different kinds of work the tinkers did)
(One group was constructing a carriage using a flower for a canopy and a gourd for the wagon. Another was loading baskets made of iris blooms onto a leaf conveyor belt)
Bobble: Just taking some supplies down…
Clank: They're taking supplies down to the workshop.
(He's just as anger as Bobble to make sure Tink saw everything there was to see)
(Overheard, fairies were filling woven-grass baskets with acorns)
TINKER FAIRY: Let her go.
(Bobble adjusted his dewdrop goggles)
BOBBLE: Watch out for falling…
Clank: Watch out for falling maple seeds!
(Bobble pointed to a group of little houses in the neighborhood)
Bobble: And over here is where most of us live. There's your house…
Clank: There's your house, Tinker Bell.
(Bobble tried to tell Clank to knock it off, but Clank was already flying toward the circular house nestled on top of a root)
Tinker Bell: It's mine?
CLANK: Sure is.
(She could hardly believe how cute it was! It looked like a little teapot made out of bark–short, squat, and round, with a curly root on the side that curved like a handle. A jaunty green leaf formed the roof, and Tink caught a glimpse of a chimney peeking out the top)
(She followed Clank, holding her breath)
(INT. TINKER BELL'S HOUSE – DAY. Once inside, Tink gasped with delight)
Bobble: We were hoping the new arrival would be one of us, so we got the place all ready.
(The inside of her little house was wonderful–round and cozy, with wood-grain walls, twig-wicker furniture, and leaf curtains. It was just perfect, as if someone had prepared it especially for her)
(Tink opened the closet door and saw a row of green, leafy garments–each one larger than the last)
(Uh-oh! The decor was wonderful, but the wardrobe selection was...well...She didn't know what to say. Clank and Bobble seemed to notice her dismay)
Bobble: We rounded up some work clothes…
Clank: We didn't know your size.
Bobble: Yes, our apologies, but…
Clank: But they might be too big.
Bobble: Yeah, well, that's only…
Clank: 'Cause you're so tiny.
(He stared at her between his fingers, as if he were measuring her)
(Bobble elbowed Clank to let him know he was being impolite)
Bobble: That'll do, Clank.
(Tink gave them the biggest smile she could to show that she wasn't worried. She'd figure something out. There were so many things to be pleased with, she could hardly contain her happiness)
(Bobble smiled, clearly relieved that she wasn't upset)
Bobble: Please come on down to the workshop when you're ready. Fairy Mary will want to meet you.
CLANK: Goodbye.
(Clank and Bobble bowed and left Tink to enjoy her new home. She couldn't wait to see more of Anaheim! But before she could go out and about, she was going to have to put on something besides a dandelion nightgown)
(She took a humongous leaf muumuu out of the closet and pulled it over her head. It was the perfect size–for Clank)
(After a moment of thought, Tink grabbed a pair of thorn-shears from a table and began to cut. With the help of a pine needle and some spider-silk thread, she solved her wardrobe problem in no time)
(Her mop of blond hair fell into her eyes and she pushed it away impatiently. Now, if she could just do something with this hair...)
(She glanced in the mirror and twisted her hair on top of her hand. her lips curved into a broad smile)
(Yep! That was the look)
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – DAY. Sometime later, Tink found the workshop by following the sound of hammering. The wide, bustling room was scattered with worktables and carpenters' benches. All the work areas were piled high with woven-grass baskets, acorn buckets, and spider-silk sacks)
(On the far side of the workshop, Tink spotted Clank and Bobble fixing a wagon. She hurried to join them)
(Using a stone hammer, Clank was trying–and failing–to pound a wheel onto an axle)
(Bobble pulled at Clank's tunic)
Bobble: Stop! What?
(He leaned in to examine the axle)
Bobble: A five-gauge twig for an axle? Clank, I told you it took a seven.
Clank: Oh, you said five.
Bobble: I said seven! Oh, Clank, I tell you, sometimes you can be pretty, pretty…
(He broke off when he saw Tinker Bell)
Bobble: So pretty.
(Bobble takes his gaze and–POINK! POINK!–his eye-goggle droplets popped)
(Clank stared at Tink)
Clank: Who's that, then?
Bobble: It's Tinker Bell, you snail brain.
(Tinker Bell couldn't help laughing. She knew she looked different–but she hadn't realized just how different!)
(Tink looked around)
Tinker Bell: Wow, everyone seems so busy.
CLANK: Well, spring won't spring itself.
(Bobble nodded, putting his new droplets into his goggles)
Bobble: Indeed, my bellowing buddy. And we tinkers are a big part of it. Allow us to elucidate, Miss Bell.
(Bobble began singing)
Bobble: We fiddle and fix.
Clank: We craft and create.
Bobble: We carve acorn buckets.
Clank: To hold flower paint.
Bobble: Weave saddles and satchels.
Clank: For birdies, you see.
Bobble: Make baskets and bushels.
Clank: To carry the seeds!
BOBBLE: When preparing for spring.
Clank: We do all this and more!
Bobble: Yes, being a tinker is never a bore!
Clank: Yes, being a tinker is never a bore!
(Clank and Bobble ran out of breath and broke off, laughing)
(Tinker Bell clapped with delight)
Tinker Bell: That was great.
Bobble: So you see, Miss Bell, we help fairies of every talent with our creations.
Fairy Mary: Unfortunately, all those fairies are out of luck this year.
(A stern voice interrupted)
Fairy Mary: Unless we can actually deliver these things to them.
(Bobble and Clank snapped to attention as a stout tinker fairy flew toward them)
(Her hair was pulled back in a businesslike way, and every pocket of her green leaf-tunic bulged with tools. She made a soft landing and did some quick calculations on a birdseed abacus)
Fairy Mary: The wagon repairs are finished, I trust?
(Clank and Bobble exchanged a worried look–the repairs were far from finished! They stepped in front of the broken wagon to hide the missing wheel)
Clank: Yes, Fairy Mary.
Bobble: Tip-top shape.
Clank: No wheels missing whatsoever!
(Fairy Mary looked skeptical. She tried to peek around them)
Fairy Mary: Then let's see it.
Bobble: Ah, you see… Well…
Clank: See, with your eyes?
Bobble: Define "see," actually…
(Suddenly, Bobble pointed to Tink)
Bobble: You have to meet Tinker Bell!
(Fairy Mary's head swiveled)
Fairy Mary: What? Who?
(Clank beamed)
Clank: She's new, Fairy Mary.
Tinker Bell: Nice to meet you.
(Fairy Mary's gaze settled on Tinker Bell, and her face lit up)
Fairy Mary: Rapture! A new charge on whom we can lavish all our tinkering wisdom and expertise! Let me see those hands.
(Tink held her hands out for inspection)
Fairy Mary: Teetering teapots, so dainty.
(Fairy Mary smiled at Tinker Bell)
Fairy Mary: Don't worry, dear. We'll build up those tinker muscles in no time.
(Tinker Bell giggled)
Tinker Bell: (CHUCKLES) Okay.
(Fairy Mary turned back to the wagon, all business again)
Fairy Mary: Now, boys, the deliveries?
Bobble: Aye, we're on it. As a matter of fact, we're heading out right this second.
Clank: (not-very-quiet whisper) But we've only got one wheel.
Fairy Mary: What was that?
(Bobble threw Clank a dirty look)
Bobble: (STAMMERING) Nothing really, Clank was just asking…
(He paused, searching for inspiration)
(Tinker Bell stepped between Fairy Mary and the boys)
Tinker Bell: If I can go as well!
(Bobble blinked behind his goggles, clearly pleased with Tink's quick thinking)
Bobble: Yeah! Good one. Very nice.
Clank: Yes! I wondered that, if you could go with us. Yes.
Bobble: That's exactly what he was saying.
(Fairy Mary regarded them all with suspicion)
Fairy Mary: Very well. Get on with it, then.
(She's just reminding them who was boss. Then she bustled off to attend to the next item of business)
(Clank and Bobble jumped into action. Clank picked up the missing wheel. Bobble gave a loud whistle and a mouse came galloping over to pull the cart)
(Tink turned to see if Fairy Mary was watching their departure, and if she had noticed the missing wheel)
(She was)
(She had)
(And she was laughing)
(EXT. BEDROOM, PENTHOUSE — DAY. Tiana came home from work to that very same bedroom. She was tired. She took off her apron and emptied the change from her pocket into a coffee can in her dresser drawer. The drawer was full of jars brimming with coins)
Tiana: Well, Miss Bell, rough night for tips, but every little penny counts.
(Tiana closed the dresser drawer. She glanced at a photograph of James on the dresser. James had passed away and Tiana still missed him)
Tiana: Don't you worry, Daddy. We'll be there soon.
(Tiana picked up the flyer James had given her years ago–picture of the supper club with TIANA'S PLACE written on it. She looked at the image of a lady dressed in fine clothes, standing in front of the big, fancy restaurant, and fondly remembered her plans to start that restaurant with her father. She was not about to give up on that dream now. And she knew she had a lot more work to do to get there. She sat on her bed and rested her head on the pillow. But the next thing she knew, her alarm clock rang. Tiana blinked. She couldn't believe it. It was already time to go to her second job)
(Tiana opened her closet and took out a yellow uniform. She combed her hair)
Tiana: Good night, Cal's. Good morning, Duke's.
(Quickly, Tiana finished dressing. She didn't want to be late for her job at Red Rocket's Pizza Pot. It was close to Mardi Gras, a time when Anaheim came alive with even more music, people, and parties)
Tiana: (SINGING) Seven A.M., the usual morning line-up
Start on the job, and order up 'til the meal's all clean
Polish and wax, be the waitress and shine up
Order again
And by then
It's, like, seven-fifteen
And so I'll read a book
Or maybe two or three
I'll add a few new orderings
To my food gallery
I'll play guitar and knit and cook
And basic'ly
Just wonder, when will my life begin?
(A voodoo witch doctor named DR. FACILIER had never healed anyone. His trade was in working with spells and potions. Tiana had often heard old folks say that there was plenty of magic in Anaheim...but not all of it was good. Dr. Facilier practiced the art of bad magic, and Tiana wanted nothing to do with it)
(Tiana didn't notice Dr. Facilier in his top hat and undertaker's coat standing outside his shop. He cast a long shadow that Tiana could almost swear moved by itself sometimes. It gave her the shivers. Dr. Facilier had gotten the attention of a bald man in the crowd. The man gave Dr. Facilier a few coins. The doctor stretched out his long fingers and blew a pinch of powder into the man's face. Instantly, the bald man's head grew hair! The man seemed to be overwhelmed with his newborn confidence–he had a full head of hair! A pretty girl even looked his way! Then suddenly, hair grew over the man's entire face. The girl shrieked and ran away. So did the poor man when he saw his hairy reflection in a window!)
(Dr. Facilier, with his shadow slinking nearby, let out a chuckle)
Tiana: Then, after lunch, it's puzzles, and darts and baking...
Papier-mache, a bit of ballet, and chess...
Pottery and ventriloquy, candle-making...
Then I'll stretch
Maybe sketch
Take a climb
Sew a dress
And I'll re-read the books
If I have time to spare
I'll paint the wall some more
I'm sure there's room somewhere
And then I'll brush, and brush
And brush, and brush my hair
Stuck in the same place I've always been
And I'll keep won'dring
And won'dring
And won'dring
And won'dring
When will my life begin?
(Down at the docks, photographers anxiously waited as a large white ocean liner lowered its gangplank. Dozens of flashbulbs went off. Everyone wanted to get a look at the fabulously handsome young prince)
(PRINCE NAVEEN surveyed the crowd. He was delighted. He had finally arrived in Anaheim–the city of Disney! Quickly he tossed off his crown, replaced it with a jaunty cap, and grabbed his ukulele as he rushed down the gangplank to join in the fun. Behind the prince, his short, round valet, LAWRENCE, stumbled along with all the prince's heavy luggage)
Tiana: For springtime...
Mardi Gras will appear
Just like they do on my birthday each year
What is it like
Out there where they glow?
Now that I'm older
Mother might just let me go...
(EXT. MORON MOUNTAIN – OUTER SPACE. In Outer Space, there is a scary-looking alien theme park named Moron Mountain. The theme park featured rides and attractions, but there was not many many people at this theme park. However, there were two guests that were on a random ride. An alien father and his son are blasted from the ride they were on. They crashed on the ground. Luckily, they did not get hurt from the oncoming crash)
Alien Kid: Let's get out of here, Dad. This stinks. Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
(INT. LOBBY, MORON MOUNTAIN – OUTER SPACE. Unknown to her, they were being watched on surveillance cameras by MR. SWACKHAMMER, the owner of the theme park and the group of the NERDLUCKS)
Alien Kid: (REPEATED) Don't bring me here anymore, all right?
SWACKHAMMER: Are you listening?
(He turned off the TVs)
Swackhammer: Did you hear him? Did you hear him? That little brat was right. I've told you if I told you once, I told you a thousand, thousand, thousand, thousand times. We need new attractions.
Nerdlucks: Right.
Swackhammer: New ones.
Nawt: Uh-huh.
Swackhammer: Get it?
(NAWT, the red Nerdluck files Swackhammer's fingers)
Nawt: Big, shiny new ones, yeah.
(BANG, the green Nerdluck and BUPKUS, the purple Nerdluck, were licking their sandals)
Bang: Absolutely, sir.
Swackhammer: Look at me. Look at me and listen.
(He flipped her lighter on and lit it on POUND's behind, the orange Nerdluck who was screaming off the table)
Swackhammer: The customer is always right.
Bupkus & Bang (Both): Right.
Swackhammer: The customer is always right.
BUPKUS: Exactly.
Swackhammer: Always.
(As he smoked his cigar, green drool fell from his mouth and landed on BLANKO, the blue Nerdluck. As this was occurring, Blanko just had a look of disgust)
Nerdlucks (All): Right.
(Swackhammer walked to the window, smacking a few Nerdlucks behind him)
Swackhammer: We need something.
NAWT: My bad.
Swackhammer: We need something nutty.
Nawt: Nutty.
Swackhammer: Something wacky.
NAWT: Wacky.
(He sat down on her chair, sitting on the TV remote to turn on the little TVs)
Swackhammer: We need something, something... Something... We need something...
(Bupkus points at the little TVs)
Bupkus: Muppety? Oops.
Nawt: Muppety. Thank you.
Swackhammer: Muppety?
(Swackhammer turned around to see The Muppet Show episodes. There were clips from various shows with guest stars, such as Jim Nabors, Juliet Prowse, Ruth Buzzi, Nancy Walker, Sandy Duncan, Vincent Price, Madeline Kahn, Rita Moreno, Kaye Ballard, Charles Aznavour, Don Knotts, Florence Henderson, Avery Schreiber, Zero Mostel, Julie Andrews, Phyllis Diller, Dom DeLuise, Lena Horne, Peter Sellers, Harvey Korman, Mummernschanz, Candice Bergen, Judy Collins, Rudolf Nureyev, Cloris Leachman, and Bernadette Peters)
Swackhammer: Yes. Muppety. Yes. Now, we're talking. Muppety. Muppety. That's it. That's the word I was looking for. Muppety. Get the Muppets.
Bupkus: (jumped up and cheered) The Muppets!
Swackhammer: Bring them here.
(Blanko raised his hand)
BLANKO: Sir. Just noticing, sir. They're from Earth. What if they can't come?
(Swackhammer looked up)
Swackhammer: What did you say? What if they can't come? (grabs Blanko by his neck) Make them.
Blanko: Cool.
Swackhammer: Make them.
CREATURES: We're gonna go get them. Yeah. All right.
(The Nerdlucks loved their evil idea. Their plan to capture the Muppets was going to come to fruition)
(EXT. BASEBALL FIELD — DAY. While the Nerdlucks were flying down to Muppet Land to capture the Muppets, back on Earth, Walter was having a few problems of his own. When he started his baseball career, he did not realize that he would have some trouble with his batting skills. However, everyone loved him so much when he was playing basketball, they never actually complained about her baseball skills)
(Anyway, Walter was playing in his first baseball game on a regular Saturday afternoon and he was already up to bat. When he came up to the plate and swung his bat, he missed the ball)
UMPIRE: Strike!
(Some people booed at the call, while others actually cheered for the basketball star)
Player 1: Looks good in that uniform.
Player 2: Looks great. Can't teach that.
Player 1: Can't teach it.
(As Walter stepped back up to the plate, the catcher walked up to Walter and smiled at her)
Catcher: Thanks for autographing that basketball for my kid. I'm a hero now.
Walter: No problem. Happy to do it.
Umpire: Let's go!
(The two went back to the game)
(While Walter stepped up to the plate to bat again, the catcher tried to whisper some tips to Walter as he tried to hit the ball)
Catcher: Curve ball. Don't swing. Don't swing.
(The first tip he gave her helped as Walter avoided hitting a wild pitch. However, the second tip confused Walter as he ended up swinging at the ball, getting his another strike)
UMPIRE: Ball!
Catcher: Fastball, outside corner. Swing.
(Another pitch and strike)
Umpire: Strike!
CATCHER: That was your pitch.
Walter: I know, I missed it.
Catcher: Don't worry. I'll get you another one.
(Meanwhile, one of the baseball team's promoters was watching Walter carefully. He had a good idea)
Manager: Tulip. Tulip, come here.
(A 19-year old fairy then came running up to the promoter. She had short black hair and wore a white dress; her name is TULIP)
Tulip: Sorry, I didn't mean to...
Manager: Come here.
Tulip: Yes, sir?
Manager: Make sure nobody bothers Walt. I want him to be the happiest player in the world.
Tulip: The happiest.
(Meanwhile, they were back to batting again)
Catcher: Slider. Don't swing.
(Walter swung the bat again as he ended up getting a strike-out)
Umpire: Strike three!
Catcher: I told you not to swing.
Walter: I couldn't help it.
(The catcher patted her on the back)
Catcher: I understand. Hey, nice talking to you.
(While Walter Jordan walked to the bench, everyone in the crowd cheered for him, even though he struck out. Walter walked over to the bench)
Baseball Player: We're not worried. We're not worried.
PLAYER 1: Good job, Walt.
PLAYER 2: Good hustle.
Baseball Player: Good cut, Walt. Good cut.
Another Player: That was a strikeout, Walt? Good-looking strikeout. Real good.
Another Player 2: You look good when you strike out. When I strike out, it looks nasty. At least you look good. Good-looking.
(While the teens were talking, Tulip appeared from the top of the bleachers. She was talking to Walter)
Tulip: Hi, Mr. Jordan. Mr. Jordan, I'm Tulip...
(However, he did not realize that she was losing her grip from the top as she suddenly fell to the ground as Walter and the teens helped her up and sat her on the bench)
Tulip: Oh, jeez.
Walter: You all right? That was a nasty fall.
Tulip: Yeah. Oh. I'm Tulip Podolak, Mr. Jordan. I'm the Dodgers' new publicist. I'm here to make your life easier. Want me to drive you somewhere? Want me to pick up your laundry, babysit your kids? I will do it. I am here to personally guarantee that no one will ever bother you.
(Suddenly, the wind picked up harshly and a sonic boom was heard in the sky. Everyone looked up to see that it was a blue and black spaceship with red headlights zooming past the stadium and into the clouds)
(Walter could only summarize this occurrence in the best way he knew how)
Walter: What was that?
(The spaceship dive down towards the Earth and through the dirt, making a big hole at a nearby parking lot. The spaceship zoomed through the parking lot. Inside, the spaceship was bouncing around a bit)
(INT. SPACESHIP. The Nerdlucks were ordered by Swackhammer to go to Muppet Land to capture the Muppets, along with their supposed leader who goes by the name of 'Kermit the Frog'. Pound was driving the spaceship while the four other Nerdlucks were sitting in four passenger seats)
Pound: Hang on.
Bang: Hanging on.
Nawt: Hanging on.
(Blanko just looked up)
BLANKO: Are we there yet?
(Everyone screamed as they were diving down to the center of the Earth. Right up ahead, a wall was seen: It was the Muppet Show curtain with the logo. The Muppet Show theme song was heard as the Nerdlucks looked impressed)
Pound: Bombastic.
Nawt: Cool.
(The spaceship went through the curtain like a portal)
(EXT. MUPPET LAND — DAY. As not many people knew about this, Muppet Land is actually another world where the all-Muppet and Sesame Street gang lives. They go through with their daily lives while they do their shows and movies for the viewing public)
(Anyway the usual forest setting was seen. Suddenly, a familiar green frog appeared on the screen. His name is KERMIT THE FROG, a famous and legendary Muppet character and the leader of the Muppets)
DR. TEETH: All right, you irascible frog. Come back here, you skippy amphibian.
(Kermit was running when he stopped for a moment to look at the camera and speak to the audience)
Kermit: I'll, uh, be with you in a second, folks, after I finish with nature boy here.
(Suddenly, DR. TEETH, the leader of the Electric Mayhem caught up to him)
Dr. Teeth: All right, you pesky frog. I got you now.
(Dr. Teeth pointed his guitar to Kermit's face until a giant spaceship randomly lands and squashes Dr. Teeth flat. Luckily, Kermit did not get hurt. Kermit looked up at the giant spaceship as the large doors opened to reveal the Nerdlucks. Pound tries to re-enact the famous astronaut quote)
Pound: One small step for moi...
(Bang was somewhat hyperactive as he went next to Pound with a flagpole)
Bang: One giant leap from Moron Mountain.
(He tried to push the pole into the ground to claim Muppet Land, only to crush Pound's foot hard)
(Pound just yelped in pain as Bang laughed evilly)
(Kermit looks down at the crumpled Dr. Teeth)
Kermit: And one whopper headache for Dr. Teeth.
(The Nerdlucks heard Kermit's voice and walked down to him, but they noticed that they were only a foot and a half tall compared to the green frog)
Kermit: Diminutive, ain't they?
(Bang spoke up)
Bang: We seek the one they call Kermit the Frog.
(He finally calmed down and the other Nerdlucks nodded their heads)
Nawt: Yeah, Kermit the Frog.
Bang: Have you seen him?
Pound: Where is this guy?
BLANKO: Is he around?
(Kermit looked at the audience with a savvy and knowing look, thinking of a plan to easily fool these Nerdlucks. He thought that these little aliens would not be much of a challenge for him. After all, they were way shorter than him and they seemed to be like any other foe that he went up against. He pretended to not be himself in his own sarcastic way)
Kermit: Hmm. Kermit the Frog, Kermit the Frog.
(He began to quiz the aliens)
Kermit: Say, does he have, uh, a great long tongue? Like this?
Nerdlucks: Yeah. Yeah.
Kermit: And does he hop around like this?
(Kermit hopped around the town)
Nerdlucks: Yeah.
Kermit: Well, uh, this is the big one. Does he say, "It's the Muppet Show." Like this: It's the Muppet Show with our very special guest star, Miss Taylor Swift!
Nerdlucks: Yeah!
(Kermit just shrugged it off)
Kermit: Nope! Never heard of him.
(The Nerdlucks just sighed, defeated. They were feeling upset as they thought that they had failed their mission. It now became clear that Moron Mountain would be shut down for good)
Kermit: (to the audience, referring to the Nerdlucks) You know, maybe there is no intelligent life out there in the universe after all.
(Kermit walked down the trail, whistling "Bein' Green" and thinking that he outsmarted those little aliens. Before he walked any further, a giant shot was fired, and the road was blown up, leaving a hole around Kermit, who was covered in soot)
BANG: Hold on there, Mr. Muppet.
(Kermit just turned to the aliens in shock)
BUPKUS: Hey, what do you think we are, stupid?
(He knows about the trick that Kermit pulled over them. When Kermit saw the Nerdlucks, the aliens had laser guns that looked like bazookas!)
Nawt: Don't move a muscle.
(He and the other Nerdlucks pulled their guns back)
Pound: Okay, froggy, gather up your Muppet pals. We're taking you for a ride! Ha, ha.
NAWT: Move it, mister.
(Blanko was excited when Pound said that they were going for a ride)
Blanko: Totally. All right. So, like, where are we going?
(Pound just got annoyed and smacked Blanko upside the head. Blanko vibrated and moved around dizzily)
Blanko: Are we there yet?
(After he said this, Blanko still moved around in a dizzy state until he fell to the ground in a daze)
(EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD — DAY. While Kermit was dealing with the Nerdlucks by laying down a challenge for the freedom of the Muppets, Walter and Tulip drove to Walter's house)
TULIP: Sorry it took so long.
WALTER: Don't worry.
TULIP: That exit wasn't clearly marked.
WALTER: Hold up, right here.
TULIP: What, here?
WALTER: Yes.
(When they reached a 2-story house, they stopped near the sidewalk)
Walter: Thanks for the ride, Sherm. Appreciate it.
Tulip: It's Tulip, Walt.
Walter: Sorry.
Tulip: But you can call me Sherm if you want to. I've followed your whole career. You're the greatest athlete that's ever lived.
(Walter attempted to open the car door, but he noticed that it was stuck)
Walter: Tulip, Tulip, Tulip. How do I get out? The door doesn't work.
Tulip: I'm sorry. I forgot... It's a classic.
(Tulip then got out of the car and helped Walter with the car door as she led her out and they all looked at her house. Tulip looked at the house in amazement)
Walter: Oh, yeah.
Tulip: It's a classic, but it's got a few peccadilloes. Hold on just a second.
Walter: A few, huh? It's smoking, too. You need to get that checked. Thanks for the ride.
Tulip: Oh. Oh, this is nice. This is a nice house. That is a beauty. What is that, Colonial?
Walter: It's a nice house.
Tulip: If you need anything done around the house, I'd be happy...
Walter: Oh, no, I'm fine, thanks.
Tulip: Anything you need.
Walter: You gave me a ride. I appreciate it.
Tulip: Sure.
Walter: Two days I'm gonna drive, okay? So I don't need the ride. But thanks, though.
Tulip: Too conspicuous?
Walter: Yeah.
Tulip: (CHUCKLES) All right. All right.
Walter: Thanks, though.
Tulip: Two days.
Walter: See you in two days.
(Tulip drove away. As Walter walked into the house to relax, he was about to go inside with them when he heard some barking sounds from a nearby doghouse. He then saw a bulldog running towards him)
Walter: Come on, dog. No, not today.
(He was running towards him)
(However, Charles ignored Walter's pleas as he pounced straight to his master, licking his face sloppily. It did take a while for Walter to get Charles off of him, but he was able to do it nonetheless)
Walter: Dog, get off me. Your breath.
(Just then, the HOUSEKEEPER walked up to where Walter was laying)
Housekeeper: Mr. Jordan, are you okay?
Walter: Get off of me!
Housekeeper: Get off of him, Charles.
Walter: Bad dog. Git.
Housekeeper: Get off of him.
Walter: Get off me, Charles.
Housekeeper: Get off of him before I cook you. Come on, come on. Come on, baby. Come on.
(Just then, some of Walter's cousins arrived at the house)
(As drove up to the house with the school's baseball players, Mike appeared out of the car, and looked down)
Walter: Hey, Mike, you okay?
(Mike looked up, and just shook his head)
Walter: How was your game?
MIKE: I don't want to talk.
(As Mike walked into the house, Jodi zoomed past him)
JODI: Hi, Walt.
Walter: Hey, hey.
PASSENGERS: Walter!
(Jodi then walked up to Walter, and kissed him)
Jodi: Walt, Walt!
ROSIE: Hey.
WALTER: Hey.
Rosie: Ooh. You're all covered with drool, baby.
Walter: That's your dog. What's wrong with Mike?
Rosie: He went two for five lost 32 points in his average.
Walter: Is that all?
Rosie: Yeah, so that puts him at like a 685 or something.
Walter: He's batting what?
(EXT. KITCHEN, WALTER'S HOUSE — DAY. As they walked into the house)
Rosie: Mm. Smells good in here. What you cooking?
HOUSEKEEPER: Chicken.
Walter: Chicken and what?
Housekeeper: Chicken and collard greens.
Walter: Good. I'm gonna need a good meal tonight.
Rosie: Is everything okay?
Walter: I stunk up the place. I hope this baseball thing was a good idea.
(EXT. LIVING ROOM, WALTER'S HOUSE — DAY. Walter noticed that his cousins were watching the news about Walter's baseball game)
Jim Rome: (ON TV) It was another career day for Walter Jordan at the field this afternoon. Let's face it. This baseball...
Walter: What are you guys watching?
(He walked into the room where his cousins were all watching TV)
Jim Rome: (ON TV) Today he had three strikeouts.
Walter: Is this the only thing on TV?
Jim Rome: (ON TV) That brings his batting average down...
Walter: What's up with this?
(On the news, the reporter was talking about Walter's strike-outs at the game today while he was talking trash about her game. Walter just watched this and sighed)
Jim Rome: (On TV) ...to an anemic.214, which is also his weight. Baseball bat? Get this guy a tennis racquet.
Mike: Did everyone get mad at you?
Walter: No. Worse. Everyone was real nice about it.
Jim Rome: (ON TV) Walt, I know golf is your sport, but not here.
Mike: I think you should open up your stance a little. It might make you more aggressive at the plate.
Walter: You think so? I'll try to remember that.
Jim Rome: (On TV) Watching this hurts me more than you.
(Walter then picked up the remote to change the channel)
Walter: What are you guys doing watching this stuff? It's bad for you.
(He flicked through several different channels until he stopped at the Muppet Show with Julie Andrews in the Muppet Labs section "Hair-Growing Tonic")
Walter: (leaving the room) There you go. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker. Meep, meep.
(The teens all watched the screen as the episode continued playing. In the episode, DR. BUNSEN HONEYDEW invents a new hair tonic with his lab partner, BEAKER)
(An orange Whatnot gofer named SCOOTER arrived. The fact that this character came in during a Muppet Labs sequence really surprised the viewing audience at home)
Scooter: Oh. Stop this show. (PANTING) We've got an emergency Muppet Character Union Meeting to go to.
(As Bunsen ran out of the scene, Scooter followed after him)
Scooter: Hey, wait for me. Hold your horses.
(Beaker dropped the elixir, and was about to follow Scooter and Bunsen, but the Hair-Raising Tonic shot him into the air to get to the Muppet Character Meeting)
Mark: Dang. Where'd they go?
(EXT. THEATRE, MUPPET LAND — NIGHT. At a big El Capitan Theatre-like theatre where all the Muppets gathered for the meeting, Beaker crashed from the roof...)
(INT. THEATRE — NIGHT. And landed on the carpet floor of the theatre, covered in soot. Someone stepped on Beaker's face and walked up the aisle. The person who was walking up the aisle was the comedian bear with orange fur, a scarf, and a hat. His name was FOZZIE BEAR, another Muppets fan-favorite. He is wrapped in bath towels and soaking wet)
Fozzie: Stop the music. Top bear coming through.
LEW ZEALAND: Hey!
Fozzie: Jeez. It's getting so a guy can't even get himself wet around here. So, what's the big emergency?
(Everyone (Animal and Lew Zealand) turned the figures on stage, which were the Nerdlucks standing there, having Kermit tied up in chains)
Kermit: Uh, these little guys would like to make an announcement. Here you go, shorty.
(The Nerdlucks pushed Pound towards the microphone to speak to the Muppets (Zoot, Animal, Dr. Teeth, Sam Eagle, Rowlf, Pepé, Sweetums, Fozzie, Gonzo, Lew Zealand, Crazy Harry, Janice, Bunsen, Link, Scooter, Pops))
Pound: You, all of you, are now our prisoners.
(A moment of silence occurred throughout the theatre, then laughter from the whole crowd ensured)
ROWLF: We're in big trouble now.
(No one believed the little Nerdlucks at all. Pound was speechless, but Nawt took the mike to speak to the audience)
Nawt: We are taking you to our theme park in outer space.
Blanko: No fooling.
Nawt: Where you'll be our slaves. And placed on display for the amusement of our paying customers.
(As Nawt said this, ROWLF THE DOG was still laughing as POPS was asking Scooter if the aliens were serious. Scooter responded with a shrug and a smirk)
Gonzo: Oh, fear clutches my breast.
(The Muppets still did not believe the little aliens. Suddenly, FLOYD PEPPER, the bass player of the Electric Mayhem walked up to the stage, holding his guitar)
Floyd: We ain't going nowheres.
(He held up his guitar near Pound. However, Pound responded by talking out his fire extinguisher and turned Floyd into the snowman. Everyone gasped and held their hands up in the air as if they were arrested)
(Before the Nerdlucks could take them on away, Kermit decided to intervene)
Kermit: Uh, not so fast. You just can't turn us into slaves. That would be bad. You must give us a chance to defend ourselves.
(While he was saying this, Kermit easily took off the chains that he was wrapped around in. Pound turned to Kermit and held up his laser gun)
Pound: Oh, yeah? Who says?
NAWT: Says who?
BUPKUS: Why?
Kermit: Just a sec.
(He turned around, wrote something on a large book that he had acquired and showed the book to the Nerdlucks)
Kermit: There. Read it and weep.
(The book was actually a book titled "How to Set a Stage" with Kermit using a sticky-note saying "Give Them a Chance to Defend Themselves" The Nerdlucks did not know that though. They read the page that Kermit told them to read)
Nerdlucks: What's this? (reading) "Give them a chance to defend themselves."
Bang: Aw. Do we have to?
Nawt: It's in the rule book.
Bupkus: It is.
Blanko: Okay. It is in the rulebook.
Kermit: (SPEAKS IN SPANISH) We have to confer.
(He and the other Muppets went to the backroom to discuss their plan)
(INT. BACKROOM, THEATRE — NIGHT. Kermit came out with an army uniform, and there was an American flag on the wall as he talked to his friends in an army general manner similar to General George S. Patton)
Kermit: All right, troops. It is for us to choose a battlefield that affords us—
(Until Scooter stopped him with an idea of his own)
Scooter: Oh, I got it.
Kermit: Yes, Private Scooter? (as his hat covered his eyes a bit)
(Scooter walked up to the group nervously and told them his idea)
Scooter: How about we challenge them to a spelling bee?
(Dr. Teeth, however, just scoffed at Scooter's idea)
Dr. Teeth: Say, we could have a bowling tournament. (CHUCKLES)
(Just then, Rowlf the Dog walked in)
Rowlf: Suffering succotash. What's wrong with all of you? I say we get a fishing pole, wait till the barbecue guy's out of the yard, and then grab that food.
(Rowlf was in the middle of having another imagination that involved him finally stealing the hot dog from the barbecue grill and began to breathe manically until Kermit calmed him down)
Kermit: Whoa, whoa, take a deep breath, Rowlf.
(He patted Rowlf's back, to which Rowlf nodded rapidly)
Kermit: Okay, let's analyze the competition.
(He pulled out a chart that was the blueprint of the Nerdlucks)
Kermit: Now, uh, what are we looking at here? We got a small race of invading aliens.
Fozzie: Small arms. Short legs.
Dr. Teeth: Not very fast.
Rowlf: Tiny little guys.
Scooter: Can't jump high.
(Suddenly, an idea for a challenge came into everyone's minds. They (Kermit, Fozzie, Scooter, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Gonzo) all smiled evilly as they thought up the plan while they went back outside to tell the Nerdlucks about their challenge)
(INT. THEATRE — NIGHT. Kermit picked up a random basketball and spun it on top of his finger while he approached the aliens)
Kermit: We challenge you to a basketball game.
Pound: All right. Basketball it is.
Bang: Basketball.
Nawt: Basketball.
Bupkus: Boy, oh, boy.
Blanko: All right.
(He began to realize what this game called 'basketball' really is)
Blanko: What is basketball?
Bupkus: (curiously) What's that?
Nawt: (shrugging at Bupkus) Beats me.
Bang: We didn't have that at school.
(Kermit just raised an eyebrow at the Nerdlucks for not knowing much about the game of basketball. He figured he had to teach the aliens how to play basketball ... through a retro tutorial movie)
Kermit: Lights.
(The lights went down and the movie began to play as LEW ZEALAND, the boomerang fish thrower squeezed through the aisle to find a good seat while blocking the movie screen from the other Muppets (Zoot, Animal) in the audience)
LEW ZEALAND: Pardon me. Sorry.
Zoot: Hey! Down in front.
(He quickly threw a bag of popcorn at Lew Zealand, making him fall so the rest of the Muppets could watch the movie)
NARRATOR: An exhilarating team sport currently growing rapidly in popularity is basketball.
(Various clips of different basketball games were shown)
Newsreel Narrator: (V.O.) Unlike football and baseball, only five men can play on a team. It's the fast-paced, razzle-dazzle game that requires quick wits and even faster reflexes. Here's how it's done in the professional ranks, the National Basketball Association, featuring the best players in the world.
(Suddenly, the Nerdlucks got an idea. Maybe he and his fellow Nerdlucks could go around the world and see how basketball is really played. They can learn from the league's premier players and everything!)
Nawt: The best players in the world.
Bupkus: The best.
(EXT. THISTLE TRAIL – DAY. Tink rode next to Bobble in the mouse-drawn wagon as they headed to Springtime Square with their many deliveries. Clank trotted along beside them, holding up the axle where the wheel was missing)
Clank: Slow down, Cheese, I can't keep up!
Cheese: (SQUEAKS)
TINKER BELL: The mouse's name is Cheese?
(Bobble shrugged)
BOBBLE: Must be. He always comes when we yell it.
(Tink heard a pitter-patter behind the wagon. When she turned to find out what was making the sound, all she could see was swaying grass and a worried look on Clank's face)
(A very worried look!)
(The pitter-patter grew louder. Tink peered through the weeds and flower stalks to see who–or what–was out there)
(She glanced at Clank again. He seemed even more alarmed. His eyes were darting back and forth, searching the landscape and peering into the weeds. Tink's heart began to pound, and she tightened her grip on the edge of her seat. She had a feeling that something bad was about to happen)
Tinker Bell: (SCREAMS)
(Suddenly, Clank lurched forward)
Clank: OOOUGH!
(Tall, prickly plants came running toward them at full speed)
CLANK: Sprinting thistles! Bobble! Bobble!
(They gouged the sides of the wagon, scratching the paint and poking Clank in the backside)
Clank: AAAUGH!
(Cheese was so scared that he bolted ahead, pulling the wagon on one wobbly wheel)
(The wagon careened wildly down the path with Tink and Bobble holding on for dear life)
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – DAY. As they barreled into Springtime Square, Tink caught a quick glimpse of fairies flitting back and forth, carrying berries, seeds, pots, and baskets. Piles of supplies were neatly stacked everywhere. Then the wagon hit a bump–and soared into the air! Tink and Bobble yelled, and fairies scattered in every direction, jumping and diving to get out of the way)
(The wagon landed with a tremendous THUMP! Tink and Bobble were thrown to the ground, and Cheese squeaked in dismay)
(Fawn ran toward the scene of the crash with some other fairies. She grasped Cheese's bridle and stroked his nose)
Fawn: Easy. Easy, boy.
(The frightened mouse immediately began to calm down)
Fawn: It's all right. Fawn's got you.
(Tink sat up, woozy and disoriented. Silvermist ran toward her)
Silvermist: (imitating Fawn's tone) Easy. Easy, girl. It's all right. Silvermist's got you.
(She earnestly stroked Tink's nose–which really didn't do much more than tickle)
(Rosetta and Iridessa flew to join them)
Rosetta: Oh, you all right, sugar cane?
(Tink tried to sit up, but Iridessa pushed her back down)
Iridessa: Be careful, Rosetta, she may faint! Elevate her legs. No, wait.
(She pulled Tink back up)
Iridessa: I mean her head. Wait, wait, wait. Okay.
(Iridessa chewed on a nail, muttering to herself. She was obviously trying to remember what they had told her in fairy-aid training. Then she snapped her fingers)
Iridessa: (triumphantly) If she's red, raise the head. If she's pale, raise the tail.
(She grabbed Tink's face and smooshed her cheeks between her hands)
Iridessa: Does she look pale or red?
(There was an awkward silence as the other fairies examined Tink)
Rosetta: She looks squished.
(Iridessa's glow flickered with embarrassment as she realized she had gone a little overhead with the fairy aid)
Iridessa: Sorry.
(She lets go of Tink's face. Tink did her best to smile reassuringly at the light fairy)
Silvermist: Here, let me, raindrop.
(She took Tink's arm and helped her up)
Silvermist: So, what happened to you, anyway?
Tinker Bell: Well, I…
(Tinker Bell didn't even know where to begin. Just then, Clank and Bobble popped up from beneath a pile of berries)
Clank: (in answer to Silvermist's question) It was sprinting thistles!
(Fawn, Rosetta, Silvermist, and Iridessa gasped)
(Rosetta angrily put her hands on her lips)
Rosetta: Those weeds are an absolute menace. Always trampling things, poking people in the petunia.
(Tink felt a rush of pride as she watched Bobble and Clank straighten the wagon and organize the pots and gardening supplies in the back. The garden fairies couldn't do what they did without the help of the tinker fairies)
BOBBLE: Gather round, ladies. We've brought some selections from the new spring line of tinker specialties!
Fawn: All right!
Silvermist: Show us, show us!
(Iridessa's glow flickered with anticipation)
Iridessa: What'd you bring?
(Bobble handed Iridessa several tubes made of bark)
Bobble: Your rainbow tubes, Iridessa.
(Iridessa snatched the tubes gratefully)
Iridessa: (GASPS) Finally! Silvermist, could you help me?
(Silvermist smiled and sprayed a fine mist of water into the air. Iridessa flew through it, spreading her arms and creating a rainbow with her pixie dust. Then she landed, grabbed an edge of the rainbow, and rolled it into a tube)
(Tinker Bell was astounded)
Tinker Bell: What're you gonna do with that?
Iridessa: I'm gonna take it to the mainland.
Tinker Bell: What's the mainland?
Silvermist: It's where we're gonna go change winter to spring. The seasons change all the time there.
Rosetta: I'll get to apply my artistic sensibilities.
(She accepted a pussy willow paintbrush from Clank, dipped it in a nearby bucket, and began painting a blossom)
(Fawn took a milkweed-pod satchel from Bobble's hands and dropped a handful of nuts into it)
Fawn: Yeah. And I'll have breakfast ready for all the wittle fuzzies coming out of hibernation.
(Tink was just about to ask how to get to the mainland when Iridessa took her hand and pulled her into the air. Iridessa pointed toward the sky)
Iridessa: We just follow the second star…
Silvermist: Ride the breeze, follow the waves…
Rosetta: (taking up the story) All the way across the sea…
Fawn: And then, there it is.
(She waved her hand to create a sparkling cloud of pixie dust)
(The whole thing sounded so exciting and so beautiful, it took Tink's breath away. She struggled for words)
Tinker Bell: Wow! The mainland sounds
(She couldn't think of a word powerful enough, so she made one up)
Tinker Bell: flitterific!
(Tink's new friends looked at each other and shrugged modestly)
Bobble: (CHUCKLES) Yes. The glamorous lives of the nature-talent fairies, eh? We'd love to stay and chat, but…
Clank: But we tinkers have real work to do. Right?
FAWN: Don't get your wings in a bunch.
ROSETTA: Don't be like that.
(Bobble and Clank motioned to Tink to follow, and the three tinkers darted back to the wagon as the fairies teased them. Tink could tell that this good-natured back-and-forth was as much a part of the routine as the new deliveries were)
(She took her seat on the wagon next to Bobble. Clank picked up the axle. Tink turned and waved at her new friends)
Tinker Bell: Nice to meet you all!
FAWN: You, too! Fly with you later!
ROSETTA: Fly with you later!
(EXT. FLOWER MEADOW – DAY. Bobble pulled Cheese to a stop as the wagon rolled into Flower Meadow. Bobble consulted his leaf-scroll list)
BOBBLE: Right! Here we are. A pretty large order of pollen pots for the…
(He flinched as a purple blur zipped past them with a whoosh!)
(The blur slowed for a moment. It was Vidia. She twirled around and around, whipping the air into a funnel of wind. The funnel hovered over a flower, sucking up the pollen. Then it moved to another flower and repeated the trick)
(Tink was mesmerized as she watched the pollen-yellow whirlwind gather more and more dust out of the flowers. Neither Clank nor Bobble seemed to pay much attention. She guessed they had seen all this before. But Tink was fascinated, and she wanted to learn more about this fairy)
(Clank unloaded some pollen pots, and Bobble looked at his leaf scroll, figuring out their next stop)
Bobble: Last thing is berry bushels to deliver to the glen…
(Tink interrupted)
Tinker Bell: Is it okay if I just catch up with you later?
(Bobble shrugged)
Bobble: Oh, I suppose.
Clank: Can you find your way back?
(He put down the last of the pots and took up the axle again)
(Tinker Bell's eyes were still glued on Vidia)
Tinker Bell: Yeah, yeah. Sure I can.
BOBBLE: Well, I… All right, then.
Clank: Just be careful!
(As the wagon rumbled off, Tinker Bell flew over the flowers and followed behind Vidia, who was busy guiding the whirlwind toward the pollen pots)
Tinker Bell: Hi, there!
(Her voice startled Vidia so much that she lost control of the pollen-filled whirlwind. The stray wind spun away from the two fairies, throwing pollen everywhere and knocking over the carefully stacked pots)
Tinker Bell: Sorry.
(Vidia glared at her, pollen was swirling in the air between them. This wasn't going at all the way Tink had hoped. She smiled sheepishly and tried again)
Tinker Bell: Vidia, right?
Vidia: (violently) (SNEEZES)
(Her black ponytail momentarily flipped forward. Then, without a word, she flew away to continue her work)
(But Tink was determined to make friends)
Tinker Bell: We didn't officially meet. I'm Tinker Bell.
(Vidia came to a stop and gave her a long look)
Vidia: Oh, yes. The new girl.
Tinker Bell: That's right! So, what's your talent?
(Vidia began spinning again, until she was nothing but a blur. When she slowed down enough to be visible, she fixed Tink with a cocky glare)
Vidia: What do you think it is?
(Tink bit her lips)
Tinker Bell: You're a pollen-izer? Pollen-ator?
(Vidia's eyes narrowed)
Tinker Bell: Pollen-picker? Pollen-plucker?
(Vidia looked at Tinker Bell)
Vidia: I am a fast-flying fairy, a true rare talent. And this is but a small part of what I do. I make breezes in the summer, blow down leaves in the fall. My winds even brought you here, dear. Fairies of every talent depend on me.
(Tinker Bell smiled)
Tinker Bell: Hey, that's just like what I do.
Vidia: (SNORTS) Excuse me?
Tinker Bell: I mean, tinkers help fairies of every talent, too. So we're kind of the same, you know?
(Vidia's wings fanned slowly. She draped an arm over Tink's shoulders and leaned closer)
Vidia: Sweetie, I make forces of nature. You make pots and kettles. I work up in the sky, and you work down in a ditch.
Tinker Bell: Hey!
Vidia: Don't get me wrong, sunshine. Being a tinker is really swell and all, but I wouldn't go around bragging about your talent. It's not like spring depends on you.
(Tinker Bell refused to be put down)
Tinker Bell: Of course it does! And when I go to the mainland, I'll prove just how important we are.
(Vidia looked confused)
Vidia: When who goes to the mainland?
(Tink almost rolled her eyes)
Tinker Bell: Me, of course! For spring!
(Vidia smiled. It wasn't a very nice smile)
Vidia: Oh, of course. You'll prove it, huh?
Tinker Bell: Yes, I will.
(Vidia's nasty smile got bigger)
Vidia: Well, I, for one, am looking forward to that. Excuse me.
(She flew off so fast, Tink could hardly see her go)
Tinker Bell: No. Excuse me.
(Okay. So it wasn't much of a comeback–but at least Tink had the last word)
(EXT. BEACH, LONG BEACH – DUSK. Tiana flew over Anaheim, replaying in her mind the exchange with Vidia)
Tinker Bell: (mimicking Vidia's sarcastic voice) "Mine is a rare talent." Ugh.
(Tink snorted in disgust)
Tinker Bell: Try and tell me tinkers don't matter. I'll show her what a rare talent really is, when I…
(She broke off as a glint of light caught her eye. It was coming through the street below)
(Curious, Tink flew down to investigate. She followed the glint to a sandy cove near where the ocean's waves lapped gently against California's shore. She landed where she thought she'd seen the glint and began digging with her hands)
(Before long, Tinker Bell uncovered a silver coin. She turned the coin from side to side, watching it catch and reflect the fading rays of the sun. It sparkled so beautifully!)
(Are there any more of these? she wondered. She began to dig again)
(The sand yielded treasure after treasure)
(First she unearthed a huge brass screw. She spun it on her finger)
(Then Tink found a spring. She loved the way she could push and pull it and then watch it snap back into shape with a defiant sproing!)
(But the most fascinating thing she found was an eyeglass lens about the size of a fairy's window. Tink put her hand behind it and watched the lens magnify and distort her fingers. She laughed out loud)
(Tinker Bell hurried to gather up all her treasures, piling them into a wobbly stack in her arms)
(Tink smiled happily. She wasn't just a tinker fairy–she was a treasure-finding fairy! Here she was, brand-new to Anaheim, and already she had discovered these amazing things. Tink wasn't sure just how, but she knew that with these treasures, she would surely find a way to prove herself)
(Then Vidia would see how important a tinker fairy could be!)
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – EVENING. Bobble looked up from his bench when Tink flew into the workshop with her armful of treasures)
Bobble: Hey, Tink, what you got there?
Tinker Bell: Oh, hi. I don't know. I just found them.
(She plopped the treasures down on her worktable. Clank and Bobble hurried to examine them)
Clank: (SNIFFS) Lost things.
(Tinker Bell frowned)
Tinker Bell: Lost things.
(Bobble nodded)
BOBBLE: Aye. Stuff gets lost and washes up on Anaheim from time to time. You know, from the mainland.
Tinker Bell: These come from the mainland? That place sounds more fascinating all the time.
(Before Clank could answer, Fairy mary came bustling by with her seed abacus and checklist, busily taking note of the items and supplies)
Fairy Mary: Berry bushels, check. Pollen pots, check.
(She absently glanced at Tink's worktable)
Fairy Mary: Lost things, check.
(Fairy Mary broke off with a frown)
Fairy Mary: Lost things? Why are you fiddling with that junk?
(Tinker Bell shrank under Fairy Mary's disapproving glare)
Tinker Bell: Oh, um… Well, they were just so unusual.
Fairy Mary: You mustn't be wasting your time with that rubbish. And I won't have it cluttering up my workshop.
(She shot a stern look at Clank and Bobble)
Fairy Mary: And as for you two, no more dilly-dallying around. And don't forget about the Queen's review tonight. Goodness, there’s still so much to be done! Thank you.
(Fairy Mary started to gather up the Lost Things and flew away with her arms full)
(Clank noticed Tink's disappointed look)
Clank: Sorry about your trinkets, Miss Bell.
Bobble: Well, we'd best be getting ready for the review, anyway.
(Tink lifted her head)
Tinker Bell: What is the Queen's review?
(Bobble rubbed his hands in anticipation)
Bobble: You see, the Queen is going to review all the preparations for spring!
(Clank smiled)
Clank: Yeah, it's a good time for us tinkers to show what we can do, eh?
Bobble: Oh, indeed.
(Tink's spirits brightened considerably)
Tinker Bell: Really?
(Clank jerked his head toward the wagon)
CLANK: Like me. I can be a wheel.
(He joked as he and Bobble headed back to their worktables)
(Tink didn't laugh. Her mind was already racing ahead, making plans)
Tinker Bell: Perfect. That's my chance.
(Tink dove into action. She gathered twigs, sap, walnut shells–even silk from a surprised but good-natured spider)
(Her moment was coming, and she had to be ready)
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – NIGHT. Springtime Square was full of fairies feverishly working to make everything ready for the Queen's Review)
(Flower-painting fairies lined up buckets of fresh-squeezed flower paint. Planting fairies stacked bushels of seeds and nuts to be counted)
(Ladybugs stood in rows. Some waited patiently for their black dots to be applied; others still needed their first coat of red. A fairy waved them over)
Flower-Painting Fairy: Okay, everybody, turn! Ready for the base coat over here!
(Fawn, Rosetta, Iridessa, and Silvermist were busy with their own tasks, and Clank and Bobble hurried from group to group, lending a hand wherever they were needed)
(The Minister of Spring floated through the square, overseeing everything. His face was serious, but his clothes were joyous and colorful. he wore a long, blue robe, with a pink azalea blossum on his lapel)
(A garland of leaves held the minister's long hair off his high forehead as he bent over his leaf-scroll checklist)
Spring: Splendid, splendid. Stack those neatly, plenty of time before the Queen arrives.
(He broke off when he heard a tinkling sound)
FLOWER FAIRY 1: It's the Queen!
Spring: What? She's here? Now? Play, music fairies. Yes, play!
(A band of music fairies struck up a Celtic tune, signaling the others to line up along the pathway. The fairies hurried to take their places)
(Queen Clarion came gliding in with the Minister of Autumn, the Minister of Winter, and the Minister of Summer behind her)
(The Minister of Spring bowed with great dignity)
Spring: Queen Clarion, Your Illustriousness! As Minister of Spring, I welcome you to Springtime Square.
Clarion: What? No fireworks, Minister?
(The Minister of Spring looked panicked)
Spring: Oh, well, yeah, that could be arranged. Light fairies! Light fairies!
(Clarion giggled)
Clarion: I'm teasing. You always make such a fuss, and everything always turns out wonderfully.
(The Minister of Spring relaxed and laughed)
Spring: (CHUCKLING) Well, I think you'll find that we have things well in hand.
(He pointed at a large, closed flower growing on an ornate platform)
Spring: When the Everblossom blooms, we'll be ready to bring spring to the mainland!
Clarion: Music to my ears.
(Clarion turned to the crowd)
Clarion:  I know you've all put in months of practice and preparation, but keep up the good work these last few days, because just as fairies…
TINKER BELL: Queen Clarion!
(The queen broke off in surprise when Tink came hurtling along in her wagon. Tink pulled Cheese to a screeching halt, jumped out, and shouldered her way through the crowd to the front)
Tinker Bell: Queen Clarion! Did I miss anything?
(The music squawked to a halt, and the crowd turned toward Tink, annoyed and surprised)
Spring: No, no, no.
Tinker Bell: Phew! Good.
(Tink pretended to wipe her brow in relief)
(The Minister of Spring stepped forward to send Tink away, but Clarion put a hand on his shoulder)
Clarion: It's all right.
(Tink motioned for the fairies in front of the wagon to make room. She lifted the leaf tarp that covered the back)
Tinker Bell: I came up with some fantastic things for tinkers to use when we go to the mainland.
(The queen's eyebrows rose in surprise)
(Some of the fairies in the crowd whispered. Others glared)
TINKER BELL: Let me show you!
(Tink held up her first invention. The contraption looked like a nutcracker mad of sticks, rocks, and grass twine)
(She turned to Fawn)
Tinker Bell: First, baby chipmunks can't eat the whole nut, right? Their little teeth can't chew big bites.
(Tink placed a big nut in the contraption and began to crank)
Tinker Bell: So you just crank back this lever, and it's…
(The rocks pressed on the shell from either side, tighter and tighter. But instead of cracking–)
(BLAM!)
(The nut shot out of the device and smacked a baby squirrel right in the nose)
(The little creature stood stock-still, shocked. Then his big, dark eyes welled up with tears and his furry little chin quivered. There was a terrible silence in Springtime Square, until the squirrel let out a wail and ran off. All the fairies watched, horrified)
(Tink did her best to smile)
Tinker Bell: (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Whoops. It's kind of a work in progress.
Spring: Yes, yes, yes. Very clever.
(From the Minister of Spring's finger snap, the music resumed)
(But it was no use. Tink kept right on. She knew she could do this. Her next invention was sure to go over better)
Tinker Bell: And I made this, too. It's a flower-sprayer.
(Clarion held up her hand, trying to stop her)
CLARION: Tinker Bell, I…
Tinker Bell: Here, allow me to demonstrate.
(Tinker Bell turned the wooden handle and...KERBOOM!)
(The contraption exploded, covering the Minister of Spring with berry paint)
(The music resumed but stops again)
Tinker Bell: Sorry. But wait till you see this last one.
(This wasn't going so well. She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up at the queen)
(Clarion's eyes wee understanding and full of sympathy, but her voice was firm)
Clarion: Tinker Bell, sweetheart, has no one explained?
(Tinker Bell bit her lip. Her heart pounded and she felt her throat tighten. She had a bad feeling that whatever Clarion was going to say wasn't something she wanted to hear)
Tinker Bell: Explained what?
Clarion: Tinker fairies don't go to the mainland, dear.
Tinker Bell: What?
Clarion: All of those things are done by the nature-talent fairies. Your work is here in Anaheim.
Tinker Bell: But I thought that…
Clarion: I'm sorry, Tinker Bell.
(Tink looked at the assembled fairies. Some would not meet her eyes. Others gazed at her sympathetically)
(Only Vidia seemed to be enjoying Tink's heartbreak. Her face was twisted in a mean smirk. Tink didn't want to give her any satisfaction. She tried to pull herself together)
Tinker Bell: Oh, okay. No. No, that's good. I mean, I really couldn't make it anyway. So, good. Yeah. This actually works out good. I mean, well… So, I'm just gonna… Yeah.
(She took the reins and began leading Cheese away, trying not to look at the crowd as it parted for her)
(The music fairies burst into feverish song, desperate to fill the unhappy silence)
(Iridessa and Fawn hurried toward the wagon, with Clank and Bobble running behind them. Rosetta and Iridessa flew along, too)
(But Tink turned away from them. She shook the reins to hurry Cheese, eager to disappear into the dark so that she could cry undisturbed)
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – NIGHT. Back in the empty workshop, Tink dropped her contraptions on her worktable and slumped down on her stool)
Fairy Mary: (O.S.) Back so soon?
(Tink spun around in surprise)
(Fairy Mary stood on the far side of the workshop, checking on supplies and making tick marks in her leaf notebook)
Tinker Bell: You didn't go?
Fairy Mary: Goodness, no. Far too much work to do down here.
(Tink watched Fairy Mary cheerfully counting pots and wondered how she could be so satisfied)
Tinker Bell: Vidia was right. Being a tinker stinks.
Fairy Mary: Excuse me?
Tinker Bell: It's just, why don't we get to go to the mainland?
(Fairy Mary snickered)
Fairy Mary: The mainland? Who gives a pile of pebbles about the mainland?
Tinker Bell: But, Fairy Mary, the other fairies get to go.
(Fairy Mary put her hands on her lips)
Fairy Mary: Now, Tinker Bell, are you a garden fairy?
Tinker Bell: Well, no.
Fairy Mary: Are you a light fairy? Animal fairy? Water fairy, perhaps?
Tinker Bell: No and no.
(Fairy Mary shook her head)
Fairy Mary: No. You're not. You are a tinker. It's who you are. Be proud of it.
(She began to fly away, pausing to add)
Fairy Mary: The day you can magically make the flowers grow, or capture the rays of the sun and whatnot, then you can go. Until then, your work is here.
(With that, she was gone)
(Tink let her fall on the table in despair. There had to be something better in store for her than this–a pile of failed inventions and no trip to the mainland. There just had to be)
(Thanks to Fairy Mary's words, it wasn't long before she had a brand-new idea)
Tinker Bell: Good idea, Fairy Mary.
(Tink spread her wings and zipped into the air)
(She had a foolproof plan, and when the Everblossom bloomed, she would be among the fairies leaving for the mainland. This time for sure!)
(INT. STADIUM, MADISON SQUARE GARDEN, NEW YORK CITY — NIGHT. Everyone was cheering as the game between the New York Knicks and Phoenix Suns was played. It was in the middle of the second quarter, and things began to heat up between the Phoenix Suns and New York Knicks. The Suns were leading and Knicks by six points. As the audience urged the players on, a tall figure tried to find a seat. This "figure" was the Nerdlucks)
POUND: Excuse me. Oh, so sorry.
NAWT: Excuse me.
(The Nerdlucks sat down next to a couple)
BUPKUS: Ow. Get your feet out of my nose.
BANG: Quiet, they're looking.
(Nawt looked up to see the game)
NAWT: Hey, it's basketball.
BANG: Where?
BLANKO: Whoa. Now what?
(During the game, as CHARLES BARKLEY made another shot, and the FEMALE FAN saw the Nerdlucks inside the coat, Nawt began to warn them)
NAWT: Hey, hey!
POUND: What?
NAWT: She's looking again.
BANG: Close it up.
(He closed the jacket up)
Blanko: Tightly.
(They closed it tightly, accidentally stepping on Bupkus inside the coat)
BUPKUS: Aah. You poked me again.
(NERDLUCKS GRUNTING)
Female Fan: Sweetheart?
Male Fan: What?
Female Fan: I thought you'd get better seats.
Male Fan: This is as good as I could get.
Female Fan: This guy next to me is doing something very weird in his raincoat.
Male Fan: Honey, will you just let me watch the game? Barkley killing us.
(This suddenly caught Bang's attention)
Bang: Hey, someone's killing someone.
Blanko: No. Seriously?
POUND: Wow, a killer. Let me see.
(The Nerdlucks saw Charles Barkley on the basketball court)
Nawt: There. That's him, the killer. He's big.
Blanko: He's good.
Pound: He's mine.
NAWT: Okay, go get him.
POUND: Yeah.
(With that, Pound changed into a puddle of goo as he went up to Charles Barkley, and went inside of him to take his talents)
Danny Ainge: Get back on defense. Let's go. Get back on defense, man.
(PATRICK EWING then made a dunk as Charles Barkley's coach and fellow teammates were wondering what was going on with him)
Paul Westphal: What are you doing?
(He ended up acting so weird that the coach had to call a timeout)
Paul Westphal: Time out. Call a time out.
(The Suns went to the bench for the 30-second time-out)
Danny Ainge: What's wrong with you, man? You're killing us.
(Meanwhile, the Nerdlucks opened up the coat)
Nawt: Let him in. Open up.
Blanko: Open.
(Pound got Charles Barkley's talent into the basketball)
BUPKUS: Wow. He did it.
(When Pound got out of the basketball, it was glowing)
Pound: I got it. I got his talent.
Bupkus: All right.
Blanko: Super.
(The Phoenix Suns' coach sat Charles Barkley down)
Paul Westphal: Sit down, Chuck.
Charles: Man, I'm fine. I am fine.
Paul Westphal: No, no. I played you too many minutes.
Charles: But I'm not tired.
Paul Westphal: Go get the doctor.
(Patrick Ewing was making good progress on the court. However, Bang was up next as he went up inside of him, and took his talent as well)
Alonzo Mourning: What's up, man? You all right?
Patrick: Yeah.
Alonzo Mourning: You sure?
(His teammates were wondering if he was okay, and Patrick Ewing gave them an OK)
Alonzo Mourning: Come on, we're okay. You're okay. Come on, let's go.
(Patrick Ewing's teammates helped him to the free-throw line as the referee passed him the ball, and it hit him on his head)
NBA Referee: Come on, Patrick, it's showtime.
(He passed Patrick Ewing the ball again)
MAN: What's wrong with him?
(When Patrick finally caught the ball and attempted to shoot it, it didn't even go to the hoop, let alone going near the rim or even the backboard. Instead, the basketball ended up hitting the popcorn guy in the bleachers, making him fall down. The Wilhelm scream is heard)
(INT. BEDROOM — MORNING. The next morning...)
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) In a shocking development, five NBA players have been placed on the disabled list in the last 24 hours, all suffering from the same mysterious ailment.
(Walter walked into the room, wrapped in the towel)
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) Whatever this mystery is, it affects the player's coordination.
(He watched the news about the NBA players)
Walter: Yeah, I'm watching it right now.
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) Watch Patrick Ewing.
Walter: Put your mom on the phone.
(On TV, Patrick Ewing is hit on the head by the ball)
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) It wasn't just in New York.
Walter: Hey, baby. How you doing?
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) Check out the highlights.
Walter: You watching TV?
(He saw that Muggsy Bogues is fumbling all over the court as if he's a football player fumbling the pigskin)
Charlotte Coach: What the hell is going on?
(Next, Larry Johnson sits on a bench)
Charlotte Coach: You gonna be all right?
Larry: I'm ready, coach. All right.
(He tries to drink but there's no water)
Walter: Looks like I retired just in time.
(Suddenly, Walter heard a knock at the door)
Walter: All right, baby, gotta go. I'll call you later, okay? Love you. Bye. It's open!
(The door opened, and Tulip peeked his head through the door)
Tulip: Come on, tomorrow's game time. Get your Hanes on. Lace up your Nikes. Grab your Wheaties and your Gatorade and we'll pick up a Big Mac on the way.
Ahmad Rashad: (On TV) Now we take you live to the Forum in Los Angeles, where the Lakers are refusing to take the court.
(INT. LOCKER ROOM, GREAT WESTERN FORUM — DAY. The Los Angeles Lakers were refusing to dress up in their locker room because of what happened to the other NBA players over the past two days. They were about to leave until their coach stopped them)
Del Harris: Guys, we gotta get dressed. We got a game in five minutes. I mean, we're talking about a huge fine here.
Vlade Divac: No, we can't go in the locker room.
Del Harris: Oh, man.
Cedric Ceballos: You heard what happened to Barkley and Ewing. There's germs in there.
Del Harris: Cedric, that was in New York, 3000 miles away.
Cedric Ceballos: Bacteria can travel faster than the speed of light.
Vlade Divac: It could be Invasion of the Body Snatchers.
PLAYER: Yeah, could be.
Del Harris: Alright, just dress in the hallway.
PLAYERS: Okay.
(The Lakers all put gas masks on their faces as they began to change into their uniforms for the upcoming game)
(INT. RED ROCKET'S PIZZA POT — DAY. Inside Red Rocket's Pizza Pot, a spatula came down on a bell with a DING!)
Buford: Order up!
(The cook was serving up pizza and cookies with lightning speed, and Tiana was carrying them to customers just as fast)
Virgil: Another coffee here, chere.
Tiana: Coming right up, Virgil.
Georgia: Hey, Tiana!
(Tiana turned to see a group of her friends sitting at a table nearby)
Tiana: Morning, Georgia.
Georgia: Y'all going out dancing tonight. Care to join us?
Violet: Yeah, come on. Live a little.
Customer: Come on, Tiana. You can dance wit. It's Mardi Gras.
(Tiana passed a plate to a customer)
Tiana: You know I have got two left feet. Besides, I'm... You need a napkin, sweetheart? I'm going to work a double shift tomorrow. Here are your hotcakes. You know, so I can...
Georgia: So you can save for your restaurant. I know, I know. Girl, all you ever do is work.
(BELL DINGS)
BUFORD: Order up!
Tiana: Maybe next time.
VIOLET: I told y'all she wouldn't come.
(She hurried to grab the next order)
(Buford looked through the pickup window)
Buford: Are you talking about that dang restaurant again?
Tiana: Buford, your eggs are burning.
Buford: Oh! You never going to get enough for the down payment.
(Tiana put a few more plates on her tray)
Tiana: I'm getting close.
Buford: Yeah, how close?
Tiana: Where are my flapjacks?
Buford: (LAUGHING) You got about as much chance of getting that restaurant as I do of winning the Kentucky Derby! Saddle me up! It's post time. Giddyup, giddyup.
(Just then, Big Daddy walked into the diner)
Tiana: Morning, Mr. LaBouff.
Big Daddy: Good morning, Tiana.
Tiana: Congratulations on being voted King of the Mardi Gras parade.
Big Daddy: Caught me completely by surprise, for the fifth year in a row! (LAUGHING) Now, how about I celebrate with...
Tiana: Beignets? Got me a fresh batch just waiting for you.
Big Daddy: Well, keep them coming till I pass out.
(Charlotte (now 18) bursts into the diner all aflutter)
Charlotte: Oh, Tia! Tia, Tia, Tia, did you hear the news?
Tiana: Hey, Lottie.
Charlotte: Tell her. Oh, tell her, Big Daddy!
Big Daddy: Oh, yeah, Prince Naveen…
(Charlotte grabbed the newspaper and showed the photograph to her friend)
Charlotte: Prince Naveen of Maldonia is coming to Pixie Anaheim! (SCREAMING) Oh! Isn't he the bee's knees? Tell her what you did, Big Daddy. Tell her!
Big Daddy: Well, I invited…
Charlotte: Big Daddy invited the prince to the masquerade ball tonight! (EXCLAIMS) Tell her what else you did, Big Daddy. Go on.
Big Daddy: And he's staying…
Charlotte: And he's staying…
(Big Daddy put a beignet in Charlotte's mouth)
Big Daddy: And he's staying in our house as my personal guest.
(Charlotte nodded eagerly, only momentarily silenced by the beignet)
Tiana: Oh, Lottie, that's swell. A little word of advice. My mama always said, "The quickest way to a man's heart is through his stomach."
(Charlotte glanced at Big Daddy enjoying his beignet)
Charlotte: Ah! That's it!
(She yanked the beignet out of Big Daddy's hand and examining it)
Big Daddy: What just happened?
(Charlotte threw her arms around Tiana's neck)
Charlotte: Tia! You are a bona fide genius. I’m going to need about 500 of your man-catching beignets for my ball tonight.
(Charlotte reached into Big Daddy's pocket and pulled out a wad of cash)
Charlotte: Excuse me, Daddy.
(She handed the money to Tiana with a smile on her face)
Charlotte: Will this many cover it?
(She was asking for a lot. Tiana had to make dozens and dozens of her delicious beignets before tomorrow's ball)
(But even though she was surprised by Charlotte's request, Tiana did not hesitate for a second to agree to do the work. She was thrilled. It was more money than she could earn in six months of tips–and she would be earning it without any handouts from anybody)
Tiana: (is she upset?) This should cover it just fine, Lottie. (thrilled) This is it! I'm getting my restaurant!
Charlotte: (WHOOPS) Tonight my prince is finally coming. And I sure as heck ain't letting him go!
(Tiana watched as Charlotte and Big Daddy left the diner. Overwhelmed, she turned slowly as she slid the money into her pocket. Finally, she could put the down payment on her restaurant!)
(Dr. Facilier, who had slipped unnoticed into the diner, now lowered the edge of his newspaper and glanced at Tiana. Lurking silently at a corner table, he had overheard every single word of the conversation between Charlotte and Tiana)
(With his wicked thoughts spinning, he shared a sinister smile with his shadow. An evil plan began to come together in Dr. Facilier's mind. He was going to snare a prince)
(EXT. COTTAGE — DAY. As soon as she could, Tiana made an appointment to meet two old men STATLER & WALDORF selling the cottage. She remembered visiting the place with her father when she was little and talking about how grand a restaurant it would be)
(As Tiana waited outside the old building, Statler and Waldorf, lifted the FOR SALE sign out of the ground and got into their car)
Tiana: Everything looks peachy-keen, Statler and Waldorf.
Statler: We'll have all the paperwork ready to sign, first thing after Mardi Gras.
Tiana: I'll do you one better. Why don't I sign them tonight when I see y'all at the LaBouffs' masquerade ball?
WALDORF: You drive a hard bargain, Tiana!
(They heckle and drove off. Tiana gazed at the exterior of the old cottage. This was going to take a lot of work, but she couldn't have been happier)
Eudora: (O.S.) Table for one, please?
(Tiana turned to to voice behind her. It was Eudora)
Tiana: Oh! Mama.
(She could tell that Eudora was proud and had shown up to support her friend. And most importantly, Eudora approached Tiana holding a well-seasoned cooking pot with a bow on it)
Eudora: Here's a little something to help you get started.
Tiana: Daddy's gumbo pot.
(Tears welled up in Tiana's eyes as she thought about all the times she had cooked with her father, James. This restaurant was the dream she had shared with him, and she wished he were here)
Eudora: I know.
(TINKER BELL SNIFFLES)
Eudora: I miss him, too. Well, now. Hurry up and open the door!
(INT. COTTAGE — DAY. Tiana and Eudora smiled and peeked inside. It looked bad, but Tiana saw the potential)
Tiana: Just look at it, mama. Doesn't it just make you want to cry?
Eudora: Yes.
(Tiana walked over the loose floorboards)
Tiana: The maitre d' is going to be right where you're standing. Oh! And over here, a gourmet kitchen! And hanging from the ceiling, a big old crystal chandelier!
Eudora: (CHUCKLING) You're your daddy's daughter, all right. He used to go on and on about this old cottage, too. Babycakes, I'm sure this place is going to be just wonderful, but it's a shame you are working so hard.
Tiana: But how can I let up now when I'm so close? I got to make sure all Daddy's hard work means something.
Eudora: Tiana. Your father may not have gotten the place he always wanted, but he had something better. He had love. And that's all I want for you, sweetheart, to meet your Prince Charming and dance off into your happily ever after.
(But Tiana didn't understand her mother's words)
Tiana: Mama! I don't have time for dancing.
(SINGING) That's just gonna have to wait a while
Eudora: How long we talking about here?
Tiana: Ain't got time for messing around
And it's not my style
Eudora: I want some grandkids!
Tiana: This old town can slow you down
People taking the easy way
But I know exactly what I'm doing
Getting closer and closer every day
(She had big dreams for this restaurant, and she could see it all in front of her, beyond the rotting wood, cobwebs, and dust)
Tiana: And I'm almost there, I'm almost there
People down here think I'm crazy, but I don't care
Trials and tribulations, I've had my share
There ain't nothing gonna stop me now cause I'm almost there
I remember daddy told me: Fairytales can come true
You gotta make them happen, it all depends on you"
So I work real hard each and every day
Now things for sure are going my way
Just doing what I do
Look out boys, I'm coming through
And I'm almost there, I'm almost there
People gonna come here from everywhere
And I'm almost there, I'm almost there
(Then Eudora got to work helping Tiana fix up her bed. Tiana looked at the run-down cottage, and for only a moment, it glittered just like the supper club in the picture James had given her. She was more determined than ever to make her dream come true–and she did not need a Prince Charming for that!)
Tiana: There's been trials and tribulations
You know I've had my share
But I've climbed the mountain, I've crossed the river
And I'm almost there, I'm almost there,
I'm almost there!
(EXT. NEW ORLEANS SQUARE, DISNEYLAND PARK — DAY. The crowds on the streets were starting to come to life. The lights and music dazzled Prince Naveen. Lawrence tried to keep up, but the bags was slowing him down, and he kept losing Naveen in the noisy bustle)
Lawrence: Excuse me!
(He bumps into people)
Citizen: You need a hand there, buddy?
(Lawrence heard a street band playing loudly in the distance. He spotted a large group gathered on a corner and pushed his way through. In the center of the crowd, Naveen was playing his ukulele and dancing up a storm)
Naveen: (EXCLAIMING)
(Lawrence, sweating and exhausted, moved closer to Naveen)
Lawrence: Sire! I've been looking for you everywhere.
Naveen: What a coincidence, Lawrence. I have been avoiding you everywhere.
Lawrence: We're going to be late for the masquerade.
Naveen: Listen, Lawrence, listen.
(He hears jazz music)
Naveen: It's jazz. It's jazz music. It was born here. Is beautiful, no? Dance with me, fat man. Stay loose, Lawrence!
Lawrence: We supposed to be at the LaBouff estate by now!
Naveen: Yes, yes, yes, but first I buy everyone here a drink!
Lawrence: With what? At this point you have two choices, woo and marry a rich young lady or get a job!
(He points at the glow light stick vendor)
Naveen: All right. Fine. But first we dance!
(He dances with Lawrence)
Lawrence: No, this is idiocy!
Naveen: For someone who cannot see his feet, you're very light on them!
(He spun Lawrence in the air. Lawrence twirled around and stumbled, landing with his head lodged squarely inside a tuba)
Naveen: Is perfect! You finally got into the music. Do you get my joke? Because your head is... It's in the tuba.
Lawrence: (inside tuba) Get me out!
Naveen: All right. Hold on. One...
(He yanked on the short man's legs. Lawrence's head popped out of the tuba and he and the prince went sprawling to the sidewalk)
Lawrence: How degrading! I've never been so humiliated.
(A dark shadow suddenly fell over Lawrence and Prince Naveen. The frog prince looked up and squinted. Dr. Facilier bowed)
Facilier: Gentlemen! (GREETS IN FRENCH) A tip of a hat from Dr. Facilier. How y'all doing?
(Like a stage magician's trick, a business card suddenly appeared in Dr. Facilier's fingers)
(Prince Naveen stared wide-eyed at it. The card read:)
Naveen: "Tarot readings, charms, potions. Dreams made real." (EXCLAIMS)
(Dr. Facilier motioned for Naveen to follow her down a dark alley)
Facilier: Were I a betting man, and I'm not, I stay away from games of chance…
LAWRENCE: Sire!
Facilier: I'd wager I'm in the company of visiting royalty.
Naveen: Lawrence. Lawrence! This remarkable gentleman has just read my palm.
Lawrence: Or this morning's newspaper. (SOFTLY) Sire! This chap is obviously a charlatan. I suggest we move on to a less...
(Dr. Facilier shot Lawrence a withering glance, and Lawrence felt her spine turn to jelly)
Facilier: (SINGING) Don't you disrespect me, little man!
Don't you derogate or deride!
You're in my world now, not your world
(Dr. Facilier waved his cane toward his shop. A glowing purple sign suddenly lit the alley. Dr. Facilier, his face long and hollow in the pale purple light, unlocked the weathered door and invited them inside)
Facilier: And I got friends on the other side!
(Lawrence and Prince Naveen thought they heard voices–ghostly voices–coming from inside the shop. But the frog prince eagerly stepped in. He was too excited by the wonder of it all to be cautious–and that was what worried Lawrence)
Shadow Demons: He's got friends on the other side
(INT. VOODOO EMPORIUM — DAY. Inside Dr. Facilier's dimly lit shop, Lawrence and Prince Naveen made their way past dusty shelves lined with mysterious jars that contained unidentifiable liquids and gruesome objects. Lawrence and Prince Naveen started to feel uncomfortable. The room was creepy and dark, filled with strange collections of candles, cards, and other weird items. Dr. Facilier's shadow slipped along the wall and quickly took their hats as unsettling sounds drifted through the room)
(Naveen and Lawrence exchanged a nervous glance)
Facilier: That's an echo, gentlemen. Just a little something we have here in Anaheim. A little parlor trick, don't worry.
(Then, with a wave of his hand, light from an old lamp on a round table illuminated the room. Dr. Facilier sat his guests down. He showed off his potions and bizarre masks on the wall as the ghostly voices began a quiet song)
Facilier: Sit down at my table
Put your minds at ease
If you relax it will enable me to do
Anything I please
I can read your future
I can change it around some, too
I'll look deep into your heart and soul
(You do have a soul, don't you, Lawrence?)
Make your wildest dreams come true!
I got voodoo, I got hoodoo,
I got things I ain't even tired!
And I got friends on the other side!
Shadow Demons: He's got friends on the other side!
(With a snap of his fingers, a deck of cards appeared in Dr. Facilier's hand. The doctor fanned the cards enticingly and told Lawrence and Naveen to pick three each)
Facilier: The cards, the cards, the cards will tell
The past, the present, and the future as well!
The cards, the cards, just take three
Take a little trip into your future with me!
(Naveen was delighted. They were going to have their fortunes read!)
(Ooh, ooh)
(Dr. Facilier turned over Prince Naveen's first card and looked at it carefully. Naveen was mesmerized as Dr. Facilier told him that he came from a long line of royalty. The frog prince nodded eagerly. Dr. Facilier turned over the second card and shook his head sorrowfully. The card showed a royal who loved the good life but had no money)
Facilier: Now you, young man, are from across the sea
You come from two long lines of royalty
(I'm a royal myself, on my mother's side.)
Your lifestyle's high, but your funds are low
You need to marry a li'l honey whose daddy got dough!
Mom and Dad cut you off, huh playboy?
Naveen: Yeah, sad but true.
(Dr. Facilier leaned back in his chair and considered the problem. Then, just for a moment, the cards in the deck turned green. A twinkle lit in Dr. Facilier's dark eyes as he told Naveen that there would be lots of green in their future. The frog prince was thrilled at the thought of regaining his wealth)
Facilier: Now y'all are gotta get hitched, but hitching ties you down. You just wanna be free, hop from place to place. But freedom takes green!
(Dr. Facilier turned over Prince Naveen's last card. It showed a prince living green from work and happy all the time. It was everything Naveen wanted!)
Facilier: It's the green, it's the green, it's the green you need
And when I looked into your future
It's the green that I seen!
(The grinning witch doctor turned to Lawrence)
Facilier: On you little man, I don't want to waste much time
You been pushed around all your life
(Dr. Facilier flipped over the valet's first two cards. Lawrence stared as Dr. Facilier told him that the cards showed he'd been bossed and pushed around all his life)
Facilier: You been pushed around by your mother and your sister and your brother.
And if you was married, you'd be pushed around by your wife
(Lawrence glared at the frog prince)
(With a gleam in his eye, Dr. Facilier turned the last card for Lawrence to see. It showed a much brighter future for him–with the valet as the royal and Prince Naveen carrying his luggage. Lawrence was suddenly very excited)
Facilier: But in your future, the you I see
Is exactly the man you always wanted to be!
(Dr. Facilier stood and held out his bony hand. Lawrence jumped to his feet and shook it hard)
Facilier: Shake my hand. Come on, boys. Won't you shake a poor sinner's hand?
(Prince Naveen hesitated for a moment, but then Dr. Facilier flashed another smile, and the frog prince shook hands, as well. The deal was sealed. Dr. Facilier would bring "green" to Prince Naveen and respect to Lawrence)
Facilier: Yes!
(The room suddenly came alive with the sound of drums. All the masks on the walls seemed to be moving as Dr. Facilier reached his hand into one of the larger masks and pulled out a strange little talisman. Dr. Facilier's terrifying shadow danced on its own against the wall. The voices in the room were singing wildly now)
Facilier: Are you ready?
Shadow Demons: Are you ready?
Facilier: Are you ready?
Transformation central!
Shadow Demons: Transformation central!
Facilier: Reformation central!
Shadow Demons: Reformation central!
Facilier: Transmogrification central!
Can you feel it?
(Prince Naveen sat frozen as he felt the room begin to spin. Two powerful spirit snakes wrapped around his arms and held him tight as Dr. Facilier brushed the talisman against the frog's fingertips. To Naveen's horror, the room spun faster and faster, and the ghostly voices grew louder and louder. What was happening?)
Facilier: You're changing, you're changing, you're changing, all right!
I hope you're satisfied
But if you ain't, don't blame me!
You can blame my friends on the other side!
(Ha ha ha!)
Shadow Demons: You got what you wanted
But you lost what you had!
Ohh...
All: Hush...
(EXT. BALLROOM, LABOUFF ESTATE — NIGHT. The masquerade ball was just getting under way. The estate was aglow with colored lanterns and party balloons. Tiana, wearing a medical costume, was busy serving beignets to the happy guests. All of Anaheim was there, decked out in their most lavish costumes)
(Big Daddy, dressed as a Roman emperor, found his way to Tiana's serving table. He noticed that someone else had gotten to it first)
Big Daddy: Senator Johnson. Hey, Jimmy. I hope you're leaving some of them beignets for your constituents.
(The two guys walked off)
Tiana: Here you go, piping hot.
(Charlotte's bloodhound, STELLA, put her paws up on the table)
Tiana: Stella. Excuse me. Stella, no. No.
Stella: (WHINING)
(Tiana remembered the day years earlier when Big Daddy had pulled the tiny puppy out of his kennel and had given her to a surprised Charlotte)
Tiana: (LAUGHS) Okay, but just one.
(She tosses the dog a beignet)
(Not far away, Charlotte anxiously paced among the partygoers. She was dressed as a fairy-tale princess, complete with a diamond crown. She was ignoring all her guests as her eyes searched the dance floor for her prince)
(Travis asked her if she'd care to dance)
Travis: But, Miss Charlotte, you said "later," two hours ago.
Charlotte: Travis, when a woman says "later," she really means "not ever." Now run along. There are plenty of young fillies dying for you to waltz them into a stupor.
(Charlotte escorted Travis to the dance floor, then drifted toward Tiana's table)
Charlotte: Give me the napkins, quick!
Tiana: What on earth for?
(Charlotte tried to discreetly blot her armpits)
Charlotte: I swear, I'm sweating like a sinner in church.
(She'd waited a few days and the prince had not arrived)
Charlotte: Tia, it's getting to be so late!
Tiana: There's still a few stragglers.
Charlotte: It's just not fair! My prince is never coming!
Tiana: Now, Lottie...
Charlotte: I never get anything I wish for!
(Charlotte tore the crown off her head and dashed up toward the door)
Tiana: Lottie, wait! Just calm down. Take a deep...
(Tiana caught up with Charlotte on the balcony)
Charlotte: Maybe I just got to wish harder.
(She is choking back her tears)
(She looked up at the Evening Star, closed her eyes tight, and wished as hard as she could)
Charlotte: Please, please, please, please, please, please!
Tiana: Lottie, you can't just wish on a star and expect things...
(The sound of a trumpet suddenly interrupted them)
PAGE: Ladies and gentlemen! His Royal Highness, Prince Naveen!
(Charlotte and Tiana turned to see the curtains part as a tall, handsome man dressed in a striking uniform walked into the stage. Tiana could not believe what she was seeing. Was Charlotte's wish coming true?)
(As for Charlotte, it all made sense to her. She quickly put her crown on and fixed her makeup. She whistled for a spotlight and tossed a handful of glitter around herself)
(Prince Naveen noticed her immediately. The shimmering spotlight followed Charlotte as she eagerly rushed down the grand staircase. The frog prince took her gloved hand when she reached the last step and, in a cloud of billowing pink silk, swept her onto the dance floor)
(Tiana returned to her beignet stand and watched as they magically glided over the marble floor. She sighed)
(An old man dressed in a horse costume approached her)
Statler: Evening Tiana.
(Then a voice came from the back end of the horse)
Statler: Marvelous party.
Tiana: Good evening, Statler and Waldorf.
Waldorf: Fine-smelling beignets.
Tiana: Going to be the house specialty once I sign those papers y'all brought.
Statler: Yes. About that.
Waldorf: You were outbid.
Tiana: What?
Statler: A fellow came in, offered the full amount in cash. Unless you can top his offer by Wednesday...
Waldorf: You can kiss that place goodbye.
Tiana: You know how long it took me to save that money?
(Statler removed his horse head and took a beignet from the table)
Statler: Exactly! Which is why a little woman of your background would have had her hands full trying to run a big business like that. No, you're better off where you're at.
Tiana: Now, wait a minute. We had an agreement.
(Waldorf at the back end stuffed at least a dozen beignets into his costume)
Waldorf: Love those beignets, though.
(They heckle and began to trot away)
Tiana: Now, hold on there!
(She reaches out to grasp the horse's tail, trying to get the old men to talk to her)
Tiana: You come back... (YELPS)
(But the tail came off in her hand)
(She staggered backward and fell onto her serving table. As the table collapsed, trays of beignets crashed to the ground, ruining Tiana's dress and what was left of her good mood)
(All atwitter, Charlotte left the dance floor)
Charlotte: Tia! Time to hit Prince Charming with those man-catching...
(Then she noticed the broken table and poor Tiana's stained dress)
Charlotte: What happened?
Tiana: I... I just...
Charlotte: You poor dear. (To Prince Naveen) Oh, Prince Naveen, I'll be right back, sugar! (To Tiana) I got just the dress for you.
(INT. BEDROOM, CHARLOTTE'S MANSION — NIGHT. Charlotte pulled out a beautiful gown for her friend)
(Tiana stepped behind a screen and began to change. Charlotte was bubbling with excitement about meeting the prince of her dreams at last)
Charlotte: Tia, honey, did you see the way he danced with me? A marriage proposal can't be far behind. Thank you, Evening Star! You know, I was starting to think that wishing on stars was just for babies and crazy people.
(Tiana emerged from behind the screen wearing the new dress. Charlotte gasped. Tiana looked stunning–like a princess!)
Charlotte: Look at you. Aren't you just as pretty as a magnolia in May? Seems like only yesterday we were both little girls dreaming our fairy tale dreams, and tonight they're finally coming true.
(Charlotte quickly adjusted her dress and prepared to go back to the party. She didn't notice the sad expression on Tiana's face. Her dream had just been crushed)
Charlotte: Well, back in the fray. Wish me luck! Oh, Naveen...
(Disappointed with her own luck, Tiana picked up her soiled dress and pulled out the flyer for the restaurant before she wandered out to the balcony)
Tiana: (SINGING) Almost
Almost There
People would have come from everywhere
I was almost there.
(She looked up at the Evening Star)
Tiana: I cannot believe I'm doing this.
(She closed her eyes and folded her hands)
Tiana: Please, please, please.
(Sighing, she realized how ridiculous it was to wish on a star. She opened her eyes and blinked hard. A tiny frog was sitting on the railing, staring at her)
Tiana: Very funny.
(If this were some silly joke about wishing on a star and then having a frog prince appear, ready to be turned back into a human)
Tiana: So what now? I reckon you want a kiss?
(A sly look came over the frog's face)
Naveen: Kissing would be nice, yes?
(The frog had just spoken! In English! Tiana jumped and screamed. She staggered back into the bedroom, knocking over shelves of toys and storybooks)
Naveen: I'm sorry! I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I did not mean to scare you. I...
(Tiana grabbed a stuffed bear)
Naveen: Wait, no, no, no! Wait. Hold on a sec...
(She hurled the bear at him, barely missing him)
Naveen: You have a very strong arm, Princess.
(Tiana grabbed another stuffed animal, ready to attack)
Naveen: Okay, please! Put the monkey down.
(Tiana grabbed a storybook. This time, she hit her mark)
Tiana: Stay back or I'll...
(Naveen hopped onto the bed)
Naveen: Please, please, please. (GRUNTS) Oh, wow. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Prince Naveen
(The book slammed down on top of the frog)
Naveen: (WEAKLY) of Maldonia.
Tiana: Prince? But I didn't wish for any... Hold on. If you're the prince, then who was that waltzing with Lottie on the dance floor?
Naveen: All I know is one minute I am a prince, charming and handsome, cutting a rug, and then the next thing I know, I am tripping over these.
(He lifted a green webbed feet. Tiana held up the book, ready to slam it down again)
Naveen: Wait, wait, wait, wait! I knew this story!
(He sees the title on the cover)
(NAVEEN EXCLAIMS IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
(Tiana looked at the cover. It was the fairy tale about the girl who had kissed a frog and turned him into a prince)
Tiana: The Frog Prince?
(Tiana had loved that story–right up until the kissing part. Who would kiss a frog?)
Naveen: Yes! My mother had the servants read this to me every night. Yes, yes, yes! This is exactly the answer! You must kiss me.
Tiana: Excuse me?
Naveen: You will enjoy, I guarantee. All women enjoy the kiss of Prince Naveen. Come. We pucker.
(The frog's throat suddenly inflated, making him look ridiculous)
Naveen: That's new.
Tiana: Look, I'm sorry. I'd really like to help you, but I just do not kiss frogs.
Naveen: Wait a sec, but on the balcony, you asked me.
Tiana: I didn't expect you to answer!
Naveen: But you must kiss me. Look, besides being unbelievably handsome, okay, I also happen to come from a fabulously wealthy family. Surely I could offer you some type of reward, a wish I could grant perhaps? Yes?
Tiana: Just one kiss?
Naveen: Just one, unless you beg for more.
(She had worked so hard to get this far. She just needed little bit more money to open the restaurant of her dreams. It might be like a loan that she would pay back)
Tiana: (EXCLAIMING IN DISGUST) (SOFTLY) Okay, Tiana, you can do this. You can do this. Just a little kiss. Just a little kiss. Okay.
(She leaned in and gave the frog a small kiss. Tiana suddenly found herself swirling in a cloud of sparks and misty smoke. The last thing she heard was the pop of a magical POOF!)
(When Tiana opened her eyes, all she could see was blue silk–lots of blue silk. She was somehow under a mountain of it)
Naveen: (EXCLAIMS)
(She found her way out and glanced up at the frog, who was on the dresser)
TIANA: You don't look that much different, but how did you get way up there? And how did I get way down here in all this...
(Tiana turned and suddenly saw herself in Charlotte's mirror)
Tiana: (SCREAMING)
(Her reflection showed a green human squatting on a blue silk gown! Instead of the frog becoming a human prince, Tiana had become a frog!)
Naveen: Easy, Princess. Princess, do not panic!
Tiana: What did you do to me? I'm green and I'm slimy!
Naveen: No! No, no, no, that is not slime.
Tiana: What?
Naveen: You are secreting mucus.
Tiana: You... You...
(She jumped onto the bed and struggled with Naveen. The two of them tumbled right out the bedroom window)
(EXT. BALLROOM, LABOUFF ESTATE — NIGHT. They landed on a drum in the orchestra below. The drummer hit the cymbal, and Tiana and Naveen were catapulted into the air. They sailed over the heads of the partygoers and down the back of Charlotte's ball gown)
Charlotte: (EXCLAIMING)
(The two frogs slid down her spine. She started to squirm. Big Daddy saw Charlotte wiggle, and shake around the dance floor)
(Then everyone saw the two frogs)
(Big Daddy called to the bloodhound)
Big Daddy: Hey, Stella! Get them frogs!
Naveen: Run!
Tiana: I can't run. I'm a frog!
Naveen: Then hop!
(He grabbed Tiana and they leaped onto the huge banquet table)
Naveen: Down, boy. Down, monster dog!
(Stella barreled through the crowd)
NAVEEN: Look out! Out of the way!
TIANA: Oh, no!
(They hopped across the silver trays of food)
Tiana: Where are we going?
Naveen: Excuse me!
TIANA: I can't see a thing!
NAVEEN: Neither can I!
(Naveen noticed the balloons decorating the lawn. He quickly a handful of balloon strings and untied them)
Tiana: Wait! Stella!
Naveen: Going up!
Tiana: Stella, it's me, Tiana!
Stella: Tiana?
(Stella jumped after them but she missed. She landed on the table, sending the cake flying and it landed on Statler and Waldorf)
Tiana: Stella just talked to me. The dog just spoke to me!
Naveen: You know, if you're going to let every little thing bother you, it's going to be a very long night!
(From behind a statue on the LaBouff estate, Dr. Facilier glared up at the sky. Then he noticed a man running to the hotel's bachelor quarters. It was Prince Naveen–the man who had just been dancing with Charlotte–except that the guy was really Lawrence)
(It was all part of Dr. Facilier's plan. He had made Lawrence look exactly like the prince. But there was a problem. The talisman Lawrence wore around his neck needed Naveen for its magic to work. Without the magic, Lawrence would look like Lawrence again)
(INT. BACHELOR QUARTERS, LABOUFF ESTATE — NIGHT. Lawrence rushed through the door and threw open a cabinet. He stared at an empty jar on the shelf)
Lawrence: (GASPS) Oh, dear?
(Suddenly, the shadow of Dr. Facilier loomed silently and ominously over him)
Lawrence: Oh! You're so quiet?
(Dr. Facilier glared at the empty jar in a rage. Naveen had escaped)
Facilier: You let him go!
Lawrence: The poor devil was gasping, so I loosen the lid ever so slightly.
(Dr. Facilier backed Lawrence into a corner as the shadow moved behind him menacingly—and then tripped him)
Shadow: (LAUGHING MALICIOUSLY)
Lawrence: How do I ever get tangled up in all this voodoo madness? I can't go through with this!
(He pulled off the talisman hanging around his neck, and in an instant, he looked like his true self again)
Lawrence: You wear this ghastly thing!
(He threw the talisman)
Facilier: Careful with that!
(He dove to catch the precious charm before it hit the floor)
Facilier: Anything happens to this, I'm going to be... Fun fact about voodoo, Larry. Can't conjure a thing for myself. Besides, you and I both know the real power in this world ain't magic. It's money! Buckets of it.
Lawrence: That's true.
Facilier: Aren't you tired of living on the margins while all those fat cats in their fancy cars don't give you so much as a sideway's glance?
Lawrence: Yes. I am.
(Dr. Facilier held up the talisman and explained that he needed Naveen to power its magic. He replaced the talisman around Lawrence's neck, and Lawrence transformed again into the image of the real Prince Naveen)
Facilier: All you got to do is marry Big Daddy's little princess, and we'll be splitting that juicy LaBouff fortune right down in the middle. 60-40, like I said.
Lawrence: Hmm. Yeah. But what about Naveen?
Facilier: Your little slip-up will be a minor bump in the road, so long as we've got the prince's blood in this.
(BOTH CHUCKLING)
Lawrence: Yes.
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — NIGHT. The two frogs floated over the dense bayou)
TIANA: Voodoo?
(A blue mist hung in the air)
Tiana: You mean to tell me this all happened because you were messing with the Shadow Man?
Naveen: He was very charismatic.
Tiana: (GROANS) It serves me right for wishing on stars. The only way to get what you want in this world is through hard work.
Naveen: Hard work? Why would a princess need to work hard?
Tiana: Huh? Oh! I'm not a princess. I'm a waitress.
Naveen: A waitress? Well, no wonder the kiss did not work. You lied to me!
Tiana: No, I... I never said I was a princess.
Naveen: You never said that you were a waitress! You... You were wearing a crown!
(Tiana rolled her eyes)
Tiana: It was a costume party, you spoiled little rich boy!
Naveen: Oh, yes? Well, the egg is on your face, all right? Because I do not have any riches.
Tiana: What?
Naveen: (LAUGHS) I am completely broke!
(Suddenly, they both heard the sound of balloons popping. Prince Naveen looked up)
Naveen: Uh-oh.
(Tree branches poked holes in the few remaining balloons he was holding. The two frogs screamed)
(Tiana fell facedown in the muck. Prince Naveen landed on top of her with a plop)
(Tiana raised her head. Her face was covered with gunk. She struggled to her feet and coughed. But that didn't stop her from continuing to argue)
Tiana: You said you were fabulously wealthy!
Naveen: No. My parents are fabulously wealthy, but they cut me off for being a...
(Naveen suddenly noticed a leech on his leg)
Naveen: Leech! Leech!
(To the tiny frog, the bloodsucker was enormous!)
(Tiana flicked the leech off the horrified prince)
Tiana: You're broke, and you had the gall to call me a liar?
(Naveen was about to answer when a huge catfish jumped out of the water and snatched the leech from the air. Both frogs screamed and scrambled away from the murky swamp and onto the muddy shore. Trying to catch his breath, Naveen leaned on a branch–and continued the argument)
Naveen: It was not a lie. I fully...
(Suddenly, the branch began to move)
(Tiana and Naveen looked up. Two beady eyes were staring down on them. They realized it wasn't a branch Naveen was leaning on. It was the leg of a heron–the biggest, hungriest bird either one had ever seen!)
Tiana: Run!
(Tiana dove at Naveen and knocked him out of the way a split second before the bird's big beak slammed down. The heron raced after them as the two little frogs ran for their lives)
Naveen: I fully intend to be rich again. Once I marry Miss Charlotte LaBouff. If she will have me.
Tiana: You're a prince?
Naveen: Obviously.
Tiana: She'll have you.
(The heron was about to scoop them up when Tiana and Naveen slid down a tree trunk that reached out over the water. The two soared through the air and landed on a floating log. Finally safe again, they watched in relief as the heron flew away into the blue mist of the bayou, apparently in search of another meal)
(Tiana looked at Naveen)
Tiana: All right, then. Once you two are married, you are going to keep your promise and get me my restaurant, right?
Naveen: Not so fast. I made that promise to a beautiful princess, not a cranky...
(He looked around and noticed something cutting through the water)
Naveen: Why are those logs moving?
(Tiana saw the V shapes)
TIANA: Those aren't logs.
(They were alligators! Hungry alligators)
Ian the Alligator: (CHUCKLES) I got dibs on the big one.
(Tiana and Naveen dove into the water just as the alligators snapped at the log they were sitting on–a log that was actually another alligator! No wonder the heron had flown away from them!)
(Under the water, Tiana paddled toward the roots of a hollow tree and swam inside. Jumping up inside the tree, she finally found a hole where she could look out. The alligators were still thrashing in search of frogs)
ALLIGATOR 1: Where'd they go?
ALLIGATOR 2: Where'd they go?
ALLIGATOR 3: I saw him first!
ALLIGATOR 4: Come here, you plump, tasty morsel!
ALLIGATOR 3: That's my tail, pea brain!
ALLIGATOR 1: Where did they go? Come on!
NAVEEN: Psst!
(Tiana heard a voice below her. She looked down at the bottom of the tree)
Naveen: Lower the vine.
Tiana: Find your own tree.
(The hissing alligators noticed Naveen on the bank)
Alligator 2: There he is!
Alligator 3: I see him! I see him!
(They began to swim toward him)
Naveen: All right. Look, look. Help me get out of this swamp, and once I marry Charlotte, I shall get you your restaurant.
Marlon the Alligator: You're going to taste so good basted and battered and fried!
(A vine dropped down in front of him. He climbed up to the dark hollow of the tree)
Naveen: Quick, quick! Pull me up!
ALLIGATOR 1: (LAUGHS) You can hop, but you can't hide.
ALLIGATOR 3: We got all night.
(The rain came down harder and lightning flashed. And inside the tree, the two frogs waited out the storm until they both drifted off to sleep)
NAVEEN: Well, waitress, looks like we're going to be here for a while. So we may as well get comfortable. (GROANS)
TIANA: Keep your slimy self away from me!
Naveen: I told you, it is not slime! It is mucus!
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA – MORNING. Soon the early rays of the morning sun began to light up the sky. The glow filtered into the tree where Naveen was still fast asleep)
(Tiana was outside building a raft. She had on thing on her mind–to get back to Pixie Anaheim and try to set things right)
TIANA: Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty! Gators are gone.
Naveen: What?
Tiana: We got to get back to Anaheim and undo this mess you got us into.
(Sleepily, Naveen hopped out of the tree and into the boat)
Naveen: I was not the one parading around with a phony-baloney tiara.
(Then he broke a twig off a nearby branch and constructed a makeshift ukulele)
Naveen: Music to paddle by.
Tiana: I could use a little help.
Naveen: Oh! I will play a little louder.
(Meanwhile, with the Muppets and the Nerdlucks ...)
(EXT. BASKETBALL COURT, MUPPET LAND — DAY. They were in the basketball court, practicing for their upcoming game. While Sweetums, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Lew Zealand, Beaker, Floyd, Scooter, Janice, Gonzo, Camilla, Pepé, Rizzo, Robin, the Swedish Chef, and Animal sat on the bench, Kermit jumped up, shot the basketball, and it went through the net. He caught the ball, and dribbled it to his fellow Muppets)
Kermit: Okay, okay, now, which one of you maroons has ever played basketball before?
(While Kermit asked this question to the Muppets, they just stared at the famous frog in confusion until Fozzie popped up from out of nowhere)
Fozzie: I have, coach. And there's an important strategic question I need to ask you.
Kermit: Yes, yes?
(Suddenly, a random fashion stage appeared right out of nowhere, and Fozzie began to model in various sports clothing, some of them for women. He later had a ridiculous purple and gold jersey on, one that was reminiscent to the Los Angeles Lakers)
Fozzie: What do you think? I'm kind of partial to purple and gold myself. It goes better with my coloring. A one, two, three, four.
(He then proceeded to show his clothes off to everyone, with Kermit rolling his eyes at him while Scooter suddenly came into the scene)
Scooter: Guys?
(Scooter then looked at Fozzie wearing the ridiculous basketball gear)
Scooter: Nice outfit, Fozzie. (To Kermit) The little aliens say it's their turn to, uh, use the court.
(Scooter then pointed to the Nerdlucks, who had their gymbag ready as they did some exercises, but they wasn't doing them too well)
Kermit: Sure, let the little pipsqueaks knock themselves out.
(They walked away with the Muppets)
(The Muppets were confident that they were going to win this basketball game, since the Nerdlucks looked short, weak, and talentless)
(They were ready to bring out their own secret weapon)
Gonzo: Too bad you can't practice getting taller, boys.
(He put a towel around his neck and caught up with the rest of the Muppets. As they walked away, a storm was starting, and dark clouds began to form in the sky)
(Bang and Pound held up the gymbag, and smiled deviously at each other. As they took out the glowing basketball, each of the Nerdlucks touched the ball, and felt a sudden burst of energy coming through them)
BUPKUS: Whoa!
NAWT: Ah!
(Their eyes opened wide as they began to transform. The Muppets (Scooter, Rowlf, Kermit, Fozzie, Gonzo, Lew Zealand) all heard them, and stopped, turning around to see what was with the Nerdlucks)
(Next, Pound felt some power coming to him, as he began to grow muscles, and become bigger. He seemed to have gotten Charles Barkley's powers)
(Blanko saw this, and noticed his shoes growing bigger, as he zoomed up to the top with a roar. He looked like Shawn Bradley, another NBA star that the Nerdlucks stole the talents from)
(Then, Bang began to have a dragon-like transformation as his spine began to grow, and, when his eyes began to change, he roared up into the air. He shared a physical resemblance to Patrick Ewing, who was one of the first players that lost their talent to the Nerdlucks)
(After a while, the Nerdlucks had all changed into big-time superstars as they had blue-and-yellow basketball jersey with the number "0" on them)
(All of the Muppets (Floyd, Scooter, Rowlf, Kermit, Lew Zealand, Gonzo, Fozzie, Dr. Teeth) looked in shock as they began to see the new, improved, and scarier Nerdlucks. They all looked like NBA stars, considering their new tall heights. The tall aliens all stood tall while posing threateningly, looking down at the Muppets. Blanko bent down to look at Scooter)
Blanko: Hey, little boy.
(He went up to Scooter's face)
Blanko: Boo.
Scooter: Aah!
(He looked down at himself, and began to blush)
Scooter: I wet myself.
(All of the aliens laughed at the gofer as Bang picked up the basketball that Kermit had earlier)
Bang: Time to play a little basketball.
(He threw the basketball hard at the ground, causing earthquake that went around Gonzo, Fozzie, Rowlf, Scooter, Dr. Teeth, Lew Zealand, and Floyd. As the earthquake occured, Lew Zealand grabbed Dr. Teeth and Floyd for protection as the others were still shivering)
Fozzie: Those little pipsqueaks just turned into superstars.
Scooter: They're monsters.
Gonzo: Superstars? Monsters? But that they're...
(Rowlf got in between Gonzo, Fozzie, and Scooter)
Rowlf: Suffering succotash. They're MonStars.
(Bang then popped the basketball as the MonStars walked away from the frightened Muppets as some buildings began to collapse)
Bang: Bye-bye.
(While the other Muppets were still shivering in fright, Kermit the Frog was the only one calm about this, and turned to the audience)
Kermit: Uh, I think we might need a little bit of help.
(INT. PIXIE DUST WELL, PIXIE DUST TREE – MORNING. Tink arrived early at the Pixie Dust Well. All the fairies began their day by lining up for their daily dose of dust. They were chatting while they waited. Tinker Bell ducked out of sight and waited to make an entrance)
FLOWER FAIRY 1: Get your pixie dust yet?
SPARROWMAN 1: Just did.
Sparrowman 2: Nice day for flying.
FLOWER FAIRY 1: Sure is.
(Tink saw Iridessa, Fawn, Rosetta, and Silvermist, who were waiting to receive their dust from Terence)
Terence: Here you go, Silvermist.
Silvermist: Thank you, Terence.
(Silvermist closed her eyes and held her nose when Terence poured the dust on her)
Silvermist: (nasal voice) I hope Tinker Bell is okay.
(Terence started to pour dust on Rosetta, but she politely stopped him and produced her own flower powder-puff. She delicately dipped it into the dust and gave herself a quick powder)
Rosetta: I know. That poor little sapling. She looked pretty wilted yesterday.
(Iridessa steps up for her dust)
Iridessa: Well, I wouldn't blame her if she stayed in bed all day.
(Tink listened from her hiding spot and smiled. Her friends were going to be so amazed when she told them about her great new plan!)
(The four fairies were indeed startled when Tinker Bell popped out)
Tinker Bell: Morning, girls!
(Terence was so surprised by Tink's perky manner that he dropped his dust ladle on Iridessa's head with a bonk!)
(Tink gave them a big smile)
ROSETTA: Tinker Bell?
FAWN: Tinker Bell?
(Tink did a fancy spin around a branch and then proudly landed on it)
Tinker Bell: Guess what? I've decided I'm not gonna be a tinker fairy anymore.
(Fawn and Iridessa looked shocked)
(Rosetta and Silvermist looked bewildered)
Rosetta: What?
Fawn: What?
Silvermist: What?
Iridessa: What?
Tinker Bell: Well, I was thinking. Why do I have to be a tinker? Just 'cause some silly hammer glowed? I mean, who's to say it wasn't some big mistake? Maybe I can just switch my talent.
Rosetta: Switch your talent? I don't know, Tinker Bell…
Tinker Bell: If you could teach me your talents, any of them, maybe I could show the Queen I can work with nature, too.
(A gnat landed on Tink's arm as she spoke, and she absentmindedly slapped at it. Fawn's eyebrows shot up in dismay)
Tinker Bell: And then she'd let me go to the mainland for spring.
Rosetta: Oh, Tinker Bell. That's just not how it works.
Fawn: Well, maybe she could.
Silvermist: She's right. She could.
(Iridessa wasn't buying it. Even her glow looked unsure)
Iridessa: Well, I've never heard of someone switching talents before.
Silvermist: She's right. Me, neither.
Tinker Bell: Look. You all do things that are beautiful and magical and important. But me, well, there's gotta be more to my life than just pots and kettles. All I'm asking is that you give me a chance.
(The group exchanged uneasy glances)
(Finally, Silvermist stepped forward and took Tink's hand)
Silvermist: I'll help you, Tinker Bell.
(Tink's heart soared)
Tinker Bell: Thank you, Sil.
Fawn: Me, too. Could be fun.
(Rosetta shrugged)
Rosetta: Well, first time for everything, I guess. What harm can come from trying?
(Iridessa was the last holdout. But Tinker Bell made her eyes so big and he smile so hopeful that Iridessa finally caved)
Iridessa: Well, I still think this is a bad idea.
(EXT. LILYPAD POND – DAY. Their first stop was Lilypad Pond, where a gentle stream ran through the grass-lined pool)
(Silvermist and Tink flew over the area, with Fawn, Rosetta, and Iridessa right behind them)
(Silvermist was trying to decide where to start)
SILVERMIST: So, for your first day of water fairy training, I could show you how to make ripples in the pond.
Tinker Bell: Okay!
Silvermist: Or teach you how to talk to the babbling brook.
Tinker Bell: Oh, that sounds fun, too.
Silvermist: Or wait, wait, wait. I got it, I got it, I got it!
(Silvermist somersaulted backward and hovered over a glistening spiderweb)
Silvermist: Dewdrops on spider webs!
(Tinker Bell hovered beside Silvermist. She was mesmerized by the web's intricacy. Beautiful drops of dew clung to the delicate strands like jewels)
(They gazed at the web together, and Silvermist wiped an admiring tear from her eye. Then she grabbed Tink's arm, eager to get started)
Silvermist: Come on. I'll show you how to do it.
(Fawn waved)
Fawn: Good luck, Tink!
(Rosetta gave her a wink)
Rosetta: You can do it!
(Iridessa just stood there, obviously waiting for something awful to happen. Fawn and Rosetta gave her an expectant look)
Iridessa: Oh, um… Go get 'em.
(Silvermist led Tink to the edge of the pond)
Silvermist: Just cup your hands like this, reach into the water, and…
(She lifts out a perfect dewdrop. She looked at Tink)
Silvermist: Okay, you've heard of a dewdrop?
(Tink nodded)
Silvermist: This is a don't drop.
(Her face was serious, but a mischievous glint sparkled in her eye)
(Tink just started at her. Had Silvermist made a joke? Should she laugh? But she looked se serious!)
Silvermist: That's water fairy humor.
Tinker Bell: It's good.
Silvermist: Come on.
(Silvermist took her dewdrop and flew to the web, with Tink behind her)
Silvermist: Okay, Tink, now, this next part can be a little tricky. It takes a very steady, delicate hand to…
(She carefully placed the drop on the web. The drop settled, clinging to the thin strand)
(Silvermist stared at Tink's empty hands)
Silvermist: Where's your dewdrop?
Tinker Bell: Oh. (embarrassed) (GIGGLES) Forgot my dewdrop.
(She had been so busy watching Silvermist, she had forgotten to try it herself)
(Tink flew back to the pond. Slowly and gently, she pulled up a beautiful sparkling drop)
Tinker Bell: Hey! I did
(Pop!)
(The dewdrop burst like a water balloon in her hands)
Tinker Bell: it.
(Silvermist appeared beside her)
Silvermist: Shake that one off. Shake it off. You can do this!
(Tink tried again. She carefully pulled out another drop and began to fly toward the web)
(Fawn cheered)
Fawn: That's it. That's it, Tink. You're doing it! You're…
(Pop!)
(The dewdrop burst again)
(Tink blew out her breath, lifting her bangs off her forehand. This was harder than it looked. She
dipped her hands back into the water)
Silvermist: Now, Tink, try to…
(Pop!)
Silvermist: No, no, sweetie, you need to…
(Pop!)
Silvermist: Well, maybe if you…
(Pop!)
(The other fairies winced as Tink failed again and again. They watched her flit back and forth, trying to get each dewdrop to the spiderweb before it burst)
Iridessa: Well, you have to admire her persistence.
SILVERMIST: Tinker Bell!
Iridessa: Although, sometimes hammers glow for a reason.
(Tink was so frustrated that she wanted to scream. But she refused to give up. She lifted another drop–a huge one. But instead of trying to carry it, she heaved it toward the web, hoping it would stick before it could burst)
(Silvermist, Iridessa, Fawn, and Rosetta watched the giant drop fly through the air and land smack-dab in the middle of the web with a satisfyingly wet splort!)
(But instead of sticking to the web, it bounced off and flew toward Silvermist and the other fairies. SPLAT! The dewdrop burst with so much force, it soaked all four of them and knocked Silvermist flat on her back)
(Tink hurried to help Silvermist to her feet. She was sorry her friends had gotten wet, but at least she was making some progress, The dewdrop had been on the web, if only for a second!)
(Silvermist shook the water off her wings. Her eyes darted around, finally resting on Iridessa)
Silvermist: You know, you always struck me as a light fairy kind of gal.
(Iridessa winced)
(Tink knew that Iridessa didn't think her plan was so great, but she still felt optimistic)
(Tink smiled happily, determined to ignore the fact that Iridessa was definitely not smiling back)
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – DAY. Meanwhile, at Tinkers' Nook, a tall pile of acorn pails waiting for handles grew higher and higher on Tinker Bell's worktable)
(The nature fairies would need every bucket, pail, and basket they could get their hands on. Clank and Bobble worked at a feverish pace. Clank was busy assembling the bodies of the pails and putting them on Tink's worktable so that she could make the handles. Bobble was weaving grass baskets)
(It was hard work. Noisy, too. Clank grabbed a couple of wads of flower fluff and stuffed them into his ears. Then he cheerfully began to chop the tops off acorns to make pails. CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP!)
Bobble: (SNGING) Here we go in the treasure…
(Bobble continued to weave dainty blades of grass into baskets. He glanced over at Tink's table)
Bobble: Have you seen Tink?
Clank: No, thank you. Not thirsty!
(CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP!)
Bobble: No, no. Not "drink," Tink!
Clank: Pink? I like purple meself!
(CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP! CHOP! WHAP!)
Bobble: Tink! Have you seen Tink?
Clank: What?
(Clank stopped, smelled his armpits, and scowled at Bobble)
Clank: I do not stink! Maybe it's you, eh?
(Clank finished his chopping and pulled the fluff from his ears. He looked over at Tink's worktable and noticed the glowing pile of pails to be mended)
Clank: Hey, have you seen Tink?
(Bobble fought the urge to strangle him and shook his head)
(A worried look fell across Clank's face)
Clank: Fairy Mary's gonna be cross.
(Bobble nodded)
Bobble: Aye, Clank. We'd better take some of this off Miss Bell's plate, so…
CLANK: All right, then.
(They flew over to Tink's table. Bobble took a pail from the top of the pile just as Clank pulled one from the bottom)
Bobble: No, no, no! Wait, wait, Clank!
(But it was too late)
(CRASH!)
(The entire pile came sliding down. Bobble's and Clank's tidy worktables were now covered with mountains of unmended pails)
(Unfortunately, Fairy Mary chose that very moment to come flying in)
Fairy Mary: What are… Will you two stop mucking about?
(Bobble and Clank each pointed a greasy finger at the other, hoping to escape a scolding)
Bobble: What Clank did was, he took it off…
Clank: Bobble told me that I should…
(But Fairy Mary's eagle eyes were on Tink's table, which was now completely clear)
Fairy Mary: I see Tinker Bell has got her work done, mysteriously. Where is she, anyway?
(Bobble exchanged a nervous look with Clank and they both began talking at once)
Bobble: Well, you see, she's…
(Clank talked right over him)
Clank: She went with Cheese to…
(But Cheese was in the corner of the workshop, and when he heard his name, he came right over. He clearly hadn't gone anywhere with anyone)
(Fairy Mary's eyes narrowed)
(Bobble worked desperately to save the situation)
Bobble: No, no. Clank means she went to get cheese, you see, the food, for Cheese the mouse…
Clank: Yes, the food, for Cheese the mouse.
Bobble: …because he was whining.
(Clank, quick to catch on for once, hurried to back up the story)
Clank: Yeah. Like a baby.
BOBBLE: Like a wittle, wee baby, there.
(Fairy Mary gave them a long stare that let them know they weren't fooling her. Then she took off)
(Bobble let out of sigh of relief. Fairy Mary had let them–and Tinker Bell–off the hook this time)
(Next time?)
(Well...Fairy Mary wasn't the most forgiving fairy in Anaheim)
(Bobble hoped Tinker Bell would come back and start tinkering again soon)
(They needed her)
(EXT. SUNFLOWER MEADOW – DUSK/NIGHT. Tink was happily unaware of the trouble back at the workshop. She was following Iridessa over a meadow full of sunflowers. Several light fairies played jump rope with a beam of light. Others used their glow to create butterfly-shaped puppets)
Iridessa: Okay, what can I teach you that's gonna do the least amount of damage?
(Iridessa wondered aloud)
Iridessa: Oh, I know. Follow me, Tinker Bell.
(She grabbed a bucket from a pile and handed it to Tink. Iridessa gestured at the setting sun)
Iridessa: The last light of day, it's the richest kind of all!
(The beautiful sun set slowly, and the light fairies held their buckets at the ready. Tink could sense their excitement)
Iridessa: Wait for it. Wait for it.
(Iridessa cautioned. A streak of warm pink spread across the sky)
Iridessa: Okay, and now!
Tinker Bell: Oh, wow.
(Beams of golden sunlight cascaded down over them. Iridessa cupped her hands to catch the light as Tink held up her bucket)
(When Tinker Bell looked down to examine her catch, the bucket was empty)
(Iridessa poured some light from her hands into Tink's bucket. It swirled, glimmering like gold)
Tinker Bell: It's incredible.
Iridessa: Now for the fun part.
Fawn: Do you think it's heavy?
Rosetta: No. It's light.
(EXAGGERATED LAUGH)
(She led Tink back to the sunflowers. When they reached one particular patch, Iridessa whistled)
(Dozens of fireflies with with unlit tails were sleeping beneath the sunflowers. But when Iridessa whistled, they woke up. They zigged and zagged around Iridessa and Tink like frisky puppies)
Iridessa: Okay, okay.
(Iridessa reached into Tink's bucket and pulled out some light. The fireflies bounced up and down. Iridessa tossed the light gently into the air and a few fireflies gleefully darted through it to illuminate themselves)
(Several unlit fireflies hovered at Tink's feet. They looked up with big, expectant eyes. Tink reached into the bucket and pulled out ... nothing)
(The fireflies whimpered)
(Tink felt almost as disappointed as they looked)
(Okay. It was time to try harder)
(Tink took a deep breath. She reached into the bucket again, concentrating as hard as she possibly could. When she was sure she had a handful of light, she whipped out her fingers and threw ... nothing!
(The fireflies darted off, searching for the light. They returned looking even sadder)
(Tink gritted her teeth. Her face contorted into a terrible grimace. She reached into the bucket with so much fury that the fireflies were frightened. They began to slink away)
Tinker Bell: Stay.
(The fireflies froze)
Iridessa: Here, Tink. Let me…
(She reached for the bucket)
(Tink held it away)
Tinker Bell: No! I almost got it.
(She just needed a little more practice. A little more time)
(Iridessa tried again)
Iridessa: If I just get you started…
(Tinker Bell's fingers arched from the effort)
Tinker Bell: This is impossible!
(She angrily threw the bucket to the ground)
(Bang!)
(Streaks of golden light shot out in every direction)
Iridessa: Look out!
(The fireflies snapped into action, chasing after the light while all the light fairies ducked for cover)
(One beam ricocheted off a rock and then came careening back. It hit Tink square in the backside)
Tinker Bell: (YELPS AND GASPS) Oh, no.
(Tink peeked at her behind. It glowed as brightly as the rear end of a firefly. How absolutely mortifying!)
(The fireflies stopped and stared. Then every single one of them zoomed straight toward Tink, clearly thinking she was the biggest, prettiest firefly they had ever seen)
Silvermist: I wonder how it's going.
(Tinker Bell flapped her wings and flew as fast as she could, trying to escape the lovesick swarm)
Iridessa: Fly, Tink, fly!
Silvermist: Uh-oh.
(But Tink couldn't wait for help. The last thing she heard as she sped away was:)
FAWN: We'll save you, Tink!
SILVERMIST: Bob and weave! Bob and weave!
ROSETTA: Cover your tushy!
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – MORNING. By the next morning, the glow had worn away, too)
(She sat in the workshop feeling glum while Clank and Bobble worked and murmured their song)
Bobble: We fiddle and fix.
Clank: Craft and create.
Bobble: Carve acorn buckets.
Clank: To hold flower paint.
Bobble: Preparing for spring.
CLANK: We do all this and more.
Bobble: Yes, being a tinker is never a bore!
Clank: Yes, being a tinker is never a bore!
(Tinker Bell was too unhappy to join in. She let out a long sigh as she did her best to mend a kettle)
(Fairy Mary came flying over and landed next to Tink)
FAIRY MARY: Tinker Bell, I'd like a word with you.
(Tink tried not to look as guilty as she felt)
Tinker Bell: Fairy Mary!
(She were just the fairy she had been hoping to meet)
Tinker Bell: See, I was on my deliveries, and it's actually kind of…
Fairy Mary: Save it. I know what you've been up to, missy.
(Tinker Bell froze)
Fairy Mary: And I had such high hopes for you.
(Fairy Mary looked genuinely disappointed. As she flew away, Tink began to feel even worse. She was just trying to be the best fairy she could be. So why did Fairy Mary have to make her feel so guilty about it?)
(Tinker Bell glared at the litter of pots and pans on her worktable)
Bobble: You'd do well to listen to her…
(Tinker Bell demanded bitterly)
Tinker Bell: Why? So I can do this my whole life? I don't wanna be just a stupid tinker!
(Clank and Bobble looked shocked...and hurt)
(Tink saw their stricken faces and began to stutter an apology, trying to take the words back)
Tinker Bell: No, no, not that you guys are… I didn't mean that… Guys, I wasn't…
(But the damage was done. Both of them stared at her with sad eyes)
(Clank and Bobble silently returned to their work)
Tinker Bell: I have to go.
(Tinker Bell bolted out the windows. She would make it up to them later, she told herself. She didn't know how exactly, but she would figure it out)
(Right now she had more important things to do)
(And Fawn was waiting)
(EXT. PINE TREE GROVE — DAY)
Fawn: Now, flap them. Flap them. That's it! Have fun!
(Tink flew over to join Fawn, who gave her a smile)
Fawn: Hey, Tink! You ready?
Tinker Bell: A little nervous, actually.
(Fawn laughed)
Fawn: Oh, don't be silly. Come on, you'll be fine.
Bird: (chirp)
FAWN: We're teaching baby birds how to fly.
(Fawn led Tink back to the nest. Another hatchling watched them with big eyes)
Fawn: First, you have to get their attention. Smile and establish trust.
(Fawn gave the bird a sweet grin and a pat on the head)
Fawn: See?
(The tiny chick twittered bashfully and hopped up to get a better look at Fawn)
Fawn: Okay, open your wings, honey, and flap them up and down. Up and down.
(Fawn flapped her wings, and the baby bird flapped his, mimicking her)
(Fawn applauded)
Fawn: That's the way. Faster, faster. That's right.
(The little bird began to rise into the air)
Fawn: Yes! You're doing it! Okay. Come out this way a little bit.
(Fawn coaxed the bird forward. When he looked down and realized he was in the air, he began to drop, but Fawn skillfully boosted him back up)
Fawn: You're okay. You're okay. You got it. Keep flapping, keep flapping! (to Tink) Hey, why don't you help that last little guy?
(Tink looked into the nest and spotted a tiny chick hunkered down low. He was clearly hoping not to be seen)
Tinker Bell: Okay, okay. Just smile and establish trust.
(She gave him a big grin. Too big, maybe. Instead of a friendly cheep, the baby bird greeted her with a terrified squawk)
Tinker Bell: Hi, there!
(Tinker Bell tried not to take it personality)
Tinker Bell: Hey, little fella, you wanna do some flap-flap today?
(The bird shook his head)
Tinker Bell: Oh, sure you do! All you do is, you just flap your wings, like this.
(Tinker Bell began to rise, hoping the little bird would follow along. But when she looked down to check his progress, he was hiding behind the shards of his eggshell)
Tinker Bell: No, no, no. None of that.
(Tink tried to pull him out from behind the eggshell)
Tinker Bell: Come on. All we got to do is… Ouch!
(The hatchling had given her hand a peck)
(Tink narrowed her eyes. She was going to have to get tough)
Tinker Bell: Look. I'm going to level with you, okay? I kind of bombed out on the whole water and light fairy things, and I'm starting to run out of options here. If you could see fit to flap your little wings and take flight for a few measly seconds, I might be able to go to the mainland and bring happiness to the world! What do you say?
(The bird reached for a piece of eggshell and slowly began to reassemble his shell–around himself)
Tinker Bell: Wrong answer.
(She grabbed the chick's wings and pulled. One way or another, this cute little birdie was going to leave the nest)
Tinker Bell: If I end up making acorn kettles for the rest of my life, I am holding you personally responsible.
(The bird pecked frantically at Tink's hand and face)
Sparrowman: (LAUGHING) Hey, hey. Look at this!
Tinker Bell: Okay, just stop squirming. Would you just… Hey! Okay, okay, okay. I'm letting go. I am letting go.
(Tink released him and looked around for Fawn)
Tinker Bell: This is not working.
(This was not working. She was going to need some help)
(All the animal fairies seemed to be busy. But up in the sky, silhouetted against the sun, she saw a huge bird soaring majestically)
(Tink perked up)
Tinker Bell: Hey, maybe that guy can help. He's a really good flyer.
(Tink shot up into the air, streaking toward the bird)
Tinker Bell: Hey, up there!
(Higher and higher she flew. So high that she didn't hear the voices of the scout fairies. She looked down. They all seemed to be watching her. Waving their arms. Shaking their heads. Trying desperately to tell her something)
(Whatever it was, it would have to wait. This bird was traveling fast. If Tink didn't get his attention, he'd be gone)
(Tinker Bell put her hands around her mouth and yelled as loudly as she could at the bird)
(The big bird turned and began flying back toward Tink. All right! It had worked)
(But then Tink got a good look at the bird, now diving directly at her, and her heart came to an awful, sickening stop)
(It was a hawk!)
Sparrowman: (GASPS) Hawk!
(Thinking fast, Tink dove straight down. She aimed for the dense branches. Maybe if she disappeared into the foliage she could lose the hawk)
FAIRY 1: What's happening?
Flower Fairy: Quick, hide!
FAIRY 2: Look out!
(She flew into the canopy of the woods. The leaves slapped briskly at her arms and legs as they closed behind her)
(CRRAACK!)
(She could hear the hawk swooping through the branches behind her)
Mushroom Fairy: A hawk! Tinker Bell's in trouble!
(Tink spied a knothole in a tree trunk. She headed for it, zigging and zagging. She dove inside and cowered against the inner wall of the hollow trunk just in time. Outside, the hawk screamed and clawed at the bark)
(Suddenly, someone pulled her wings down and spun her around)
Vidia: Hey!
Tinker Bell: Vidia?
Vidia: This is my hiding spot!
(There was a hideous cracking sound and they both screamed. The hawk had torn a big chunk of bark away from the knothole. It wouldn't be long before he was able to reach in with his talons)
(Vidia ran toward a hole in the floor of the trunk)
Vidia: But it's all yours, now.
(And with that, she jumped into the opening and disappeared)
(Tink followed her)
(The two fairies slid through the chute in the trunk of the tree. Tink could see the light at the end of the hole)
(Just ahead of Tink, Vidia came to a screeching stop, grabbing the edges of the knothole to keep from sliding out)
(Tink tried to grab hold of something herself, but she wasn't quick enough. She skidded right into Vidia, sending the raven-haired fairy sprawling out onto a branch—right between the taloned feet of the hawk!)
(Vidia looked up, her eyes widening with horror. The hawk looked down and opened his beak to strike)
(At that moment, a hail of rocks, twigs, berries, and seeds showered over the hawk. The bird reared back)
(A second volley of rocks and sticks rained down and over his head. He veered from side to side, disoriented)
Sparrowman: Get him!
ALL: Get him!
(Tink could hear the fairies shouting at the hawk as they pelted him with anything and everything they could get their hands on)
(Finally, the hawk wheeled upward and flew away. His angry screech echoed through the forest, raising the hair on the back of every fairy neck in Anaheim)
FAIRY 1: What?
FAIRY 2: You all right?
FAIRY 1: So scary.
(The fairies gathered around Vidia. She was a mess. She had gotten hit with a few berries herself and was covered with bits of pulp and purple juice)
Light Fairy: Are you okay, Vidia?
(Some giggled, but Tink actually felt sorry for her. Haughty Vidia, the fastest fairy in Pixie Hollow, looked bedraggled, defeated, rattled, and humiliated)
Tinker Bell: Let me help you.
(She reached out to try to wipe the berry juice from Vidia's cheek)
Vidia: Don't touch me! I'm fine!
Tinker Bell: But I was only trying to help.
Vidia: Well, stop trying.
(Vidia scrambled to her feet and flew away, looking even more fierce than the hawk, and a lot more purple)
(Silvermist, Rosetta, Iridessa, and Fawn gathered around Tink)
Silvermist: Tinker Bell…
(Tink cut her off. There was nothing anybody could say now that would make her feel better)
(Everything she did was a disaster)
Tinker Bell: I can't hold water. I can't hold light. Birds hate me. I'm just so useless!
Fawn: Tink.
(Tink spread her wings and flew away. She knew that nobody could help her)
(EXT. GOLF COURSE, GOLF HILLS — DAY. Walter, ORCHID, DAISY, and Tulip were all at Golf Hills, playing a game of golf. Orchid was up to hit the golf ball, and was talking to herself. He was performing some type of ritual to give her some luck on the golf shot)
ORCHID: (SIGHS) A hundred and seventy-five yards. Okay, little fella. You my friend or are you my enemy? You are my friend, right? You are my ally. You are my associate, my personal assistant. You are my weapon. You are leaving.
(Orchid hit the golf ball, and the ball went near the hole)
Walter: Great shot.
Tulip: Nice shot, Mrs. Orchid.
(Orchid poses, frozen)
WALTER: You can stop posing now. Good try.
Daisy: Not bad, not bad.
ORCHID: Something for you to shoot at.
Walter: Hit it good.
Daisy: Do my best.
Walter: It was a good shot.
Orchid: Yeah, I know. Walt, I gotta ask you something. The NBA has to face reality. What's happening to these players is serious. They're gonna need new players with talent. Guys who are skilled, but never really thought about a professional career before. You think I got a shot? Come on, really?
Walter: No.
Orchid: Don't kid me.
Walter: Listen. It's a man's game. You can't play.
Orchid: What if I tried really hard?
Daisy: Keep it down. I'm trying to hit this ball.
Orchid: It's because I'm white, isn't it?
Walter: No. Daisy's white. So what?
Daisy: Daisy's not white. Daisy's clear.
(Daisy hit the golf ball)
Walter & Daisy (Both): Good shot, Daisy.
TULIP: That's nice.
Walter: Get inside her ball.
(The ball went near the hole)
TULIP: Whoa.
DAISY: You clowns can't beat that. My best shot ever.
Walter: You haven't played long.
Daisy: A Hall-of-Fame shot.
Tulip: Really nice shot, Mrs. Daisy.
DAISY: Daisy, please.
Tulip: Nice shot, Mrs. Daisy.
Orchid: Nice shot, Daisy.
Tulip: You can do this. Don't be nervous. You can do this.
Orchid: Daisy, you feel that the NBA has to face reality, don't you? Gotta look for more dominant players in places they never looked before.
Tulip: Just look at the ball. Visualize where you want it to go.
Walter: Right, right, right.
Tulip: Be the ball. Be the ball.
Walter: Get off the tee.
Orchid: You can't jump. I... Yeah, go on.
Walter: Close to the pin?
ORCHID: Close to the pin? For dinner?
DAISY: Sounds good.
ORCHID: I'll go close to the pin.
Walter: Okay, cool.
Daisy: I'll take some of that.
(After he said that, Walter went up to hit the ball. He then hit the golf ball, and it went up into the air, impressing everyone that was around him)
ORCHID: That's not bad.
DAISY: Good shot.
Walter: Get down.
(The golf ball went down, and landed on the grass)
WALTER: Look at that. Look at that spin.
(Underground, Kermit used a magnet to attract the golf ball down into the hole, so they could get Walter to help them. However, they thought that the ball was moving itself)
Walter: Come on.
Orchid: It is alive.
(After a few minutes of tension and excitement rising, the ball finally went down the hole, giving Walter a hole-in-one, and everyone cheered for the young teenager)
Walter: Yes! Yes! My first hole in one. Yes!
(CUT TO: GOLF HOLE)
ORCHID: Oh.
DAISY: Don't say it.
TULIP: Never seen one of these before.
Walter: Daisy, nothing but the bottom of the cup.
ORCHID: That's his ball too.
Walter: Yeah, yeah, it's my ball. Sorry.
Tulip: Let me get a picture.
(As Walter began to get his golf ball, Tulip got a camera out to take a picture of her friend)
Walter: You girls are jealous.
Tulip: All right, here we go. Now, you gotta smile. Reach in for the ball and then smile, okay?
Walter: Yes.
Tulip: And you think, "This is good."
WALTER: Just take the picture.
Tulip: Okay.
(Before Tulip took the picture, however, a rope grabbed Walter through the golf hole, and began to take him to Muppet Land. Everyone did not know where Walter went)
Orchid: What kind of camera is that?
Tulip: Just...
(Orchid grabbed the camera from her)
Orchid: Don't point it at me. Close the lens cap.
Tulip: I didn't do anything.
Daisy: Where did he go?
(INT. UNDERGROUND — DAY. As Orchid put the camera away, Walter were still being pulled through the golf hole to get into Muppet Land. When he saw the portal, he was pulled right through the magic rings...)
(EXT. MUPPET LAND — DAY. ...and landed into the ground)
(When they did, Walter was in a daze, and saw small pixie dust circling through his head. As his vision began to get clear, he saw Kermit the Frog standing here)
Kermit: Oh, uh, look out for that first step, darling, it's a real lulu.
Walter: Kermit the Frog?
Kermit: Uh, you expected maybe the frog prince?
Walter: You're a TV star. You're not real.
Kermit: Not real, uh? If I weren't real, could I do this?
(Kermit pulled Walter up to him and gave him a big kiss. When he pulled him back, Walter just wiped the kiss right off of him. Suddenly, Dr. Teeth looked out with Lew Zealand)
Dr. Teeth: Oh, look. Is that Walter?
(Rowlf pops out from the sewer)
Rowlf: It's Walter.
SAM EAGLE: It's Air Jordan.
(Animal pops out of a mailbox)
Animal: Basketball.
(Pepé saw Walter staring at him)
Pepé: Ooh. I thought I saw... I did. I did see Walter Jordan, okay.
(Scooter went up to Walter with an autograph book)
Scooter: Pardon me, Mr. Jordan. Uh, can I have your auto... Your John Hancock, please?
(Suddenly, Fozzie appeared in a doctor's outfit, as a reference to "The Veterinarian's Hospital", so he could take a look at Walter)
Fozzie: Back off. Let the doctor take a look.
(Fozzie pulled a lever that sent Walter way up. Fozzie noticed this, and thought it was a little too high)
Fozzie: A little high.
Walter: No.
Fozzie: Going down.
(He pulls the lever and the chair sent Walter down real quickly and went down with ease. Lew Zealand, Scooter, Janice, Beaker, and Link all gave Walter varying scores of 9.5 to 11)
Gonzo: So, what do you say we go for a little spin?
(He spun Walter around, stopping her so he could look in her ears)
Gonzo: Hmm. Now, let's see what we got inside here.
(Gonzo was looking in Walter's ears while Kermit was on the other side of Walter)
Kermit: Yodel-lay-hee-ho!
FOZZIE: Say "ah."
(He gave Walter a thermometer, which exploded, then stamped an "OK" on his forehead)
Gonzo: All right. She's okay.
Walter: What's going on here?
(Kermit sat on Walter's lap)
Kermit: Why, Walt, I thought you'd never ask. These aliens from outer space want to make us slaves for their theme park. What do you care? They're little. So we challenge them a basketball game. But then they show up and they ain't so little. They're huge. We need to beat these guys, because they're talking about slavery. They'll make us do stand-up comedy, the same jokes every night for all eternity. We'll be locked up like a bunch of wild animals, trotted out to perform for a bunch of low-brow, bug-eyed, fat-headed, humor-challenged aliens. Uh, what I'm trying to say is, we need your help!
Walter: Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now.
Kermit: Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor.
(He pulled up a frog's skull and threw it over his head, while Walter looked at the audience, raising an eyebrow)
(EXT. GOLF HOLE, GOLF HILLS — DAY. Tulip was looking down into the golf hole with the hope that her friend would come out before Walter's baseball game tomorrow night)
Tulip: Walt? Walter? It's Tulip. Tulip Podolak. Uh, look, I need you to come out now, okay? Because you got a baseball game tomorrow. And I'd look pretty stupid if you don't show up.
(Meanwhile, Orchid and Daisy were all walking to one of the golf carts as they were also wondering where Walter went)
Daisy: Think Walter's all right? I hate to leave her like this.
Orchid: I'm sure she's fine. I think she just had to get away from that Tulip character.
Daisy: God, she's pathetic, isn't she?
Orchid: I'm gonna give us both twos back there. We weren't in any kind of emotional state to putt.
Daisy: I think that's fair.
(When Orchid and Daisy got into one of the golf carts, Orchid began to explain who would replace Walter)
Orchid: Now, if Walter is gone, the NBA is gonna need some new people. There's room at the top. An exciting guy who could maybe even perform at half-time. You still tight with David Stern? A phone call from you...
(INT. STORYTELLER GYMNASIUM, MUPPET LAND — DAY. The Muppets (Scooter, Bunsen, Floyd, Kermit, Pepé, Gonzo, Fozzie, Rowlf, Janice, Lew Zealand) led Walter into their local gym, and, to her surprise, it looked like a complete mess)
Walter: Look, I want to help, but I haven't played basketball in the long time. My timing's all off.
Kermit: Eh, we'll fix your timing. Look at our facilities.
Fozzie: We've got hoops.
(He hung onto a basketball hoop, breaking as he fell right off)
(Animal lifted up some weights to show Walter that he had some pretty good exercise equipment to practice for the upcoming basketball challenge against the MonStars)
DR. TEETH: We got weights.
(The weights landed on the penguins, carrying Animal away)
(Rowlf then appeared right next to a locker)
Rowlf: We've got balls.
(He opened the locker, and a variety of balls buried him underneath)
Rowlf: Whoa!
Walter: You sure do. This place is a mess.
Gonzo: Mess? You're only worried about a little mess? There's nothing here a little spit shine wouldn't fix.
(He then shouted to all of the Muppets)
Gonzo: Spit shine!
Rowlf: Spit shine!
(Everyone (Fozzie, Gonzo, Scooter, Kermit, Dr. Teeth, Janice, Rowlf, Pepé, Bunsen, Lew Zealand, Floyd, Sam Eagle) else began to spit on the gym floor, making Walter a little uncomfortable. How was this going to get the gym floor clean?)
(However, Animal began to grab some mops, and spun around the entire gym. He cleaned every corner, edge, and equipment clean. He even made the ceiling and the entire gym "so fresh, so clean". It looked as good as new, and he finished with a smile)
Animal: Lemony-fresh.
Walter: You guys are nuts.
Scooter: Correction: We're The Muppets.
Fozzie: And as such are the exclusive property and trademark of the Jim Henson Company.
(Fozzie lifted up his hand, which had the Jim Henson Company logo stamped on it, and he kissed it literally)
(As the entire gym became silent, some loud, rumbling noises came. Everyone (Floyd, Kermit, Walter, Pepé, Janice, Rowlf, Beaker, Scooter, Lew Zealand) turned their heads towards the doors, and saw Nawt barge in with a snarl, then Pound broke in with a roar, and Bupkus and Bang broke through the double doors)
Bupkus: I'm here.
(Finally, Blanko came in)
Blanko: Me too.
(However, he was not looking where he was going, smacked his face into a basketball hoop, and reared back, covering his face)
Blanko: That hurt.
(The MonStars approached the Muppets (Lew Zealand, Penguin, Floyd), giving Walter looks of interest, and "mightier than you" grins)
Walter: Who are these guys?
Kermit: Well, uh, remember the tiny aliens I've told you about?
(Then he pointed at the MonStars)
Walter: Oh.
Pound: You heard of the Dream Team? Well, we're the Mean Team, wussy-woman
Bupkus: Wussy-man.
Walter: Wussy-man?
Nawt: We're the MonStars. M-O-N... Um...
Pound: Let's see what you got, chump.
(He threw the basketball to Walter)
Walter: I don't play basketball anymore.
(He threw the basketball back to Pound)
Bupkus: "I don't play basketball anymore."
(He makes himself and the MonStars laugh)
Bang: Maybe you're fish. (MIMICS FISH)
(He flapped his arms and bubbled like a fish, annoying Walter. Lew Zealand came to his defense)
Lew Zealand: I say, I resemble that remark.
Walter: You calling us fish?
Pound: Hey. Come here.
(Out of nowhere, Pound grabbed Walter and molded him into the shape of a ball, literally)
Pound: Here you go. Take him.
(He passed her to Nawt. Nawt caught him, and began to show off his handles)
Nawt: Watch the footwork. Can you believe it?
(Nawt then threw Walter over Floyd, Gonzo, Fozzie, Rowlf, and Kermit's heads, leaving a trail of fire over their heads, and Bang caught him)
Bang: Get out of the way.
(He slammed Walter down the hoop so hard that it shattered all over the place. Walter bounced along the floor as Scooter, Animal, Rizzo, Rowlf, Floyd, Fozzie, and Gonzo looked with pity)
POUND: Hey, everybody. Look at your hero now.
(Walter went back to his normal shape. He brushed himself off, then looked at the MonStars)
Walter: You guys are making a big mistake.
Bang: You're all washed up, girly!
Walter: Girly?
(Pepé steps forward to Bang and defended Walter)
Pepé: He is not washed up. Walter's the greatest ever, okay.
(Bang gave them a glare and flicked Pepé like a bug)
Bang: Shut up.
(Pepé were smacked to the wall and slid to the ground. Walter ran over to him and picked him up)
PEPE: My poor little cranium.
Walter: You okay?
Blanko: Yeah, are you okay?
(Blanko look over both Bang and Bupkus's shoulders, to which both of them growled at him)
Blanko: Whoops.
(Pepé looked at Walter, teary-eyed)
Pepé: You're not scared of them, are you, Walter?
(Walter took a look at the MonStars, who were giving him evil grins, while the Muppets (Floyd, Kermit, Scooter, Fozzie, Gonzo, Rowlf) looked at her for help. He stood up and saw Pepé standing by his side)
Walter: Let's play some basketball.
MUPPETS: Yeah.
(EXT. LOCAL BASKETBALL COURT — DAY. A group of girls were playing a pick-up game of basketball)
PLAYER: Yeah, serve her! Come on! Rebound!
(Charles Barkley was walking along the fence, watching the girls play the game)
Basketball Girl: You're... You're Charles Barkley. Girls. Come on over. Hurry up. Hurry. Look. It's Charles Barkley.
Charles: Hey, can I play?
(Charles was invited to play with them, they thought that he was actually a Charles Barkley wannabe)
Basketball Girl: You're not Charles Barkley. Just a wannabe who looks like him. Sorry. Break out. You shouldn't even be here. Be gone. Wannabe. Be gone.
(Afterwards, he was shooed out of the game)
(INT. HOSPITAL — DAY. Muggsy Bogues, Patrick Ewing, Shawn Bradley, and Larry Johnson were at a doctor's office, checking up about what has been going on with their game recently)
DOCTOR: Just a few more tests, gentlemen. Electrolyte levels, glucose, CBCs, RBCs, etcetera. And we've scheduled a 12-lead stress test...
(Patrick, Shawn, and Larry accidentally hit their heads on one of the top parts)
Doctor: And neurological battery to include EEG, reflex tests...
(INT. PSYCHOLOGISTS' OFFICE — DAY.)
Charles: And this girl, 5-feet-nothing, blocked my shot.
Psychologist: When did you first start having this dream?
Charles: It wasn't a dream. It really happened.
(Later on, after their checkups, Patrick appeared at the psychologist to talk about their performance in recent NBA games)
Psychologist: Are there any other areas besides basketball where you find yourself unable to perform?
Patrick: No.
Psychologist: Just asking.
(INT. CHURCH — DAY. After Shawn and Larry spoke to the doctor, Charles Barkley was seen praying at a church, asking God to forgive him for all of the things that he did)
Charles: I promise I'll never swear again. I'll never get another technical. I'll never trash-talk.
(INT. PSYCHOLOGISTS' OFFICE — DAY. WITH SHAWN BRADLEY)
Psychologist: I've got other skills. I could go back and work on the farm.
Shawn: Really?
Psychologist: Or maybe I could go back to the jungle and be a missionary again.
(WITH MUGGSY BOGUES)
Muggsy: What are you saying? That I'm trying to disobey my mama?
Psychologist: I didn't say that. You did, Muggsy.
Muggsy: But I love my mama.
(INT. HOSPITAL — DAY.)
Patrick: Still can't find anything wrong with us.
Muggsy: Hey, maybe nothing's wrong with us.
Larry: That's right, Muggs. Maybe it's just in our head.
Muggsy: We're fine. It's just some psychosomatic deal. Or something to do with the moon, or the alignment of the planet.
(INT. CHURCH — DAY.)
Charles: I'll never go out with Madonna again.
(EXT. GOLF HOLE, GOLF HILLS — DAY. Tulip was digging a hole at one of the golf holes, still trying to figure out what happened to Walter. The golfer. was wondering what she were doing, so he walked up to her to figure out what was going on)
Golfer: What are you doing?
Tulip: I'm, uh... I'm fixing a divot.
Golfer: Oh.
(He spoke to one of his friends)
Golfer: She's fixing a divot!
(INT. STORYTELLER GYMNASIUM — DAY. It looked like the Muppets were practicing for the Ultimate Game against the MonStars. However, only Kermit was actually practicing their skills for the game, while the others all did their Muppet things. Janice was prancing after Dr. Teeth, Floyd was playing with his basketball, and Animal was going crazy)
(Gonzo fell down and a basketball fell on his head, and went to Beaker)
Bunsen: Nice caught, Beakie!
Beaker: Mee.
Bunsen: But here's something we could help. This is the rocket so we can shoot people into the air. All you got to do is lit up the fuse and the rocket will blast off!
(He lit the fuse and the rocket launches, pulling Beaker and it flies around the gym and crashes into the wall. He is all battered up by the rocket)
Bunsen: Beaker, are you all right?
(Walter shook his head)
Walter: Has anyone here ever played basketball?
Piggy: Um, I have.
(The Muppets (Rowlf, Pepé, Lew Zealand, Animal, Zoot, Scooter) turned to see MISS PIGGY, one of the main Muppet stars, walk into the gym)
Piggy: Hi. I'd like to try out for the team.
(The Muppets (Behemoth, Rowlf, Lew Zealand, Marvin Suggs, Zoot, Animal, Pepé, Scooter) were all looking impressed with Piggy, and Kermit seemed to have taken an interest into Piggy)
Kermit: Hey.
Piggy: Hi. Moi name is Miss Piggy.
Kermit: Piggy?
Piggy: Ha, ha. Yes.
Kermit: Hi-ho. Uh, my name is Kermit. Ahem. You want to play a little one-on-one, doll?
Piggy: "Doll"?
Kermit: Uh-huh.
Piggy: On the court, Kermit.
Kermit: Sure.
(He zoomed out onto the court)
Pepé: Ooh. She's hot.
(Everyone (Zoot, Animal, Dr. Teeth, Scooter, Floyd, Lew Zealand, Gonzo, Fozzie, Pepé, Walter) went to the side to watch Kermit and Piggy play a game of one-on-one, and it was about to look real awesome)
FLOYD: There she goes.
Piggy: Ready?
Kermit: Yes. I got it. I got it.
(Piggy zoomed past Kermit real quickly, leaving him tied up. Piggy then went up to the hoop, and dunked the ball, impressing everyone in the gym)
Walter: That girl's got some skills.
(Piggy walked over to Kermit)
Kermit: Yes?
(Piggy then pulled up Kermit's face up to hers)
Piggy: Don't ever call me "doll."
(She blew the hair away from her face)
Kermit: Check.
(His body stiffened and fell to the ground)
Piggy: Hey, nice playing with you.
(She left the gym)
Walter: Very smooth.
Kermit: Ah, she's obviously nuts about me.
Walter: Obviously.
Janice: Oh, wow.
WALTER: Okay. Where's the ball?
Janice: For sure.
(Janice passed him the ball)
Walter: Let's do some drills.
(Before all of the Muppets could do so, Walter's golf shoes were stuck in the floor, and it caused him to fall and let go of the basketball as it dribbled away)
Walter: Can anyone lend me a pair of sneakers?
Kermit: Uh, sneakers?
(All of the Muppets (Kermit, Janice, Beaker, Floyd, Lew Zealand, Rowlf, Pepé, Fozzie, Gonzo) saw that they did not really have an extra pair of sneakers)
Pepé: Sorry.
Walter: Someone has to go to my house and pick up my basketball gear.
Fozzie: To your house ... in 3D land?
WALTER: Yeah. Whatever you do, don't forget my Los Angeles shorts.
Fozzie: Your shorts? From college?
Walter: I wore them under my uniform every game.
(The Muppets (Rowlf, Beaker, Gonzo, Fozzie, Kermit) all gave disgusted looks)
Walter: Hey. I washed them after every game.
Rowlf: Yeah.
Scooter: Sure.
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DAY. Tiana and Naveen played some music. But before they could get to stop strumming and start working, Tiana spotted an enormous alligator emerging from beneath the surface)
(Both frogs froze in terror. But to their surprise, this alligator was not interested in eating them. He was interested in Naveen's music)
Louis: I know that tune! Dippermouth Blues!
(The alligator, LOUIS, found his trumpet, which he called Giselle. Closing his tooth-filled mouth, he put the instrument to his lips and began to blow, making sweet and lively music)
Naveen: Play it, brother!
(He joined in on his ukulele)
Naveen: Oh, yeah!
(Out of sheer joy, Louis screamed and grabbed Naveen, accidentally knocking Tiana)
Louis: Where you been all my life?
Naveen: Where did you learn to play like that?
(Tiana looked at them both)
Louis: Why, the park's the best jazz school in the world. All the greats play the riverboats. Old Louis would give anything to be up there jamming with the big boys.
Naveen: Why don't you?
Louis: Oh, I tried once.
(EXT. MARK TWAIN RIVERBOAT — NIGHT – BACKSTORY. Louis told the story of how he had once climbed aboard a riverboat to join a band. But as soon as the people saw that he was a real alligator–not a person dressed in an alligator suit–they chased him off the boat. Louis had never tried to play with humans again...)
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DAY. ...but he continued to play out on the bayou, alone)
Louis: It didn't end well.
(Tink stepped up and dragged Naveen away)
Tiana: Uh-huh. It has been a real pleasure meeting you, Louis. And thank you kindly for not eating us, but we best be on our way.
(She led Naveen back to the raft)
Louis: Where... Where y'all going?
Tiana: To find somebody to break this spell.
(Louis looked around, confused)
Louis: What spell?
Naveen: Brace yourself, my scaly friend. We are not frogs. We are humans.
Louis: (LAUGHING) Y'all serious?
Naveen: I am Naveen, Prince of Maldonia. And she is Tiana, the waitress. (SOFTLY) Do not kiss her.
Tiana: (GASPS) Now, just a second. This goon here got himself turned into a frog by a voodoo man, and now...
Louis: Voodoo? Like the kind Mama Odie do?
Naveen: Mama Odie?
Louis: Mama Odie. She the queen of the town. She got magic and spells, all kind of hoodoo.
Naveen & Tiana (Both): Could you take us to her?
Louis: (GASPS) Through the deepest, darkest part around the bayou? Facing razor-sharp pricker bushes and trappers and hunters with guns? No.
(Tiana signed, disappointed. But Naveen had an idea. He learned over to her and the Muppets and whispered)
Naveen: Watch and learn.
(He turned to the big alligator)
Naveen: Louis, it is too bad we cannot help you with your dream. If only you were smaller, less toothy, you could play jazz to adoring crowds without scaring them. Anyway, enjoy your loneliness, my friend. (BIDS GOODBYE IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE)
Tiana: Cute, but it's not going to...
(But as Louis looked around, he suddenly saw himself sitting alone on the bench)
Louis: Hey, guys, I just had me a crazy idea! What if I ask Mama Odie to turn me human?
Naveen: Louis! You are a genius!
Louis: Hallelujah!
(EXT. DISNEYLAND PARK/BAYOU, CALIFORNIA – MONTAGE. Kermit, Gonzo, Fozzie, and Link rides Space Mountain. Bunsen and Beaker rides Autopia. Kermit, Gonzo, and Fozzie rides Big Thunder Mountain Railroad)
Louis: (SINGING) If I were a human being
I'd head straight for Anaheim
And I'd blow this horn so hard and strong
Like no one they've ever seen
You've heard of Louis Armstrong,
Mr. Sidney Bechet?
All those guys gonna step aside
When they hear this old weirdo play, Listen...
When I'm human
As all I hope to be
I'm gonna blow this horn
'Til the cows come home
And everyone's gonna bow down for you
(Kermit, Scooter, and Rowlf cruises on Splash Mountain)
(Lew Zealand and Scooter love Enchanted Tiki Room)
(Beauregard, Scooter, and Crazy Harry rides the Matterhorn Bobsleds, Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem cruises on the Mark Twain Riverboat)
Naveen: When I'm myself again
I want just the life I had
A great big party every night
That doesn't sound too bad
A redhead on my left arm
A brunette on my right
A blonde or two to hold the candles
Now that seems just about right
Eh, Louis?
Life is short
When you're done, you're done
We're on this Earth
To have some fun
And that's the way things are
Louis: Tell it, brother!
Naveen: When I'm human
And I'm gonna be
I'm gonna tear it up like I did before
And that's a royal guarantee
Tiana: You are getting married!
Naveen: Oh, right.
Tiana: I'll just have to leave a string of broken hearts behind me!
(Gonzo and Camilla are around Dumbo the Flying Elephant, Kermit, Robin, and other frogs love Mr. Toad's Wild Ride, Kermit, Fozzie, Gonzo, Camilla, and Animal spins around at Mad Tea Party)
(Fozzie and Gonzo plays games in Toy Story Mania and Sweetums went on Monsters, Inc. Mike & Sulley to the Rescue!)
Tiana: (SINGING) Your modesty becomes you
And your sense of responsibility
I've worked hard for everything I've got
And that's the way it's supposed to be
When I'm a human being
At least I'll act like one
If you do your best each and every day
Good things are sure to come your way
What you give is what you get
My daddy said that
And I'll never forget
And I recommend it to you
Louis, Naveen, and Tiana: When we're human
And we're gonna be
Louis: I'm gonna blow my horn
Naveen: I'm gonna live the high life
Tiana: I'm gonna do my best
To take my place in the sun
Louis, Naveen, and Tiana: When we're human
(EXT. LABOUFF ESTATE — DAY. Charlotte enjoys a lovely afternoon with her handsome prince)
CHARLOTTE: Prince Naveen, dear. I am positively mortified you had to endure that frog fiasco last night.
(Lawrence was sitting across from her. He was wearing the talisman, and every inch of him looked exactly like Prince Naveen)
Lawrence: Well, when you're next in line for the throne, you're poised like a panther, ready to expect the unexpected.
(Charlotte suddenly looked horrified)
Charlotte: (EXCLAIMS) Your ear?
Lawrence: What? Oh!
(He immediately reached up and touched it. It was as big as a cabbage–and it was bright red!)
Lawrence: (LAUGHS) Those pesky mosquitoes. They're everywhere.
(Lawrence was terrified that the talisman was running out of magic. He kept his hand over his ear and began speaking quickly)
Lawrence: Please. Miss Charlotte, I can no longer ignore the throbbing of my heart.
(Lawrence's rear end suddenly expanded to twice its size! He was turning back into a fat little servant right before her very eyes)
Lawrence: Even though our time together has been brief, it's been heavenly!
(But Charlotte was too taken by the idea that a prince was proposing to her to notice)
Charlotte: Land sakes, Prince Naveen! You got me blushing like a...
(Lawrence dropped to one knee to try to hide his expanding body as his nose grew and his teeth went crooked. He ducked low)
Lawrence: Would you do me the honor of becoming Princess of Maldonia?
Charlotte: Are you serious?
Lawrence: As the plague.
(CHarlotte was thrilled)
Charlotte: Yes! I most definitely will marry you!
(She turned and giddily ran off)
Charlotte: There's so much to plan! I mean, the guest list, the dress, the music, the flowers, the shoes... (SQUEALS) We're going to have ourselves a Mardi Gras wedding!
(But just as Lawrence breathed a sigh of relief as Charlotte left, Dr. Facilier's sinister shadow slithered over to him. Then Dr. Facilier himself appeared and grabbed the talisman from Lawrence's neck, only to find that all its magic was gone)
Facilier: No!
(And with that, the last of the chubby valet's hair fell out)
Lawrence: What we do now?
Facilier: Because somebody let our froggy prince go, Larry.
(For the first time, Dr. Facilier seemed less than cadaverously cool)
Facilier: I'm reduced to ask for help from my friends on the other side.
(Lawrence gulped and glanced around nervously. He didn't know exactly who Dr. Facilier's friends were...and he hoped that he would have to find out!)
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DAY. Louis still daydreaming about the possibilities of a magical transformation)
Louis: Now, this restaurant of yours, is it going to have etouffee?
Tiana: Jambalaya, gumbo. It's going to have it all.
Louis: I've always wanted to try red beans and rice, muffulettas, po' boys.
Naveen: Stop, Louis. You two are making me so very hungry.
(A small swarm of mosquitoes buzzed by the frog's head. Automatically, Kermit's tongue snapped out, startling him)
Naveen: Interesting.
Tiana: What are you doing?
Naveen: (SOFTLY) Shh! You are frightening the food.
(He snapped at another mosquito and missed)
Naveen: This is harder than it looks.
(Naveen's tongue snapped out again and he accidentally wrapped it around the branch. Tiana laughed as the branch cracked and Naveen fell with it in his mouth)
(The firefly suddenly landed on a basket near Tiana. Her tongue instantly snapped at it. She put her hand over her mouth)
Tiana: What? Oh, no. No, no, no. This is no way I am kissing a frog and eating a bug on the same day.
(Her tongue darted out just as Naveen's went for the firefly, too. Their tongues snared each other instead of the firefly and–SMACK! They were suddenly nose to nose. Tiana shrieked. Their tongues were tangled together!)
Naveen: Hello.
(Tiana tried desperately to break loose)
Tiana: Hold still.
Naveen: Stop moving! You are making this very difficult!
(Louis suddenly saw the frogs)
Louis: Y'all find anything to eat yet? Oh, my. Hang on. Old Louis got it covered.
NAVEEN: No, no...
TIANA: Don't...
(Louis pulled and twist them until they were in a hopeless knot)
LOUIS: How's that?
Tiana: This could be a little better.
(Louis shook his head; then his big eyes brightened)
Louis: You know what this needs? A sharp stick! Be right back! (SCATTING)
Tiana: This is all your fault.
Naveen: My fault? My fault... Let me tell you something. I was having a wonderful time until...
(The fly they had been trying to catch hovered over them and began to chuckle. He had a missing tooth and a droopy antenna)
Ray: Coo! Well, looky here! Girl, I guess you and your boyfriend got a little carried away. Am I right?
Tiana: Oh, no, no! Do not be ridiculous! He's not my boyfriend!
Naveen: I am the Prince of Maldonia!
Ray: Let me shine a little light on the situation.
(A soft glow shone from his tail)
Ray: That's more better. Yeah.
(Tiana and Naveen were surprised)
(He looked at the tangled frog and princess)
Ray: It's okay. I don't explode me. I ain't no firecracker! I just got my big butt glowing! That's right! The women like a man with a big back porch! Lord, you done this up real good, for sure.
(He tapped on Naveen's foot and gave him a bemused look)
Ray: Now where this go to at?
(He flared his light and walked down between the two helpless frogs, trying to help them)
Ray: Hang on, Cap. I'm just going to give a little twist here. We're getting to know each other now! (SINGING) We're back in the jungle 'round fishin' time
(He held the end of Naveen's tongue and gave it a sharp yank. Tiana and Naveen unraveled and instantly sprang apart)
Ray: It's about time I introduce myself. My name Raymond, but everybody call me "Ray."
Naveen: Pardon me, but your accent, it's funny, no?
Ray: I'm a Cajun, brah. Born and bred in the bayou.
Naveen: Actually, we are from a place far, far away from this world.
Ray: Go to bed! Y'all from Shreveport?
Naveen: No. No, no, no. We are people.
Tiana: Prince Charming here got himself turned into a frog by a voodoo witch doctor.
Ray: Well, there you go.
Tiana: And we were on our way to Mama Odie's. We think maybe she.
Ray: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Mama Odie? Y'all headed the wrong directional, chere. Now what kind of chucklehead told y'all to go this way?
(Louis suddenly burst from the bushes)
Louis: I found a stick!
Tiana: Louis. Ray here says you've been taking us in the wrong direction.
(Louis shuffled his feet)
Louis: (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) I was... Well, listen. I was confused by the topography and the geography and the choreography and...
(Ray leaned over to Tiana)
Ray: First rule of the bayou, never take direction from a gator.
(Ray patted Tiana's arm as if to tell her there was no need to worry. The he whistled loudly. Suddenly, the troop of fireflies appeared)
Ray: Why, me and my relationals will help show you all the way.
Naveen: (EXCLAIMS)
Ray: Hey, Cousin Randy! You ready for a little bayou zydeco?
Cousin Randy: Ready when you are, Cousin Ray.
Ray: All right, Lulu. Let's get to it, darling. Come on, chere! Just follow the bouncing butt!
(SINGING) We're gonna take you there
We're gonna take you there
We're gonna take you all the way there
Gonna take you there
We're gonna take you there
We're gonna take you all the way
Going down the bayou
Going down the bayou
Going down the bayou
Taking you all the way
(SPOKEN) We got the whole family. There goes Mimi, Cousin Beaudreaux. Oh, Grandmama! Y'all light out!
We're all gonna pull together
Dow here that's how we do
Me for them and them for me
We all be there for you
We gonna take ya
We gonna take ya
We gonna take ya all the way there
We know where you're goin' and we're goin' with you
Takin' you all the way
Going down the bayou
Going down the bayou
Going down the bayou
Taking you all...
Yeah, you know!
(SPOKEN) Come on, y'all! Keep that line flowing and the lights a-glowing! Yeah, you're right!
(INT. VOODOO EMPORIUM — DAY. The voodoo man was busy. He turned and smiled wickedly at the masks covering his walls, calling a meeting of sorts. Dr. Facilier removed his hat respectfully)
Facilier: Friends, I know I'm in hock to y'all pretty deep already, but seems our little froggy prince lost his way and I need your generous assistance of getting him back.
(The masks stared at him with sinister looks)
Facilier: (LAUGHS) I hear you! Now, what's in it for y'all? Well, as soon as I dispose of Big Daddy LaBouff, and I'm running this resort. (LAUGHING MALICIOUSLY) I'll have the entire city of Anaheim in the palm of my hand. And you'll have all the wayward souls your dark little hearts desire.
(Dr. Facilier blows his hand and people turned into souls and flew away)
Facilier: (LAUGHING) Y'all love that, don't you? So, we got ourselves a deal?
(The masks silently conferred and an agreement was reached. Soon the room was alive with menacing shadows swarming out of the masks, ready to do Dr. Facilier's bidding)
Facilier: (LAUGHING) Now we're cooking! We're going to find ourselves a frog! Search everywhere! The quarter, the bayou. Bring him to me alive. I need his heart pumping for now. (SPEAKING FRENCH)
(Dr. Facilier struck his cane on the floor and the shadows slipped through the windows, doors, and vents of the lair. They fanned out across the streets of Anaheim, sliding along buildings. A few of them even made their way toward the bayou)
(INT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DAY. A heavy mist spread over Anaheim from the LaBouff estate to the Anaheim town, where Ray was waving goodbye to the firefly family. They had done their job, guiding Naveen, Tiana, and Louis closer to Mama Odie)
RAY: I'll take them the rest of the way.
Tiana: Nice meeting y'all!
Louis: Bye-bye, Pookie!
Ray: (SPEAKING FRENCH)
BEAUDREAUX: Will do, Cousin Ray!
Ray: And don't forget to tell Angela, Ray say, "Bonne chance!"
(The fireflies glittered off into the distance)
Tiana: That's your girl?
Ray: Oh, no, no. My girl? Ho, ho, ho. That's Evangeline.
Tiana: Evangeline?
Ray: She the most prettiest firefly ever did glow. (SQUEALS) You know, I talk to Evangeline most every night. She's kind of shy. Don't say much. And I know in my heart someday we are going to be together. Yeah.
(Tiana smiled, too)
Tiana: Aw! That's so sweet.
NAVEEN: Yeah, so sweet. Just do not settle down so quickly, my friend. There are plenty of fireflies in the swamp.
(Tiana was furious. Naveen was supposed to marry her friend Charlotte, but instead he was thinking about dating other ... girls or frogs or whatever he was thinking. Hopping onto land, Tiana took out some of her anger at the irritating prince by hacking a trail through some bayou briar bushes. But taking to land didn't turn out as well as the companions had hoped. The much-larger Louis found it impossible to avoid the briar thorn bushes)
Louis: (SHOUTS IN PAIN) Pricker bushes got me! Gator down! Gator down!
(Ray flew over to begin pulling the painful thorns out of Louis's skin)
Louis: The darkness is closing in! I'm so cold.
RAY: Will you hold still, you big baby?
(LOUIS SCREAMING)
RAY: I ain't touched it yet.
(The frog hunter named REGGIE and his two sons, DARNELL and his brother, TWO FINGERS appeared from the bushes and saw the two frogs)
Reggie: Oh! Take a look at them two jumpers. I can taste them frog legs already.
Darnell: Bet they taste real good with the sauce piquant, right, Pa?
Reggie: (SOFTLY) Will you keep quiet?
(He hits his son on the head with his club)
Darnell: (EXCLAIMS IN PAIN)
Two Fingers: (MUMBLING)
Reggie: Oh! My thoughts exactly, Two Fingers. It is time to catch us some frogs!
(EXT. POOL, BAYOU — DUSK. Meanwhile, Tiana and Naveen kept trying to move through the bushes)
Naveen: You know, waitress, I have finally figured out what is wrong with you.
Tiana: Have you now?
Naveen: You do not know how to have fun. There. Somebody had to say it.
Tiana: Thank you, because I figured out what your problem is, too.
Naveen: I'm too wonderful?
Tiana: No, you're a no-'count, philandering, lazy bump on a log.
Naveen: (CHUCKLES) (COUGHS) Killjoy.
Tiana: What did you say?
Naveen: Nothing. (COUGHS) Stick in the mud.
Tiana: Listen here, mister. This stick in the mud has had to work two jobs her whole life while you've been sucking on a silver spoon chasing chambermaids around your ivory tower!
Naveen: Actually, it's polished marble.
(WHOOSH! Naveen's expression turned to terror as he was suddenly snatched up in a net. Tiana gasped, horrified, as she saw Naveen being carried off by Reggie)
Reggie: I got me one, boys! Y'all get that little one over there!
(Just then, a big hand reached down for Tiana. She jumped over the gnarled hand, pulling one of Two Fingers' fingers back)
(The hunter let out a scream. He had lost almost all his fingers trapping wild critters, and he was sensitive about the only two he had left. He reached into his belt and pulled out his throwing knives. He hurled three of them at Tiana)
(Tiana felt them cut through the air and hit tree behind her with a whap, whap, whap! She stared at the huge knives for a second, then hopped away as fast as she could)
(Naveen was still struggling inside the net. Reggie was happy with his catch. He was thinking about a delicious meal of frog legs with a sauce picante as he climbed into his boat
(Behind the bushes, Ray pulled the thorn off Louis's finger. However, Louis took one look at the hunters)
REGGIE: That's good hunting today, yes, indeed!
(I was right! Louis thought)
Louis: Hunters with guns!
(He dove into a nearby bush to hide. Unfortunately, he'd landed in another pricker bush)
(LOUIS SCREAMING)
(Ray, on the other hand, realized that Naveen was in trouble!)
Reggie: Look at them big frog legs. I want me some corn bread with this dinner!
Ray: Oh, no!
(He took off)
Ray: A bug got to do what a bug got to do!
(He fly straight up Reggie's left nostril)
(Reggie yelped and let go of the net. Naveen took the opportunity to climb to the edge of the boat and dive into the water)
(The boat rocked wildly as Reggie stood and jammed his finger up his right nostril. Then he blew his nose hard. Ray came shooting out and smashed into a rock)
Ray: I think I done chipped my favorite tooth.
(On the bank, Tiana was trying to get away from Two Fingers. Suddenly, his brother, Darnell, came running through the bushes waving a club)
Darnell: Here I come, Two Fingers! I'll help...
(Darnell slipped and flipped onto the muddy bank, crashing into Two Fingers. Darnell's fall tipped the log under Tiana and launched her into the air. She landed right inside Darnell's frog trap)
Darnell: (EXCLAIMING) Pa! We got one!
(Darnell and Two Fingers climbed into the boat)
Two Fingers: Shush now! Get on quiet there!
Darnell: What happened to yours?
Reggie: Shut your trap, Darnell!
(Naveen burst up from the swamp water gasping. He could see Tiana. She was inside Darnell's cage. And the boat was pulling away! Without a moment's hesitation, Naveen set out to rescue her. He shot his sticky frog tongue out at the boat. As the boat poured on speed, it pulled the would-be rescuer along like a water-skier)
Darnell: Pa, did you hear that suspicious thud?
Reggie: Yeah. I sure did.
(He took off his hat)
(Tiana gasped. Naveen had pulled himself up to the boat and hopped onto Reggie's head)
(Darnell thought for a moment and picked up his club)
Reggie: What are you two gawking at?
(Darnell suddenly swung and hit him over the head with a BAM!)
Darnell: Just missed him!
(He raised the club again. He hit Reggie again but missed Naveen, who was quick on his feet)
Darnell: I will make him pay for his insolence!
Reggie: Two Fingers! I need some help over here!
Naveen: Now! Go!
(Two Fingers stood up, and the frog's trap's door sprang open. Tiana crawled out and joined Naveen. The two frogs jumped onto Two Fingers's foot)
Naveen: Watch this.
(Darnell stomped on his brother's foot with a crunch. Tiana and Naveen jumped into the air)
(The two frogs hopped back and forth among the hunters had knocked themselves silly)
(At last, Darnell collapsed into a pile with Reggie and Two Fingers at the bottom of the boat)
Reggie: These two ain't like no frogs I ever seen. They smart.
Tiana: And we talk, too.
(The three frog hunters, astounded by what they had heard, raced away as fast as they could. Laughing, Tiana and Naveen merrily went to find Ray and Louis)
(EXT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DUSK. On the riverbank, Louis emerged from the pricker bush, still sore and not completely aware of what was going on. Seeing Ray on the ground, he quickly ran to help the poor firefly, who had barely escaped death inside Hurley's nose)
Louis: You all right there, little bug?
(He used a tiny straw to fill Ray's chest with air)
Ray: I'm fine. But your breath done near kill me to death.
(Louis points to one of the prickly burrs in his chest)
Louis: Would you mind?
Ray: I got you covered.
(Ray yanked the thorn from the alligator's skin)
Louis: Much obliged, peewee. Now how about the other side?
(He turned around. Louis's entire backside was covered in prickers! This job was going to take a while)
(Naveen and Tiana came strolling out of the grass. They were laughing about their adventure)
Naveen: "And we talk, too." I like that. You are secretly funny.
Tiana: Not a stick in the mud? Say it. Say it.
Naveen: Well, I wouldn't go... All right. You're not exactly...
Tiana: I can't hear you. I'm sorry. What?
Naveen: ...a complete stick deep in the mud.
(Tiana giggled)
(Just then, they saw poor Louis covered in painful prickers, with Ray helping him by pulling them out one at a time)
Louis: (GROANING) Easy. Easy!
Ray: This one's in there, ain't it? Hold on.
Louis: Holy... (GRUNTING)
Ray: Chere, I know we got to get to Mama Odie lickety-split, but this particular extractification is going to take a while. Yeah.
Tiana: Poor Louis.
Louis: You know what would make me feel better? (SCREAMING) Crawfish smothered in remoulade sauce... Mercy!
RAY: Just a little more!
Louis: With some Bananas Foster sprinkled with pralines... Oh, Mama!
Tiana: How about some swamp gumbo?
Louis: That will do. (SHOUTING)
Naveen: Sounds delicious. I'll start with a pre-dinner cocktail and something to nibble on while I wait. Thanks.
(Naveen nodded and quickly settled in to wait as she cooked)
Tiana: No, no, no, your Royal Highness. You are going to mince these mushrooms.
(She handed Naveen a few wild mushrooms and a sharpened stone that he could use as a knife)
Naveen: (STUTTERS) Do what?
Tiana: Mince the mushrooms! Hop to it!
(As Tiana gathered up some ingredients from the cupboard, she saw Naveen struggling to cut into the first mushroom)
Naveen: Little ridiculous.
TIANA: Are you mincing?
Naveen: All right! Relax.
(He finally cut a slice)
Naveen: (EXHALES DEEPLY) One.
(Tiana paused for a moment and looked at Naveen. She almost felt sorry for the pampered frog)
Tiana: Step aside, mister. Watch and learn.
(Naveen was dazzled as Tiana quickly sliced and then minced a mushroom. She handed him the knife as they started making a pile of neatly sliced mushrooms)
Naveen: Oh! All right. (CHUCKLES)
(Naveen was impressed. He took the knife and started slicing by himself)
Tiana: There you go.
Naveen: You know, I've never done anything like this before.
Tiana: Really?
Naveen: All right. But when you live in a castle, everything is done for you. All the time. They dress you. They feed you. Drive you. Brush your teeth.
Tiana: Oh, poor baby.
Naveen: I admit it was a charmed life until the day my parents cut me off, and suddenly I realized I don't know how to do anything.
(Now Tiana began to feel genuinely sorry for him)
Tiana: Well, hey, you got the makings of a decent mushroom mincer.
Naveen: You think so?
Tiana: Keep practicing and I just might hire you.
Naveen: Really?
Tiana: No.
Naveen: (GROANS) Come on! What was that? That was below the frog belt.
(EXT. BEACH, LONG BEACH – DUSK. Tink flew to the beach cove to sulk. She settled down on the sand and began chucking pebbles into the foliage while she muttered to herself)
Tinker Bell: Great. I failed for the third time in a row. At this rate, I should get to the mainland right about… Oh… Never!
(She angrily heaved a pebble and heard an unexpected clink!)
(Curiously won out over self-pity. Tinker Bell flew over to see what was in the underbrush. She pulled aside the leaves and emerged into a little clearing)
(In the middle of the clearing stood a mysterious machine...or what was left of one)
(A round porcelain box encased the machine. Tink peered inside at an intricate arrangement of springs and levers–most of them out of place, bent, or broken)
(She couldn't help smiling. Rust and water had done a lot of damage. But it was still a lovely thing–and it would be a beautiful thing when she got through with it)
(Tink cracked her knuckles and got right to work. She enjoying putting the pieces together like a puzzle. Little by little, the apparatus began to take shape. Tinker Bell tweaked this and twisted that, using imagination and ingenuity to make it work. Flat-sided seashells made great screwdrivers. Seaweed made a terrific polishing cloth. And jellyfish jelly made excellent grease)
(Before long, she had repaired a strange metal comb, using twigs and pine-needle tips. She plucked the tines of the comb, listening to the different musical note each one made)
(Finally, all the parts were back inside the box and in their correct places. The gears were tight, and each screw was snug. The metal comb was fastened into its slot, with the tines lined up against a mysterious cylinder with little bumps all over it. Now, if only Tinker Bell knew what the box did!)
(Tink closed the lid. As she did, she noticed a hole in the lid that led directly into the gears of the box. There must be one more part, Tink realized. She looked around and noticed a brass post sticking out of a nearby bush. As she pulled the post out, she saw that it was attached to the feet of a porcelain ballerina. The figure was about Tink's size)
Using a sprinkle of pixie dust to make the ballerina light, Tink managed to carry her to the box and restore her to her rightful place on the very top. The post at her feet fit perfectly into the hole in the lid)
(Tinker Bell took the ballerina's outstretched hand and slowly spun her around. The most astonishing thing happened as the ballerina turned: the box began to play a melody! Oh, it was so beautiful! Tink's heart swelled. Now I need a name for it, she thought, and wracked her brain for a name. "Melody machine"? "Ditty player"? Oh, well, she thought, "music box" will have to do until I come up with something better)
(A sudden burst of applause startled her. She whirled around and saw Rosetta, Fawn, Iridessa, and Silvermist watching, beaming with pride)
FAWN: You fixed it!
SILVERMIST: Wow!
IRIDESSA: Beautiful!
ROSETTA: Amazing!
Tinker Bell: What are you guys doing here?
(But her friends were too busy admiring the music box to answer)
(Iridessa's eyes were opened wide)
IRIDESSA: It might be the sparkliest thing I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of sparkly things!
(Silvermist flew slowly around the box)
Silvermist: It's a really pretty thingy. What is it?
(Tinker Bell rubbed the end of her nose)
Tinker Bell: I don't know. I just found it.
(Rosetta smiled and glowed even pinker than usual)
Rosetta: Tinker Bell, don't you even realize what you're doing? You're tinkering!
(Tinker Bell shook her head forcefully. Fixing the music box hadn't felt at all like putting handles on acorn pails. It had been fun. Fun like inventing the nutcracker and the flower-sprayer)
Tinker Bell: What? No, no, this isn't… I was just…
(Rosetta stopped her)
Rosetta: Creating those gadgets, figuring things out, fixing stuff like this, that's what tinkering is, sweetie!
(Iridessa's glow flickered emphatically)
Iridessa: Don't you like doing this? Isn't it what you really love?
(Her friends had a point, Tink had to admit. If this was really what tinkering was about, then she certainly couldn't claim she didn't love it)
Silvermist: Yeah! Who cares about going to the mainland, anyway?
(That was when Tinker Bell recalled why she didn't want to be a tinker)
Tinker Bell: Well, I do, remember? I want to see where these things come from. Why are you saying this? Are you just giving up on me?
(She turned to look at Rosetta)
Tinker Bell: I mean, aren't you going to teach me to be a garden fairy anymore?
(Rosetta took a step forward)
Rosetta: Sweet pea, I think this is your talent.
(Silvermist shook her head, and droplets of water flew from the ends of her hair)
Silvermist: Tink, we just want you to be happy.
(Somehow, that just made Tink angrier)
Tinker Bell: If you really want me to be happy, you'll help me get to the mainland like you promised.
(Fawn reach out her hand)
Fawn: Please, Tinker Bell, just think about it.
(Tink backed away. What was there to think about? Sure, she liked to tinker. So what? What good was it if it didn't help her get what she wanted?)
(Her friends exchanged sad and helpless looks. Tink could see that they finally understood that nothing they could say or do was going to change her feelings. The four fairies rose into the air)
(Tink watched them fly away. High overhead, visible even in the day, was the Second Star–a signpost pointing to a destination she would never see. Why? Because she was a failure)
(If her friends wouldn't help her, then she was out of options)
(EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD — NIGHT. Kermit and Fozzie were digging to Walter's house to get her basketball gear)
FOZZIE: The view back here stinks.
(Suddenly, they finally stopped, and for good reason)
KERMIT: Whoa.
FOZZIE: What?
KERMIT: We're right in front of Walter's house.
FOZZIE: I knew that.
KERMIT: Shh. Okay, let's go in this way.
FOZZIE: I say, let's go in that way.
(By Fozzie's request, Kermit just went straight up into the house, and Fozzie went somewhere else, thinking that it was also going to get himself inside the house)
KERMIT: He just never learns.
(INT. CHARLES' DOGHOUSE — NIGHT. Meanwhile, Fozzie found himself at another area)
FOZZIE: Now, let me see. If my calculations are correct, I must be very, very close.
(Fozzie then flicked on a lighter, and saw that he wasn't in the house, but in the dog house, encountering Walter's pet bulldog, Charles. At this point in time, Fozzie could do what he did best)
Fozzie: Mother.
(With that, Charles began to beat up Fozzie as he tried to find various ways to get out of the dog house)
(INT. WALTER'S HOUSE — NIGHT. Meanwhile, with Kermit, they finally made it inside the house pretty easily)
Kermit: Nice digs.
(They later heard a knock at the door)
Kermit: Well, well. I wonder who that could be.
(Kermit opened the door, and Fozzie fell inside, after being beaten up by the pet bulldog)
Fozzie: Twinkle, twinkle little star!
Kermit: Shh! Everyone's sleeping.
Fozzie: I knew that.
Kermit: Come on, we gotta find Walter's basketball stuff.
(Kermit and Fozzie began to look around the house for her basketball stuff, but found nothing thus far)
Kermit: Nope. Nothing in here.
Fozzie: (looking in the family room) Not here. Ah, but a nice dinette set.
(Kermit looks in another room)
Kermit: Not here.
(Fozzie were about to look somewhere else, but Kermit called them upstairs)
Kermit: Let's look upstairs.
Fozzie: Yes, oh, fearless leader. So she needs her special underwear.
(As Kermit and Fozzie were talking, they walked into Jodi's room, seeing her room filled with posters of her favorite musicians, and a few Muppets merchandise)
Fozzie: You think she's got enough toys?
KERMIT: Speaking of toys, you know all those mugs and t-shirts and lunch boxes with our pictures on them?
Fozzie: Yes.
KERMIT: You ever see any money from all that stuff?
FOZZIE: Ha. Not a cent.
(Upon hearing their voices, Jodi woke up to see Kermit the Frog and Fozzie Bear at her own home)
KERMIT: Hmm. Me neither.
FOZZIE: It's a crying shame. We gotta get new agents. We're getting screwed.
(As Jodi peeked her head out of her room, Kermit and Fozzie walked into yet another room, hopefully a room that had Walter's basketball stuff)
KERMIT: We have found the trophy room.
(INT. TROPHY ROOM — NIGHT.)
Kermit: Now, spread out and search that place.
Fozzie: Yes, Kermit. It has gotten too far that I have to take orders from the frog prince.
Kermit: Yap, yap, yap.
(He found the basketball jersey)
Kermit: Hmm. This could be useful.
(Meanwhile, Fozzie were looking through one of the drawers)
Fozzie: Well, I could go back to being a door-to-door salesman. Well, that's very nice.
(Kermit then found another part of Walter's basketball gear)
Kermit: Oh, one of her shoes.
(He put the shoe in the gym bag)
Kermit: What is that other shoe? Where are you?
(Kermit later found it on a stand near one of Walter's trophies)
Kermit: Eureka!
(He pulled up a chair to get the other shoe)
Kermit: Come to Papa.
(As Kermit did this, Jodi looked inside the trophy room to see Kermit and Fozzie getting Walter's basketball gear for their game)
Kermit: (nearly slipped) Oops.
Fozzie: What a fuzz-foot. You are so clumsy.
(Kermit pushed the shoe into the gym bag)
Kermit: Catch, comedy bear.
Fozzie: Thanks.
(After that, Jodi closed the door, and went to tell the cousins what was going on in the trophy room)
Kermit: Well, time to go.
Fozzie: Did we get everything?
(They stopped, because they realized that they had forgotten something)
Kermit & Fozzie (Both): The shorts.
(They turned to the door)
KERMIT: In there?
Fozzie: Okay, I'll check.
(When Fozzie opened the door, he saw Charles holding the shorts in his mouth as he growled at Fozzie, causing him to quickly close the door)
Fozzie: I found the shorts.
(Charles then busted inside the room, landing the door on Fozzie)
Fozzie: The pain.
(He quickly got up, and went behind Kermit)
Fozzie: I'm right behind you, amigo.
Kermit: Uh, that's none too reassuring.
Fozzie: Nice puppy.
(Charles began to get closer to them as Kermit and Fozzie tried to find something to calm her down)
Fozzie: (holding up a bone) How about a bone? No dice.
(During this time, Jodi, Mike, and Mark all peeked their heads through the door to see Kermit and Fozzie worrying that Charles might kill them)
Kermit: (pulling out a ham) What about a nice holiday ham?
(Charles did not take it, and was still growling at them)
Kermit: He ain't buying it. Can't we talk this over?
Fozzie: Down, Beethoven.
Kermit: (back to his cool demeanor) Ooh. The kids are here.
(Jodi, Mike, and Mark all rushed inside the trophy room, and Mike tried to get the shorts out of Charles' mouth)
Mike: Give it to me, Charles.
(He finally got them out after a minute of fighting, and handed the shorts to Kermit)
Mike: Here you go, Kermit.
Kermit: Thanks, kid.
Mark: Shoo. Shoo.
(Charles walked away with a whimper)
Fozzie: Bad dog. That is the last time I'm ever working with dogs or children.
(Kermit just rolled his eyes as he and Fozzie began to leave)
Kermit: Bye-bye.
Mike: Hey, where are you going?
Kermit: Well, uh, you see, the Muppets have a big basketball game coming up and, uh, your friend's gonna play.
Mike: All right.
Kermit: Yeah. But don't tell anybody.
(He and Fozzie left. Mike nodded his head as Kermit closed the door)
(INT. PSYCHIC MEDIUM'S FORTUNE LAIR — NIGHT. The five NBA players were visiting a psychic medium to see what was up with their skills in their recent NBA games. The psychic medium looked in a crystal ball and began to get a vision)
Psychic Medium: (PSYCHIC HUMMING) I see aliens. Little aliens from outer space. They forced their way inside your bodies. They need your talent to win a basketball game against... Kermit the Frog.
PATRICK: (WHISPERS) Kermit the Frog?
Psychic Medium: I also see Walter Jordan, being sucked down the golf hole by the Muppets.
Patrick: That's it.
(He and the others began to leave)
Patrick: We're out of here. We're leaving now.
Shawn: (to Muggsy) Let's try some acupuncture.
Muggsy: Good idea.
(He waved to the psychic)
Muggsy: Bye.
(EXT. GOLF HOLE, GOLF HILLS — NIGHT. Tulip searched in nearly all of the golf holes, but she still couldn't find her friend after so many attempts. She was worried that she might never get to see her again)
TULIP: This is it. This is it. I don't know where you are, Walt, but wherever you are you obviously enjoy being there more than spending time with me.
(Kermit and Fozzie were walking back to the golf hole as they were carrying Walter's basketball gear)
Fozzie: You better hope this Walter character still know how to play hoops.
KERMIT: You and me both, brother.
(Wondering where those voices were coming from, Tulip peeked her heads over the golf hole, and saw Kermit and Fozzie walking to one of the golf holes)
FOZZIE: Listen, how is this for a new team name: The Bears.
KERMIT: Please. What kind of Mickey Mouse or SpongeBob organization would name their own team the Bears?
FOZZIE: So, sue me. It's just a suggestion.
(Kermit moved the golf pole as he and Fozzie went down into the hole to get back to Muppet Land, as Tulip watched in surprise and decided to follow them. Maybe this 'Muppet Land' could be where her friend might be!)
(INT. STORYTELLER GYMNASIUM — NIGHT. Gonzo, Fozzie, Scooter, Animal, Lew Zealand, Rowlf, Rizzo, Pepé, Dr. Teeth, and Beaker were working out to an old-school Richard Simmons tape in a TV. How did they get this tape? It was probably in one of their archives)
Richard: You're doing it. You're becoming mighty. Go!
SCOOTER: Come on, guys. No pain, no gain.
Richard: I don't hear it. What is it?
(The Muppets continued working out)
LEW ZEALAND: Come on.
Scooter: Come on.
(Kermit peeked out through the gym doors to introduce Walter a new wardrobe to the Muppets)
Kermit: Eh, guys?
Muppets (All): Yes?
Kermit: Look who's finally ready to play?
(Camilla, Gonzo, Pepé, Fozzie, Piggy, Beaker, and Scooter all looked in awe at Tink in his basketball uniform)
Walter: Let's see if I remember how to do this.
(He began to show her skills as Seal's "Fly Like An Eagle" plays in the background)
Seal: Fly like an eagle
To the sea
Fly like an eagle
Let my spirit carry me,
I wanna fly
Fly right into the future
Time keeps on slippin'
Into the future...
(During the song, Walter began to show his basketball skills on the court, impressing the Muppets. At one point, Fozzie's eyes even resembled one of Walter's basketball dunks)
(As Walter made another dunk, everyone in the gym began to hear the clapping from someone. They all turned to see that the clapping was coming from Tulip)
Tulip: (CHUCKLES) Walter!
(Walter looked up in surprise and saw his publicist fly up to him)
Tulip: Is it really you? Oh! Thank God you're all right. Oh! I was so worried.
(As Tulip hugged her friend, the Muppets, in the background, were all wondering how Tulip got down here and who they even were)
Walter: Come on, Tulip. Don't hug me, please.
Tulip: Sorry.
Walter: What are you doing here?
Tulip: I gotta take you back. You got baseball practice.
Walter: I can't. I'm helping my friends in their basketball game.
(Tulip turned to see Kermit, Gonzo, Piggy, Scooter, Rowlf, Pepé, Rizzo, and Sam Eagle in the background, all of whom were waving at them)
Tulip: Walt, you know that your friends are the Muppet characters?
(Walter thought about it for a moment)
Walter: Yeah. So?
Tulip: Doesn't bother you, it doesn't bother me. Let me help. Let me help. I can help.
Walter: What can you do?
(Tulip began to dribble the basketball, doing some crossovers)
Tulip: Well, you know, I mean, I may not be very tall, but I'm slow.
Rowlf: And large.
Gonzo: And a dork.
Tulip: We'll do anything, Tink. Anything.
Walter: Anything?
Tulip: Anything.
Walter: Come here. Come here for a second.
(He led Tulip to the bench, sitting her next to Sam Eagle)
Walter: Sit right here.
Tulip: Okay.
(She began to applaud for them)
Tulip: All right. All right, let's go, team. (CHUCKLES) If somebody gets injured, we could see a lot of minutes.
Sam: I'm a cheerleader.
(EXT. SWAMP, CALIFORNIA — NIGHT. The shadows grew long on the glassy water. But one shadow moved with a life of its own. It had just found some broken bits of colored balloons at the bottom of a tree. The shadow let out a call that echoed through the bayou, and in an instant, other shadows joined it)
(INT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — NIGHT. Naveen, Tiana, Louis, and Ray were enjoying a lovely night)
RAY: ...you going to see a blind nutria. You say, "Hello." And he say, "What?" And you say, "That's a ugly fish."
(ALL LAUGHING)
Tiana: Anyone for seconds?
Naveen: That was magnificent! You truly have a gift.
Tiana: Why, thank you.
(She was a bit surprised by the compliment coming from Naveen)
(Everyone lazed happily on the riverbank after the big meal. Ray and Louis were starting dreamily into the night sky when Ray suddenly called out)
Ray: (GASPS) This she is. The sweetest firefly in all creation.
Tiana: Evangeline?
(Louis sat up)
Louis: I want to meet this girl. Where she at?
Ray: How you can miss her? She's glowing right up there in front of y'all.
(They all looked up, but the only thing they could see were the stars twinkling in the sky. Then it hit them: Ray was in love with Evangeline)
Ray: (SINGING) Look how she lights up the sky
Ma belle Evangeline
Louis: (LAUGHS) That ain't no fire...
(He is hit on the head by Naveen)
Naveen: Shh!
Ray: So far above me, yet I
Know her heart belongs to only me
I adore you. I love you, Evangeline.
You're my queen of the night
So still, so bright
That someone as beautiful as she
Could love someone like me
(Naveen extended his hand to Tiana)
Tiana: No. I don't dance.
Ray: Love always find a way, it's true
Tiana: I've never danced.
Ray: And I love you, Evangeline
(Naveen smiled and gave her a twirl)
Naveen: If I can mince, you can dance.
(Tiana smiled as she and Naveen glided over lily pads and under the placid bayou water to Louis's sweet music. Tiana closed her eyes as Naveen led her in the dance)
RAY: Love is beautiful
Love is wonderful
Love is everything
Do you agree?
Mais' oui!
Look how she lights up the sky
I love you, Evangeline
(But when Naveen leaned in for a kiss, Tiana opened her eyes and jumped back)
Tiana: Ah! Lottie's getting herself one heck of a dance partner. We best be pushing on.
(Naveen was nodding sadly when a dark shadow fell over him and began dragging him off)
Naveen: (SCREAMS) Tiana!
Tiana: Naveen!
(More shadows descended on him and yanked him away)
RAY: No, no, no!
(Tiana chased after the shadows. She grabbed Naveen by the arms and tried to pull him back)
(Louis appeared and joined Tiana in a tug-of-war with the evil shadow)
(Ray grabbed on to Louis's tail and added his weight to the battle)
(Suddenly–FOOM! FOOM! FOOM!–several blinding flashes of light destroyed the shadows one by one)
(Tiana, Louis, and Ray looked up. An enormous, frightening silhouette was moving over a slope near a tree. They shivered in fear as the shape grew larger and larger. Then suddenly, a tiny old Creole woman appeared. She blew the smoke from the gourd she carried with her and placed her hand on her hip as she came to a stop at the base of a large tree)
(They noticed that she was as wide as she was tall about four feet in each direction. She was wearing sunglasses and had a big snake draped around her neck. They did not need to be told who this strange figure was. It was the one and only MAMA ODIE)
Mama Odie: Not bad for a 197-year-old blind lady. (CHUCKLING)
(She was proud of still being able to push a few shadows around at her age)
(She walked toward the group of friends)
Mama Odie: Now which one of you naughty children been messing with the Shadow Man?
(Louis quickly pointed to Naveen. Mama Odie nodded as though the alligator was only confirming what she already knew)
(INT. SHRIMP BOAT, TREE — NIGHT. Mama Odie led them into the shrimp boat lodged in the gnarled branches of a nearby tree. She had turned the marooned boat into a house)
TIANA: We're so glad we found you, Mama Odie. Ray and Louis here have been telling us all about you. We've been traveling quite a long way, and you can't imagine what we've been through. And we... And we heard that you...
Mama Odie: Juju!
(She put her face up to the big snake's to get a kiss)
Mama Odie: (LAUGHS) Come on over here, you bad boy. Give us a little sugar, now.
Louis: (GAGGING)
Mama Odie: You just loves your mama, don't you? Good to see you again, Ray. How's your grandmama?
Ray: She's fine. Got in a little trouble for flashing the neighbors again.
Mama Odie: Oooh, I like that gal's spunk! (LAUGHING)
(As Mama Odie settled into a chair, Tiana nervously cleared her throat and gathered her courage to speak)
Tiana: Mama Odie. We don't want to take up too much of your time...
Mama Odie: Y'all want some candy?
(She reached into her pocket. She pulled out some lint, some loose change, and an old piece of candy)
Naveen: (STUTTERING) Not really.
Tiana: No, thank you.
Mama Odie: Now, that's too bad. It's a special candy.
(She popped the candy into her mouth)
Mama Odie: Would have turned y'all human.
Naveen & Tiana (Both): Wait! Don't! Please don't take it! No! Please!
Mama Odie: I'm just messing with y'all.
Tiana: How on Earth did you know that we wanted to turn back...
(Mama Odie interrupted with a snore. She had dozed off. Naveen tapped on her nose)
Naveen: Mama Odie?
Mama Odie: (waking suddenly) Juju! Why didn't you tell me my gumbo was burning?
(Mama Odie waddled over to the stove)
Louis: You sure this is the right queen who lives in the boat in a tree?
Ray: Pretty sure.
Mama Odie: Can't believe this. Got to do everything around here.
(Tiana and Naveen hopped over to the stove)
Tiana: Mama Odie, if you...
Mama Odie: Taste this!
(She shoved a spoonful of gumbo into Tiana's mouth)
Mama Odie: Well?
Tiana: Hit it hard with a couple of shots of Tabasco and it's the bee's knees. Now, can we...
Mama Odie: Juju!
(Quick as a flash, the snake brought a bottle of hit sauce and poured it into the gumbo)
(Mama Odie gave it a taste)
Mama Odie: (EXCLAIMING) That's got some zang to it! That's just what it needed. Now, you figure out what you need?
Tiana: It's just like you said, mama. We need to be human.
Mama Odie: (SCOFFS) Y'all ain't got the sense you was born with! Y'all want to be human but you're blind to what you need!
Naveen: What we want? What we need? Is all the same thing, yes? (EXCLAIMS IN PAIN)
Mama Odie: Is the same thing? No! You listen to your mama now.
(SINGING) Don't matter what you look like
Don't matter what you wear
How many rings you got on your finger
We don't care
Heron Choir: (No we don't care)
Don't matter where you come from
Don't even matter you are
A dog, a pig, a cow, a goat
Had them all in here (we had them all in here)
And they all knew what they wanted
What they wanted me to do
I told them what they needed
Just like I be telling you
You got to dig a little deeper
Find out who you are
You got to dig a little deeper
It really ain't that far
When you find out who you are
You'll find out what you need
Blue skies and sunshine guaranteed
You got to dig (Dig)
You got to dig (Dig)
Prince Froggy is a rich little boy
You want to be rich again
That ain't going to make you happy now
Did it make you happy then? No!
Money ain't got no soul
Money ain't got no heart
All you need is some self-control
Make yourself a brand new star!
You got to dig a little deeper
Don't have far to go
You got to dig a little deeper
Tell the people mama told you so
Can't tell you what you'll find
Maybe love will grant you peace of mind
Dig a little deeper and you'll know
MAMA ODIE: Miss Froggy.
Tiana: Ma'am?
Mama Odie: Might I have a word?
Tiana: Yes, ma'am?
Mama Odie: You're a hard one, that's what I heard
Your daddy was a loving man
Family through and through
You're the daddy's daughter
What he had in him you got in you
You got to dig a little deeper
For you it's going to be tough
You got to dig a little deeper
You ain't go near far enough
Going down deep inside yourself
You'll find out what you need
Blue skies and sunshine guaranteed
Open up the windows
Let in the light children
(Blue skies and sunshine)
(Blue skies and sunshine)
Tiana: Blue skies and sunshine
Mama Odie: Guaranteed
Heron Choir: (Ahhh...)
Mama Odie: Well, Miss Froggy, do you understand what you need now, child?
Tiana: Yes. I do, Mama Odie. I need to dig a little deeper and work even harder to get my restaurant.
(The groan from the crowd ensured)
Ray: All right, y'all, one more time! (SINGING) It don't matter what you look like it don't... Nobody is going to sing with Ray? Okay.
Mama Odie: Well, if y'all set on being human, there's only one way.
(INT. SHRIMP BOAT — DAWN. Mama Odie walked back to the stove and stirred the gumbo with her gourd. The thick meal started to glow)
Mama Odie: Gumbo, gumbo in the pot. We need a princess, what you got?
(A vision appeared in the gumbo, and Mama Odie let Tiana take a look. Tink sees Charlotte primping in front of a mirror)
Tiana: Lottie? But she's not a princess.
Mama Odie: Hush up and look at the gumbo.
(Tinker Bell gazed back at the gumbo and saw Charlotte still sleeping. Suddenly, the door of her bedroom opened. There was Big Daddy, grinning from ear to ear)
Big Daddy: Ta-da!
(He was dressed like a king. And he was carrying a crown on a pillow. Charlotte took one look at the crown and eagerly placed it atop her head. Then she gave Big Daddy a kiss of gratitude)
TIANA: That's right. Big Daddy's King of Mardi Gras parade. So that makes Charlotte a princess.
Naveen: Does that count?
Mama Odie: Yes, it does, but only till midnight when Mardi Gras is over.
(As the gumbo vision disappeared, Naveen thought about what they had just seen: a princess who could kiss a frog–and break the spell! Mama Odie turned to Kermit)
Mama Odie: Hop-along, you only got till then to get that princess to kiss you. Once she does, boom! (MAMA ODIE CHUCKLES) Y'all both turn human!
Naveen: Midnight?
Tiana: That doesn't give us much time at all.
Louis: What about me, Mama Odie? I want to be human, too, so I can play jazz with the big boys. I want fingers and toes and a bellybutton. Not the kind that sticks out but the kind that goes in.
Mama Odie: Jabber Jaws, you dig a little deeper and you'll find everything you need. Come on, come on, come on. There's a lot of river between here and Anaheim. Y'all best get to swimming.
Louis: Wait! I got a better idea.
(EXT. GREAT WESTERN FORUM — DAY. There was a grand news conference at the Great Western Forum for updates on the remainder of the NBA season. It was unknown whether the season would continue, of if the season would be temporarily stopped until further notice)
FOREMAN: Mr. Commissioner, we've got the place sealed off.
(The health commissioner calms the media down)
Health Commissioner: Quiet! Ladies and gentlemen, please, quiet! Listen. After meeting with team owners, I have decided that until we can guarantee the health and safety of our NBA players, there will be no more basketball this season.
(This caused the press and news people to continue crowding the stadium, wanting to know even more information about what was going on with the NBA players)
(However, it looked like there would be a big basketball game down in Muppet Land with the Ultimate Game between the Muppet Squad and the MonStars. The battle of "good vs. evil" is about to begin)
(Unless...)
(EXT. VIDIA'S HOUSE — DAY. Tink flew toward Vidia's house, which was in a lone sour-plum tree perched on the edge of a craggy slope)
(Vidia opened the door. Her eyes grew wide when she saw Tinker Bell)
(Tink gave her a pleading smile)
Tinker Bell: Will you teach me how to be a fast-flying fairy?
(Vidia answered by slamming the door in Tink's face)
(Tink knocked insistently)
Tinker Bell: Please? I know I could do it! With your help, I could be flying as fast as you in no time.
(There was no answer)
(Tink slumped against the door)
Tinker Bell: Vidia, you're my last hope. All my friends have given up on me. Rosetta won't even try to teach me to be a garden fairy now.
(Still no answer. Tink went on, mostly talking to herself)
Tinker Bell: I bet I could at least paint some flowers or plant some sproutlings. I mean, there must be something I could do.
(The door opened. Tink jumped, startled. Vidia stood there with her arms crossed and a sly smile on her face)
Vidia: Or if you really want to be a garden fairy…
(EXT. NEEDLEPOINT MEADOW — DAY. Needlepoint Meadow was deserted. Rogue breezes blew in every direction, tossing Tink's hair as she built out of twigs. It had high walls and a sturdy gate. She stepped back to admire it)
(Tink didn't like what Vidia had suggested. But she had to admit it was a good idea—if she could pull it off)
(If Vidia's plan worked, Tink would be the first fairy in the history of Anaheim to capture the Sprinting Thistles. No one could argue she didn't have garden talent after that!)
(Suddenly, Tink caught a glimpse of something running past her. When she tried to see what it was, it disappeared into the landscape)
(Then something ran the other way)
(Again, she turned her head)
(Again, she saw nothing)
(This place was giving her the creeps. Cheese was scared, too. He cowered in the back of the corral)
Tinker Bell: Capture the sprinting thistles. Well, okay. I can do this. Yeah! Okay. Ready, Cheese? Come on. They're just weeds.
(Tink scolded the mouse, trying to make him—and herself—feel braver)
(Tink flew up and settled into the saddle on Cheese's back. She tested a flaxen lasso, twirling it with ease)
Tinker Bell: Besides, there were only seven or eight at the most, right?
(She snapped the reins, but Cheese didn't budge)
Tinker Bell: We can do this. I know we can do this. What do you say? Attaboy.
(She forces him out into the meadow. They galloped over the grass, going faster and faster)
Vidia: This ought to be good.
(A couple of Thistles popped up from their hiding places and ran)
(Aha!)
(Tink and Cheese maneuvered around the Thistles. Tink guided them toward them toward the corral with some twigs she had fashioned into prods)
(It worked like a charm)
TINKER BELL: Come on, you! Oh, come on!
(Two more Thistles rose from their hiding places, and they all ran into the corral)
Tinker Bell: Just a bit this way! It's working! It's working!
(She slammed the corral's gate, closing the Thistles in. Then she and Cheese quickly galloped back into the meadow to find more Thistles)
(Tink never noticed Vidia, who flew up and spun around the corral, creating a whirlwind that blew the gate open)
(The Thistles ran out of the gate just as Tink came galloping back, driving a new group toward the corral)
Tinker Bell: Wait, wait, wait. Come back! Come back!
(They rushed right past her, breaking her twig-prods. Ten more Thistles popped up and joined the herd)
(By now, the putter-patter of Thistle feet was turning into a rumble. Tink began to get a bad feeling)
Tinker Bell: These things just won't listen! Come on, Cheese. Go, go, go!
(She looked back over her shoulder, and her eyes grew large with horror)
(There were hundreds of Thistles now—all galloping toward her!)
(Tink tried to swallow her panic)
Tinker Bell: Okay, definitely more than eight. Please file into the corral in an orderly manner!
(CRASHHH!)
(The Thistles washed over the tiny corral like a tidal wave, and the carefully constructed fence collapsed into a pile of splinters)
(Tink twirled her lasso over her head and took off after the Thistles at full gallop)
Tinker Bell: Wait!
(But they weren't listening. The Thistle stampede flooded down the path. Tink's heart sank into her pom-pommed slippers when she realized where they were going. They were heading toward Springtime Square!)
Tinker Bell: Oh, no! Come on!
(Cheese leaped forward, and he and Tinker Bell pounded along the path of destruction the a Thistles had left behind them)
(EXT. ANAHEIM, VARIOUS — DAY. The Thistles rumbled through Sunflower Meadow. Tinker Bell and Cheese followed close behind. As they tried to catch up to the stampede, Tink spared a glance around her)
(Light fairies and fireflies had scattered in every direction, leaping for cover and clinging to the undersides of the tall flowers. The Thistles had sheared off low-hanging petals and leaves. The fireflies were trembling, their glows winked out from fright)
TINKER BELL: Sorry. Sorry. Excuse me. So sorry.
(The Thistles kept running. They were heading toward Lilypad Pond, where the water fairies were happily showering their lilies. The fairies had no idea what lay in store for them)
(RRRRUMBLE! The Thistles charged through Lilypad Pond, knocking lilies over and scattering water fairies in every direction. Tink and Cheese hopped over the remaining lily pads. Fairies glared at her in shocked outrage from every corner of the pond)
(But the Thistles were already charging toward the Flower Garden, where flower fairies watched with pride as rows of little bulbs awaited inspection)
(The baby bulbs scattered. Some ran for cover on their rooty feet. Others dug holes in the ground and jumped inside before the Thistles could run them over)
(Up ahead in Flutterby Forest, dozens of freshly painted ladybugs were waiting for their final spots)
Rosetta: This is the last branch.
(Then she looked up at the Thistles coming right for her)
GARDEN FAIRY: Look out!
Tinker Bell: Sorry. Sorry!
(By now, Tinker Bell couldn't have stopped Cheese if she wanted to. The mouse was determined to stay on the trail of the Thistles. They rode through a cloud of terrified ladybugs, heading straight for Springtime Square, where the huge collection of spring supplies was waiting)
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – DAY. The square was filled with carefully staced pots of paint, bundles of seeds, baskets of bulbs, and sacks of pollen. Every fairy had worked her and his hardest for months to get to this point–ready for spring)
(Rosetta, Fawn, Iridessa, and Silvermist were standing with a group of nature fairies, admiring the preparations, when they looked up and saw disaster sweeping toward them)
Rosetta, Fawn, Iridessa, and Silvermist (All): Oh, no, the spring supplies! Not the flower paint! Save the seeds! The pollen, the pollen!)
(But there was nothing anyone could do)
(The awful Thistle stampede thundered through Springtime Square, destroying in its path)
(By the time the stampede broke up, the wreckage was complete)
(Every basket and bucket was broken)
(Seeds, paint, light, and scared little bulbs lay strewn everywhere)
(Fireflies had flickered out in fear)
(Ladybugs were splattered with every color of paint)
(And dazed nature fairies wandered around the devastation trying to take in what had just happened)
(When Clank and Bobble flew in and saw the mess, their eyes welled up with tears)
(The Minister of Spring picked up a surviving flower, but it wilted in his hand)
(Tinker Bell and Cheese slowed to a stop in the middle of the square. Tink slid off Cheese's back and stood on shaking legs)
Tinker Bell: (her voice was empty and hollow-sounding) Oh, no.
Fawn: Tink. What happened?
(Iridessa's hands were pressed against her mouth. She was too shocked to even make a comment)
Tinker Bell: I…
Rosetta: Tinker Bell, what did you think you were doing?
(Rosetta's voice was sharp. It was the first time Tinker Bell had heard her sound angry)
Tinker Bell: I was just… I was just trying to… I thought if I could capture the thistles, then…
(She trailed off, realizing how totally thoughtless she had been)
(Rosetta exploded)
Rosetta: There isn't a garden fairy alive who can control those weeds! What were you trying to prove?
Tinker Bell: I…
Silvermist: She's right, Tink. This has all gone too far.
(Queen Clarion came swirling into their midst in a bright, glittering cloud of pixie dust. Her face turned pale as she looked around, taking in the full scope of the disaster)
Clarion: By the second star! All the preparations for spring… How did this…
(Silvermist put a protective hand on Tink's arm)
(Tink was grateful, but she knew no one could help her now. She gently pulled her arm away and approached the queen with her heart pounding in her chest)
Tinker Bell: Queen Clarion, it was me. I did it. It was all my fault.
(There were gasps from the crowd, and some groans)
(Clarion raised her hands to her cheeks)
Clarion: Tinker Bell.
(But Tink couldn't defend her own silly and selfish behavior now)
Tinker Bell: (WEEPING) I… I'm sorry.
(Finally, she managed to choke out)
(Then she took to the air so that she wouldn't have to see the sad and disappointed eyes of her friends)
(INT. COUNCIL CHAMBER, PIXIE DUST HOTEL – NIGHT. That evening, at sunset, the Council of Seasons met in a cavernous chamber high in the Pixie Dust Hotel)
(Gathered there, among the leaf books and scrolls, were Clarion, her four season ministers, and Fairy Mary)
SPRING: I don't think we can fix this in time. We're going to have to cancel spring, or postpone it at the very least.
WINTER: What, and put my snowflake fairies back to work? Oh, no.
(The Minister of Summer, with eyes as green as grass, shook her head)
SUMMER: But we can't! We can't do that! If the snow isn't melted, the seedlings won't grow, the fruit won't ripen in the summer…
Autumn: And in the autumn, there will be nothing to harvest. Spring must happen on time, or the balance of nature will be undone!
Winter: There must be something we can do! Certainly this has happened before!
Spring: It has! Did you ever hear of the Ice Age?
(Clarion lifted her hands, asking for calm)
Clarion: Settle down, all of you. Fairy Mary, is it even possible to redo everything in such a short time?
(With a flick of her finger, Fairy Mary sent the last birdseed bead spinning across the abacus. Her calculations were complete)
Fairy Mary: No.
SPRING: Oh, no.
(The bead made a loud and final clack!)
Spring: We were so close, and now it's all gone.
SUMMER: Who's going to paint our leaves now?
AUTUMN: The apples and pumpkins will never grow.
SUMMER: No rolling hills covered in daffodils?
SPRING: And it took months to harvest all those seeds!
AUTUMN: Animals waking from hibernation will have nothing to eat!
(Clarion and Fairy Mary said nothing at all. The situation was just too awful for words)
(INT. PIXIE DUST WELL, PIXIE DUST TREE – EVENING. Meanwhile, far below the council chamber, Tink sat alone by the Pixie Dust Well, listening to the angry voices echoing overhead)
(How had things gone so wrong so fast?)
(A tear streaked down her cheek and fell into the glowing well)
(The sound of a footfall startled Tink, and she spun around. A figure emerged out of the dark. It was Terence, the handsome dust-keeper)
Terence: You okay, Tink?
Tinker Bell: Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I just came hoping to get a quick refill. I'm going away for a while.
Terence: Well, how long you going to be gone?
(Terence flew over to the well and dipped his ladle in)
(There was no point in lying, Tink realized. They'd all know soon enough. And she doubted anyone would try to stop her from going)
Tinker Bell: Well, actually, forever.
(Terence was taken aback, but he tried to hide it)
Terence: Forever? Well, (CHUCKLES) in that case,
(He dipped his ladie extra deep and brought it up heaping with dust)
Terence: a double scoop. Forever's a pretty long time, so I hear.
(He poured the dust over Tink's shoulders and wings, making them glitter and shine)
(Tinker Bell smiled)
Tinker Bell: Thanks, Terence.
(His were the first kind words she had heard in a while, and she felt a lump rise in her throat)
Terence: You know my name?
Tinker Bell: Well, sure. Why wouldn't I?
Terence: I don't know. I'm just a dust-keeper guy. I'm not exactly seen as the most important fairy in Anaheim.
Tinker Bell: Terence, what are you talking about?
(She was shocked to hear Terence describe himself in such lowly terms)
Tinker Bell: You're probably the most important one there is! Without you, no one would have any magic!
(Terence considered that for a moment and smiled. But Tink wasn't done yet)
Tinker Bell: Why, your talent makes you who you are! You should be proud of it! I mean…
Terence: I am.
(Tink's mouth fell open in surprise. No, she wasn't proud of herself right now. In fact, she was ashamed. But she wasn't ashamed because of what her talent was, she was ashamed because...)
Tinker Bell: (STAMMERING) I'd better get going.
(INT. TINKER WORKSHOP – NIGHT. That night, while the moonbeams played across the empty workshop of Tinkers' Nook. Tinker Bell was still thinking about Terence's words)
(She had been certain that the best thing she could do for Anaheim was to leave)
(But what if she was wrong–again?)
(Tinker Bell walked through the workshop, looking at the litter of tools, pots, kettles, and buckets. So many things to be mended. So many things to be made. So much to be done)
(Her fingers itched to take up a tool and begin working again. She smiled. How funny. After all her complaining, it turned out that she really did love tinkering)
(She felt something nuzzle her hand)
Tinker Bell: Hey, Cheese.
(She petted his head, still looking around)
(Over in one corner, she spotted her useless inventions. All her shame and doubt came pouring back)
Tinker Bell: "Be proud of your talent." What talent? I couldn't even get these silly things to work.
(She turned. A beam of moonlight streaming through the window reflected off something in the other corner of the room. Intrigued, Tink went to investigate. She pulled a taro aside and gasped)
Tinker Bell: Lost things.
(Piled underneath the tarp were all the things she had found. Fairy Mary had said her treasure were rubbish, but they still fascinated Tink)
(She picked up a tiny brass screw and admired its smooth, shiny surface and it's even grooves. Tink's eyes darted back and forth between the screw and her inventions. She looked at the way the screw was made, how the spiraling threads might help fasten pieces together)
(Suddenly, she had an idea)
(Not just one idea–a bunch of ideas. Her heart started to race)
Tinker Bell: That's it!
(There wasn't much time)
(She would have to hurry)
(INT. JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS, MUPPET LAND — DAY. "Pump Up the Jam" by Technotronic plays. The line at the Jim Henson Memorial Gardens were crowded with nothing but Muppet characters and Sesame Street characters and Fraggle Rock characters)
(INT. MUPPETS' LOCKER ROOM, JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS — DAY. As they were all riding up to the stadium, trying to find good seats for the game, the Muppet Squad was preparing for the upcoming game in the locker room. Piggy tied some tape around her hands, Kermit was getting dressed, Dr. Teeth tied a rope around his head, Animal was spinning into his uniform, Rowlf, Rizzo, and Pepé were jump roping while Rizzo puts on war paint. Gonzo, for whatever reason, was dressed up in an outfit composed of random objects and whatnot)
Gonzo: Just get out of my way.
(Walter was getting dressed in their Muppet Squad, and looked at their team (Dr. Teeth, Kermit, Lew Zealand, Animal, Floyd) with looks of confidence)
Walter: Ready?
Muppets (All): Yes!
Walter: Let's go.
(INT. JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS — DAY. The citizens of Muppet Land were in the stadium, cheering for the home team, the Muppet Squad. Mr. Swackhammer is seated in a booth with a good view, and his little Nerdluck slaves were watching)
Swackhammer: Are these the best seats? Like them. Yes. Can see everything from here. Very good.
(INT. BOOTH, JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS — DAY. The announcer was busy sleeping, but luckily, LOUIS KAZAGGER and BOBO THE BEAR grabbed a hold of the microphone, and decided to do the play-by-play commentary)
Bobo: Okay. Ready to go?
Louis Kazagger: Yeah, yeah, sure. Riot.
(He then cleared his throat and spoke in an actual announcer's voice)
Louis Kazagger: (IN DEEP VOICE) Ladies and gentlemen, the starting lineup for the Muppet Squad.
(INT. JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS — DAY. Animal made his entrance)
Louis Kazagger: (V.O.) Standing 2-foot-4, the Crazy Drummer of the Tennessee's: Animal of the Electric Mayhem.
(Animal tosses two basketballs into the air, then grabbing them with his mouth, popping them in the process, then ran off)
Louis Kazagger: (V.O.) At small forward, standing a scintillating 3-foot-2, the Hog of the Divas: Miss Piggy.
(The audience hooted, cheered, and even whistled at her. Piggy received a ball from a fan, dribbled and tossed it, and spun it on her finger)
Louis Kazagger: (V.O.) At power forward, the Teddy of the Comedies: Fozzie Bear.
(Fozzie comes out)
FOZZIE: Thank you. Thank you.
(But the audience went silent and the only sounds being made was a birds chirping and a man coughing)
Fozzie: (sarcastically) Very funny. Let's all laugh at the weirdo.
(Then, the lights dimmed and the crowd began to stomp and clap to Queen's "We Will Rock You". This is probably due to one of the more-popular Muppets coming out)
Louis Kazagger: (V.O.) And at point guard, standing 3-foot-3, 4 feet if you include the tongue, co-captain of the Muppet Squad, The Doctor of Delight: Kermit the Frog.
(Kermit popped out, receiving mad applause from the audience)
Kermit: Thank you. Thank you. Yay!
(The only ones who were booing at him were the Nerdlucks, who were watching with Swackhammer)
Louis Kazagger: And now, the player-coach of the Muppet Squad, at 6-foot-6, from Smalltown, his Royal Airness: Walter Jordan.
("Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)" by C.C. Music Factory is heard as Walter smiled and ran towards their teammates (Rowlf, Animal, Gonzo, Kermit, Sam, Piggy, Pepé, Dr. Teeth, Lew Zealand), receiving mad from the audience)
Swackhammer: Who? Is he a Muppet?
Nerdluck: Uh... Uh, well, perhaps.
(Walter gathered the team (Pepé, Sam, Kermit, Rowlf, Animal, Gonzo) into a huddle, placing their hands out, and the Muppet Squad placed their hands on her)
Walter: You guys ready?
Fozzie: I'm set to take it to the rack, Jack.
Pepé: Those MonStars will wish they'd never been born.
Walter: Guys, let's just go out and have fun.
Muppets (All): Yeah!
(The lights moved onto the side)
ANNOUNCER: The challengers for the Ultimate Game, all the way from Moron Mountain: The MonStars.
(The Muppet Squad turned their heads, and saw the few of them showing off with half of the audience cheering and booing at them. The lights came on and the teams began to get to their positions. Walter looked at the MonStars and they were in their street mode, but they did not scare Walter)
Bang: What are you looking at?
(Pound growled at Animal, making him pass out: Poor little guy. Walter went up to the center and Blanko did not any signs of hostility, neither did Nawt)
Blanko: (CHUCKLES) Cool shoes.
(MASTERSON THE RAT, the game's referee came to the center with the basketball in his hand)
Masterson: Ready?
(He tossed the ball up, while Blanko and Walter jumped up to get it. He knocked the ball away from Blanko, whizzing past Pound's head as Kermit caught it)
Kermit: l got it, I got it, I got it. I got the ball. I got the ball.
(Pound backhanded him really hard after he was dribbling, sending him to the floor. Walter winced as Pound received the ball and dunked, scoring two points for the MonStars)
Swackhammer: Way to go, boys. Did you see the moves on that one?
(Masterson tossed it to Animal, who passed it to Walter. He was dribbling the ball and the MonStars surrounded him)
BANG: Come on, show me something. Come on, show me something.
(Pound blocked Walter with his arms out and tried to get past him, but Walter instead passed the ball to Fozzie, so he could score)
Fozzie: Whoops.
Bupkus: The bear.
(He and the other MonStars began to go after Fozzie, scaring him because he basically had nowhere else to go)
BUPKUS: Yeah, beat up on the bear.
Pound: Get that bear, man!
(Fozzie instead tossed the ball to the bench where the other team members, Sam and Tulip were sitting. Sam caught it, and the MonStars saw the ball and they dog-piled on the other! Sam was in a tangled mess and he saw spangled stars flying around his head)
Sam: Oh, my.
(Piggy gave Fozzie a long stare as he made an excuse in his defense)
Fozzie: He was wide open.
(Piggy just rolled his eyes, and walked back to his position. The MonStars had the ball now as Pound passed it to Nawt, who speeded past Piggy, and passed it to Bupkus, who dunked and scored)
(Now, Walter had the ball, and was dribbling it to the other side)
NAWT: Watch it, coming your way. Watch out, watch out.
(Nawt tried to block Walter, but he went past the red alien with ease)
BANG: Get her.
(She made his way to the hoop, where Pound and Bang were waiting. They tired to block the ball away from her as she dunked, but she made it into the hoop, and earned her team two points)
(MonStars: 06, Muppet Squad: 02)
(The little aliens were giving Swackhammer a massage, and they all saw Walter score two points for the Muppet Squad)
Swackhammer: How does she do that?
(He was angry at that move and pounded his fist on the table. The MonStars had the ball as Blanko passed it to Pound and Scooter complimented)
Scooter: Nice shot, Mr. J.
(She noticed Pound passing the ball to Nawt and he was making his way over to Bupkus)
Walter: Hey, hey, come on. Get back on defense.
(They tried to stop Nawt, but they were too late. Nawt passed it to Bupkus, and scored two points as the aliens with Swackhammer cheered, and did a little victory dance)
Swackhammer: Way to go!
(It was now the second quarter and the MonStars continued to beat the Muppets)
Kermit: Air B! Air B!
(He passed the ball to Walter. He caught and looked at the MonStars)
MonStars: Red light.
Pepé: Feed me. Feed me.
(Rowlf grabbed him)
Rowlf: Feed you? Feed me.
(He stuffed Pepé into his mouth. Walter managed to throw the ball to Rowlf and hit him in the stomach, making him spit Pepé out)
Pepé: Bad dog.
(Pound picked up the ball)
POUND: I'll take that, thank you.
(He made his way to the hoop)
Pound: Don't try this at home.
(Pound then dunked the ball, earning his team two more points. Lew Zealand got the ball and was dribbling the ball with ease, singing to himself)
Lew Zealand: (SINGING) I wish I was in the land of cott...
(However, Bang blocked his path, standing on fours like a lion about to pounce)
Bang: You going somewhere?
(Lew Zealand stopped)
Lew Zealand: May I remind you, sir, that physical violence is patently against the rules.
(Bang took a deep breath, arched his neck, and blew fire out of his mouth like a dragon would. Lew Zealand was burnt to a crisp)
Lew Zealand: Yeow! (old Kentucky Fried Chicken saying) Did you order Original Recipe or Extra Crispy?
(The boomerang fish dissolved into ashes on the court. Walter walked over to the bench to pick another player)
Walter: Let's go.
(She did not expect BEAN BUNNY to come out on the court, ready to play)
Bean Bunny: Me? Oh, boy. I'm ready. I can do this.
(He ran towards the court with a smile. Tulip, Rowlf, Animal, Dr. Teeth, and Beaker looked on, but Rowlf and Beaker snickered)
Tulip: The bunny? You picked the bunny?
(Bean Bunny ran over to the court and was talking Blanko's ear off)
Bean Bunny: I love basketball. I always have. Do you?
Blanko: Uh-huh.
Bean Bunny: You're big. I bet you're good.
Blanko: Right.
Bean Bunny: I'm small, but I'll try hard to be good.
Blanko: Okay. Yeah.
Bean Bunny: Really, I will. I always try hard. My mom says, "Try your best in everything you do..."
(However, Blanko accidentally dropped the ball, and squished Bean Bunny like a bug)
Crowd: Oh!
(Piggy was making her way to the basket and Pound and Bang were blocking her)
Pound: Try and get by me, doll.
Piggy: "Doll"?
(She leaped up, dribbled Pound's face with her sneakers, and dunked! The Muppet Squad at the bench cheered)
Piggy: Don't ever call me ''doll.''
Kermit: Nice shot.
Piggy: Thanks, Kermie.
(The MonStars had the ball now. Floyd has Bang at guitar point. Bupkus was dribbling the ball as Walter tried to block him. However, Pound came up from behind and grabbed Walter)
Pound: Where's your defense, boy? I got you right here.
(Bupkus made his way over the hoop)
Bupkus: 911.
(He jumped and dunked)
(Swackhammer was getting more and more excited, while the Nerdlucks were serving him breakfast)
Nerdluck: Piece of pie? Pork chop? Some sorbet, perhaps?
(The game went on as the MonStars were beating the Muppets)
(Muppet Squad: 18, MonStars: Kinda one-sided, isn't it?)
(Pound made his way to the hoop, jumped with a roar, and slammed the ball into the hoop)
(The buzzer buzzed as Masterson fired a gun to signal the half-time period)
Masterson: Half-time.
(The bullet blew a hole through Rowlf's stomach as Pepé jumped right through it)
Pepé: Holy dog.
(The Muppet Squad (Sam, Animal, Beauregard, Scooter, Kermit, Beaker, Piggy, Walter, Crazy Harry, Rowlf, Lew Zealand, Dr. Teeth, Janice) were all looking sad as the MonStars gave them mean faces and high-five each other)
BUPKUS: Yeah, man, we got it going on. One more half.
POUND: Right, man. We got them.
(The Muppet Squad (Gonzo, Sam, Animal, Beauregard, Walter, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Kermit, Piggy, Crazy Harry, Scooter, Beaker, Lew Zealand, Janice) were walking away with their heads hanging down in defeat)
Rowlf: Moron Mountain, here we come.
Dr. Teeth: We're gonna be slaves.
(Walter kept her head up)
Walter: Come on, guys, keep your heads up. Got a whole other half to play.
(Everyone (Lew Zealand, Zoot) walked away as Tulip snuck towards the MonStars' locker room to find out her secret. There was no way that they would be playing this good)
(The NEWSMAN is giving the speech in the court)
Newsman: This just in: The first half passed. The second half will start after Mardi Gras is over.
(EXT. MARK TWAIN RIVERBOAT — DAY. Tiana, Naveen, and Ray followed Louis into the broad, open channel of the river. They had to move fast to get to Charlotte before midnight. Finally, in the distance, they saw a stern-wheel steamboat cutting through the water. The big boat's lights glowed a soft pink as a lively jazz tune drifted through the night air)
(Ray flew out and surveyed the deck. Then he whistled a signal)
(Tiana and Naveen hopped off Louis and climbed up over the deck rail, looking around to make sure they would not be seen)
(Louis followed. Suddenly, the group heard some people coming around the corner)
Louis: They got guns!
(The two little frogs and Ray were able to hide, but not Louis! He was too big! The costume-clad musicians took one look at Fozzie and laughed)
Jaguar Guy: Man, that is one killer-diller costume!
Pig Guy: Hey, dude, can you blow that horn?
(Louis blows trumpet. This was his big chance! Barely hesitating, the bear followed them as they went off to play in a real band)
Ray: We can't miss this! Little Louis's going to finally play with the big boys!
(Smiling, Tiana and Ray followed, wanting to sneak a peek at Louis's big musical debut)
Tiana: Naveen, you coming?
Naveen: Oh! I'll catch up with you later.
(Naveen saw pieces in the ground. He picks it up and starts inventing)
(EXT. MARK TWAIN RIVERBOAT — DUSK. Meanwhile, Naveen walked into another direction and quickly fashioned a makeshift ring. Once he finished it, he held on to what he hoped would soon be Tiana's engagement ring. Then he looked up to the Evening Star)
Naveen: Oh, Evangeline. Why can't I just look Tiana in the eye and say, "I will do whatever it takes to make all your dreams come true because... Because I love you."?
(Just then, Ray appeared)
Ray: Whoa, whoa, whoa, cap! You making goo-goo eyes on my girl?
(Ray lifted his fists, prepared to fight for the honor of the girl that Naveen would love)
Ray: That does it! Put them up! I'm going to make some shoes out of you!
Naveen: No, Ray! I am not in love with Evangeline. I'm in love with Tiana!
(For a moment, everything stood still–even Ray. Then the firefly burst out)
Ray: Ooh! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! You come here, you.
Naveen: And I can no longer marry Miss Charlotte LaBouff.
Ray: You're going to be happy together!
Naveen: I'll find another way to get Tiana and the others a restaurant.
Ray: They're going to have the cutest little tadpole children!
Naveen: They will get a job. Maybe two. Maybe three.
Ray: I can't wait to tell chere!
Naveen: No, no, no. I must tell her. Alone.
Ray: Right, you rascal!
(EXT. MARK TWAIN RIVERBOAT — DUSK. When Naveen finally caught up with Tiana, he led her to a private corner of an upper deck)
TIANA: Where you taking me?
Naveen: I just wanted to show you a little something to celebrate our day together as lovers.
(He guided her to the top of the captain's cabin. The view was spectacular. Tiana gasped when she saw the beautiful table set with candles and food)
Tiana: (GASPS) Oh! All my years no one's ever done anything like this for me. (LAUGHS)
Naveen: It is too much, is it not? Thank you, Beaux.
Beaux: I thought it was a nice touch.
(Beaux flies off)
Naveen: Pretend you did not see that. Please, please, sit down.
(Naveen walks Tiana over to the table. Kermit sets the plate down)
Tiana: What's this?
(Naveen removes top from dish to reveal fries)
Naveen: Ta-da!
Tiana: You minced!
Naveen: I did! You have had quite an influence on me, which is amazing because I have dated thousands of women and... No, like two, three, just other women. And anyway, listen. You could not be more different, you know? You are practically, one of the guys. No, no, no. You are not a guy. Let me begin again.
(He leans on table, which made him fall and fries spilled over his head)
Naveen: I'm not myself tonight. Tiana! Sorry, that was loud. This is a disaster.
Tiana: No. It's cute. (CHUCKLES)
(Everything was perfect. Naveen was getting ready to present the ring)
Naveen: Tiana, I…
Tiana: (GASPS) There it is!
(Tiana burst out excitedly. Unaware of what Naveen was doing, she pointed to the shore. She could see the cottage)
Naveen: Your restaurant?
Tiana: Oh, can you just picture it? All lit up like the Fourth of July.
Naveen: Yes. Jazz pouring out from every window!
Tiana: It should be elegant.
Naveen: But you got to keep it loose, though. Got to let it swing.
Tiana: You know a good ukulele player?
Naveen: Really? You let me perform?
Tiana: I'll talk to the owner. Owner says yes.
Naveen: (EXCLAIMS)
Tiana: Folks are going to be coming together from all walks of life just to get a bit of our food.
Naveen: Our food?
Tiana: Huh? Oh, no. My daddy. We always wanted to open this restaurant. He died before he could see it happen. But tomorrow, with your help, our dream is finally coming true.
Naveen: Tomorrow?
Tiana: If I don't deliver that money first thing tomorrow, I lose this place forever.
Naveen: (SIGHS) Tiana, I love the way you light up when you talk about your dream. A dream that... It is so beautiful, I... I promise I will do whatever it takes to make it come true.
(The steamboat signaled its arrival at the docks)
Captain: (O.S.) Port of Anaheim, all ashore!
Naveen: I'll go round up the boys.
(He leaves. Alone, Tiana turned to look up at the Evening Star and spoke to her)
Tiana: (SIGHS) Evangeline, I've always been so sure about what I wanted, but now I… What do I do? Please tell me.
(Tiana simply couldn't understand why, when her lifelong dream was about to come true, she felt something else tugging at her heart)
(But Evangeline merely twinkled back at the confused princess. It was as if the star knew that Tiana had to figure this out by herself)
(On another part of the boat, a shadow slowly crept up between Naveen. The shadow latched on to the frog, and nobody was nearby to rescue him. A mass of shadows dragged him away)
(EXT. LABOUFF ESTATE — NIGHT. It was the biggest night of the year in Anaheim. It was Mardi Gras and Charlotte was dressed for the occasion. She had on the grandest wedding gown that any Mardi Gras princess had ever worn)
(She rushed across the LABOUFF estate and knocked excitedly on the door of the bachelor quarters)
Charlotte: Prince Naveen, darling. You better hurry up. Don't want to be late for our Mardi Gras wedding.
(Lawrence was still his roly-poly self and fretting wildly)
Lawrence: Um... Getting dressed! Just a few minutes, my dearest heart.
Charlotte: Okay, honey lamb. We'll been waiting in the Packard. Daddy, start the car!
(INT. BACHELOR QUARTERS, LABOUFF ESTATE — NIGHT.)
Lawrence: Oh, my heavens, I'm doomed!
(Dr. Facilier hits Lawrence with his card)
Lawrence: Ow!
Facilier: No, Larry! I'm the one who's doomed. Unless we get that frog's blood in…
(Suddenly, a loud rattle came from the window. The air chilled as Lawrence and Dr. Facilier turned and watched a swarm of ominous shadows slipping into the room)
(The shadows were dragging a green frog. It was Naveen)
Facilier: We are back in business, boys!
(Dr. Facilier grabbed Naveen)
Naveen: Get your filthy hands off me! Lawrence!
(Then Naveen recognized his valet)
Lawrence: (CHUCKLING) Oh, now hold still, Your Eminence.
(Lawrence approached Naveen, ready to use the frog to replenish the magic in his talisman. The valet had no intention of helping the froggy prince. Naveen was on his own)
(EXT. ANAHEIM — NIGHT. Meanwhile, Tiana was watching Louis proudly marching off the riverboat–with a band!)
All: (CHANTING) Mardi Gras! Mardi Gras!
(The Tiana saw Ray)
Tiana: Ray! Have you seen Naveen?
Ray: Look at you. Where the ring at?
Tiana: What are you talking about?
(Ray considered his options)
Ray: Well, if Cap didn't say anything, I ain't going to say nothing because old Ray's sealed up tight as a drum. You ain't getting nothing out of me, no!
Tiana: Ray.
Ray: Okay, Cap not going to marry Miss Charlotte, he going to marry you! Soon as he gets himself kissed and y'all both turn human, he's going to find a job, get you that restaurant... (GASPS) I said too much, didn't I?
Tiana: You said just enough, Ray! Thank you, Evangeline.
(Tiana raced off to find Naveen. Ray followed her. They reached the torchlit parade making its way down the street)
(EXT. STREET, ANAHEIM — NIGHT. Huge floats full of pirates and Arabian genies were being pulled by mules. Costumed revelers threw shiny colored beads into the cheering crowds)
(Tiana hopped through the crowd)
Tiana: He was trying to propose! That's what all that fumbling was about! And here I thought all he wanted was to marry a rich girl!
Ray: Chere! What are we looking for again?
Tiana: You just keep your eyes out for the biggest gaudiest float with a Mardi Gras princess about to kiss herself a... (GASPS) A frog.
(She saw a huge wedding cake float came down the street. On top was Charlotte dressed in her fabulous white gown, but next to her was no Naveen. Tiana froze. It was Prince Naveen–dashing, handsome, and human! And he was going to marry Charlotte! Somehow he must have already kissed her and become human, leaving Tiana to live the rest of her life as a frog)
Reverend: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today in this fine celebration to join together this prince and this young woman in holy matrimony.
Ray: Oh, no. This can't be right, darling. And how you can still be a frog? Mama Odie, she's… (GASPS)
(He looked at poor Tiana. She was crushed. She ran from the parade, not knowing that the "prince" on the float was really Lawrence. With nowhere else to go, she sadly hopped into the city's old cemetery)
(EXT. OLD CEMETERY — NIGHT. Ray flew through the wrought-iron gates and tried to comfort her)
Ray: I know what we seen with our eyes, but if we just go back that way, we're going to find out your fairy tale come true.
Tiana: Just because you wish for something doesn't make it true.
Ray: It's like Evangeline always said to me...
Tiana: Evangeline is nothing but a star, Ray! A big ball of hot air a million miles from here! Open your eyes now, before you get hurt.
(She hopped away, leaving Ray alone)
(Ray looked at the Evening Star as tears welled up his eyes)
Ray: She just speaking out a broken heart. That's all it is. Come on, Evangeline. We're going to show chere the truth!
(EXT. ANAHEIM — NIGHT. The wedding ceremony was still going on as the royal float approached the Emporium. Dr. Facilier was enjoying the sight from a crowd. He cannot wait for the couple to say, "I do")
Reverend: If any of you objects to the union of this two people, speak now or forever hold your plea.
(INT. CHEST, WEDDING CAKE — NIGHT. But Naveen couldn't wait to stop them! From the big chest where he was imprisoned)
Naveen: Me! Me! I object!
(He used his frog tongue to reach outside through the tiny lock. Very slowly, he stuck his tongue to the floor of the float and began inching himself and the chest closer to Lawrence's back)
(EXT. WEDDING CAKE — NIGHT.)
REVEREND: Do you, Prince Naveen, take Charlotte to be your wedded wife?
(Ray flew to the wedding cake)
Ray: Cap, what you doing, son?
(Lawrence swatted him away until he saw Naveen's tongue sticking out and stepped on it SQUISH!)
Naveen: (GROANS)
REVEREND: …as long as you both shall live?
Lawrence: What? I do! Yes, I'm for it.
Reverend: Do you, Charlotte LaBouff...
(Luckily, Ray spotted the flattened tongue and flew right over to the chest where the frog was imprisoned)
Ray: Is that you, Cap?
NAVEEN: Ray! Get me out of this box!
Ray: I can't hear you! I'm going to get you out this box!
(Ray flexed his muscles and flew toward Naveen. The problem was–could he rescue Naveen in time for the frog to stop the wedding?)
(Ray flew right into the lock on the chest. They twisted and turned while Naveen waited)
Reverend: ...to keep yourself only unto him, as long as you both shall live?
Charlotte: Oh, I do.
(Finally, after great effort, the lock sprang open! Naveen hopped out of the chest)
REVEREND: And so, by the power invested in me by the state of California. I now pronounce you man and...
(The wedding was almost over! Naveen jumped onto Lawrence's neck, grabbed the talisman, and held on tight)
(Lawrence starting jerking around)
Charlotte: Prince Naveen!
(EXT. STREET, ANAHEIM — NIGHT.)
Facilier: (GRUNTS ANGRILY)
(Lawrence stumbled backward and fell into the street below)
(Charlotte was mortified)
Charlotte: Goodness gracious! Are you all right?
Lawrence: I just need a moment to compose myself.
(He gets to his feet. He was clutching the frog behind his back)
CHARLOTTE: Cheese and crackers!
(She saw him duck into the cathedral)
(INT. CATHEDRAL — NIGHT. Naveen tried to free himself from Lawrence's grip)
NAVEEN: Lawrence, why are you doing this?
Lawrence: As payback for all those years of humiliation.
(None of this had escaped the notice of Dr. Facilier. He stepped out of the shadows)
Facilier: Get your royal rump back on that wedding cake and finish this deal!
(Naveen shot his long tongue out and easily ripped the talisman off Lawrence's neck. Lawrence transformed back into himself–a short, squat valet)
Facilier: What's he doing? Stop him!
(Ray enter the Emporium and saw the valet)
LAWRENCE: Give it to me!
(Naveen quickly tossed the talisman to Ray)
Ray: I got it!
(But as the weight of the talisman pulled him down, the firefly moaned)
Ray: It got me, too.
Lawrence: Let go of that!
Facilier: Stay out of sight!
(At the same time, a horde of shadowed demons appeared from the crowd and hurried in Ray's direction)
(EXT. STREET, ANAHEIM — NIGHT. Ray flew right past Louis, who was playing with the riverboat band in the Mardi Gras parade. Everyone still thought he was a person in an alligator suit)
Louis: Ray?
(He could see that Ray was no match for the shadows that were hot on his trail)
Pig Guy: Hey, why did you stop?
(The big gator tucked his trumpet under his arm and left the spotlight behind)
MAN: He's a real gator!
(But Louis was too slow to keep up with his friend. He lumbered far behind the shadows, which were chasing Ray straight toward the cemetery)
(EXT. OLD CEMETERY — NIGHT. Tiana was alone at the cemetery when she turned and saw Ray)
Ray: (O.S.) Chere! Chere!
Tiana: Ray?
(Ray threw the talisman to her)
Ray: This proves what we saw ain't what we thought we saw!
(Tiana grabbed the charm)
Tiana: What is this?
Ray: It's a voodoo hayacall. The Shadow Man, he been using it for the…
(The sinister shadows appeared out of nowhere and surrounded her)
Ray: You can't let Shadow Man get this, no matter what! Now run, girl! Run!
(Tiana raced away with Dr. Facilier's shadow close behind her)
Ray: Don't make me light my butt!
(As the other shadows approached, Ray fended them off by blasting them with his light)
Ray: I'm going to get you! I got a lot more of me! Come here, you! (LAUGHS TRIUMPHANTLY) Who's next?
(Just then, Dr. Facilier came upon the firefly and swatted them. Ray tumbled to the ground, and the evil doctor stepped on him. The firefly was in bad shape when Louis found them)
Louis: Ray!
(Until he saw Ray lying still in the ground)
Louis: Ray?
(Tiana was still flying, but when Dr. Facilier caught up with her, she stopped and faced him and the deadly shadows)
Tiana: Back off, or I'll break this thing into a million pieces!
(Dr. Facilier waved his hand and blew a light powder toward her)
(Something was changing. Suddenly, Tiana felt like a princess. She was in the restaurant of her dreams, surrounded by elegance)
(INT. TIANA'S RESTAURANT – IMAGINATION. Her food had brought people together to share and enjoy good rimes, just as Tiana's father, James had said it would. She was a success!)
(The crowd in the restaurant parted, and Tiana saw Dr. Facilier)
Facilier: Now, isn't this a whole lot better than hopping around the bayou for the rest of your life?
Tiana: Shadow Man.
Facilier: (CHUCKLES) Got to hand it to you, Tiana. When you dream, you dream big. Just look at this place. Going to be the crown jewel of the Crescent City! And all you got to do to make this a reality is hand over that little old talisman of mine.
Tiana: No. This is not right.
Facilier: Come on now, darling. Think of everything you've sacrificed.
(The visions of Georgia and Violet at Red Rocket's Pizza Pot, appeared in the pink smoke)
Georgia: Girl, all you ever do is work.
Violet: I told y'all she wouldn't come.
Facilier: Think of all those naysayers who doubted you.
(The visions appeared again with Buford and Statler & Waldorf)
Buford: You're never going to get enough for the down payment.
Statler: ...little woman of your background, you're better off where you're at.
Facilier: And don't forget your poor daddy.
(Using the curtains to reveal the screen of James and Tiana as a child on stage)
Facilier: Now, that was one hard working man.
MAN: See you in the morning, James.
FACILIER: Double, sometimes triple shifts.
(James got home, tired and flexing his bones)
Facilier: Never letting on how bone tired, beat down he really was.
TIANA: Daddy!
James: Hey, baby cakes!
FACILIER: Shame on that hard work, didn't amount much more than a busted up, old gumbo pot. And a dream that never get off the back porch. But you? You can give your poor daddy everything he ever wanted. Come on, Tiana. You're almost there.
(Tiana tries to put the talisman into Dr. Facilier's hand, steady)
Tiana: My daddy never did get what he wanted.
(She finally knew exactly what to do)
Tiana: But he had what he needed. He had love. He never lost sight of what was really important.
Facilier: Easy with that. Careful.
Tiana: And neither will I!
(Tiana raised the talisman and threw it to the ground. But before it reaches the ground, the shadow caught it and gives it to Dr. Facilier. Instantly, everything changed)
(EXT. OLD CEMETERY — NIGHT. She felt herself becoming a frog back in cemetery again)
Facilier: Y'all should have taken my deal.
(He pins Tiana to the ground with his cane)
Facilier: Now you're going to spend the rest of your life being a slimy, little frog.
(But Tiana knew it! She smirked at Dr. Facilier)
Tiana: I've got news for you, Shadow Man. It's not slime. It's mucus!
(She shot her frog tongue out and snatches the talisman from Dr. Facilier's hand and she had a chance to smash it)
Facilier: No! No!
(He looked at the broken talisman)
Facilier: How am I ever going to pay back my debt?
(Just then, the voodoo masks appeared)
Facilier: Friends!
Masks: (SINGING) Are you ready?
Facilier: No! I'm not ready at all! In fact, I got lots more plans.
Masks: Are you ready?
Facilier: This is just a minor setback in a major operation. (SCREAMS)
(Monster hands crumble from the ground. It was the voodoo dolls)
Facilier: As soon as I whip up another spell, we'll be back in business! I still got that froggy prince locked away! I just need a little more time.
(A giant voodoo mask appeared in front of Dr. Facilier)
Facilier: No, please! (EXCLAIMING)
(The shadows begins dragging Dr. Facilier to the mask's mouth)
Facilier: Just a little more time!
(They were ready to command the shadows to take the doctor away)
Facilier: I promise I'll pay y'all back! I promise!
(In an instant, he went into the mask's mouth and vanished forever. KABOOM! It left the grave in the floor that says: DR. FACILIER, THE SHADOW MAN)
(Tiana took a deep breath and she ran down to the parade as fast as she could. She had to find Naveen)
(EXT. CATHEDRAL — NIGHT. Outside the church, Charlotte got mad, knocking madly on the door to the cathedral)
Charlotte: Prince! Prince Naveen! Your shy and retiring bride-to-be is getting antsy! (GRUNTS)
(She slammed the doors open)
(INT. CATHEDRAL — NIGHT.)
Lawrence: (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Hello, darling.
(Charlotte saw that he wasn't the real Naveen. He was a fat man!)
(BOTH SCREAMING)
(Lawrence rushed away from Charlotte)
Naveen: Miss LaBouff! Please, down here! Allow me to introduce myself. I am the real Prince Naveen!
(The book slammed down on top of the frog)
Naveen: (WEAKLY) Of Maldonia.
Charlotte: (GASPS) Did you say "Prince"?
(EXT. CATHEDRAL — NIGHT. Tiana flew over just in time to watch Lawrence being dragged away by police officers)
Big Daddy: Boys, drag this maggot down to the parish prison.
(The police officers put Lawrence in the van)
Lawrence: I'm completely innocent! Now, the Shadow Man bamboozled me!
(The officer slams the door on him)
Charlotte: Goodness gracious. This is so much to absorb. Let me see if I got this right. If I kiss you before midnight, you and Tiana will turn human again? And then we're gonna get ourselves married and live happily ever after, the end!
Naveen: Yeah, more or less. But remember, you must give Tiana all the money she requires for her restaurant. Because Tiana, she is my Evangeline.
(Tiana's eyes filled with tears. Naveen really loved her)
CHARLOTTE: Anything you want, sugar. Pucker up, buttercup.
(Naveen was about to kiss until her voice cried out)
TIANA: Wait!
Naveen: Tiana?
Charlotte: Tiana?
Tiana: Don't do this.
Naveen: I have to do this. And we're running out of time.
Tiana: I won't let you!
Naveen: It's the only way to get to your dream!
(Tiana watched as Naveen turned back toward Charlotte to kiss her)
Tiana: My dream? My dream wouldn't be complete without you in it.
(Naveen turned and looked at Tiana. It was getting closer and closer to midnight!)
Tiana: I love you, Naveen.
Naveen: Warts and all?
Tiana: Warts and all.
(Naveen took Tiana in his arms)
(Charlotte burst into tears of joy)
Charlotte: (SNIFFLES) All my life, I read about true love in fairy tales and, Tia, you found it!
(She took out a lacy hanky, dabbed her eyes, and turned to Prince Naveen)
Charlotte: I'll kiss him. For you, honey. No marriage required.
(Tiana and Naveen looked at Charlotte gratefully. She held the frog to her lips just as the clock chimed twelve)
Charlotte: Oh my word! Maybe that old clock's a little fast!
(Then she kissed him. Nothing happened. She kissed him again, but Naveen was still a frog)
Charlotte: I'm so sorry.
(Naveen and Tiana stared at each other and joined hands. Naveen don't love being a frog, but he loved Tiana)
LOUIS: Tiana! Naveen!
(Louis came running toward them with a sorrowful look on his face)
NAVEEN: Louis, what is it?
Louis: Shadow Man had laid poor Ray low.
Tiana: Ray.
Louis: He's hurting awful bad.
(He revealed Ray. He was lying there, his light barely glowing)
(Ray opened his eyes. They brightened when he saw Tiana)
Ray: Hey, chere, how come you're still...
Tiana: We're staying frogs, Ray.
Naveen: And we're staying together.
(Ray smiled)
Ray: Oh! (SPEAKS FRENCH) I like that very much.
(Then the little firefly looked up)
Ray: Evangeline likes that, too.
(And with that, his light slowly dimmed)
(Tiana, Naveen, and Louis bowed their heads as the rain began to fall. Their tears mixed with the downpour as Ray's light went out)
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – NIGHT. It was deep into the night by the time Tink pulled her wagon up to the edge of Springtime Square. Queen Clarion and Fairy Mary came flying to the square, followed by the Minister of the Seasons)
(All the fairies of Anaheim were gathered. Many were still trying to clean up the square. Others were waiting to hear what the council had decided)
Clarion: Attention, everyone!
(The fairies fell silent)
Clarion: I'm afraid I have distressing news. There is no way spring can come on time.
(The fairies groaned, but Clarion continued)
Clarion: Months of work was lost, and it will take us months to restore it all. So when the Everblossom opens tomorrow,
(The crowd looked up at the huge flower, poised to announce the arrival of spring)
Clarion: I'm afraid we will not be going to the mainland for spring.
(Stunned silence)
(Tinker Bell soared out of the wagon and landed lightly in front of Clarion and Fairy Mary. In her hands was her new and improved berry-paint sprayer, with a mainland-style crank)
Tinker Bell: Wait! I know how we can fix everything!
(Vidia, standing among the assembled fairies, made a loud scoffing sound)
Vidia: Tinker Bell?
(A few fairies laughed; some murmured angrily)
(But not all of them)
(Not her friends)
(And not the tinkers)
Clarion: Tinker Bell, I don't think this is…
Tinker Bell: Just hear me out. Please.
(She held up her first invention)
(Tinker a Bell turned to a painting fairy who stood next to an all-red ladybug)
Tinker Bell: You! How long does it take you to paint a ladybug?
Painting Fairy: I don't know. 10, 15 minutes, I guess.
(Tink aimed the berry-paint sprayer at the ladybug and fired)
(To her utter amazement, the sprayer instantly painted a perfect pattern of black dots on the ladybug's back)
(The painting fairy smiled, pleasantly surprised, as did the bug. The crowd murmured again, but this time it was with interest, not anger)
(Tink reached into her tunic and pulled out a leaf scroll covered with with designs)
Tinker Bell: See? We can build more. I can show you how. Making paint, gathering seeds, we can do it all in no time. We have to at least try!
(The fairies peered at the designs and whispered. Hope began to lift the spirits)
(Vidia made an impatient noise and turned to the crowd of fairies)
Vidia: Wait a… Are we really gonna listen to her? She's the reason we're in this mess in the first place!
Tinker Bell: But I can fix it.
(Vidia snorted)
Vidia: Yippee! Tinker Bell's going to save us with her dopey little doohickeys.
(Tink felt anger rising in her chest)
VIDIA: Hide the squirrels!
Tinker Bell: What is your problem, Vidia? Why do you think you're so much better than me?
Vidia: I am better than you, sweetie. I didn't ruin spring.
Tinker Bell: At least now I'm trying to help. Have you ever helped anyone besides yourself?
(Vidia's eyes narrowed)
Vidia: Well, I tried to help you! Maybe I should have told you to capture the hawk instead of the thistles!
(As soon as the words were out of her mouth, Vidia realized her mistake)
(There was a loud gasp from the crowd as they grasped the meaning of what Vidia had just said. Chasing the Thistles had been Vidia's idea. She had put Tink up to it, knowing that Tink was too new, and too inexperienced, to understand the danger)
(Vidia's face turned pale. She shut her mouth with a snap and shot a nervous glance toward Clarion)
(There was a hushed silence)
(Clarion gave Vidia a stern and knowing look)
Clarion: Perhaps Tinker Bell was not the only one responsible.
Vidia: (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)
Clarion: It seems to me that your fast-flying talent is well-suited to chasing down each and every one of the thistles.
(Vidia's tightly closed mouth fell open)
Vidia: Me?
Clarion: Yes. And I expect them all to be returned to Needlepoint Meadow as soon as possible.
Vidia: But that could take forever!
Clarion: Then I suggest you get started.
(Tinker Bell watched Vidia fly away angrily)
(But Tink didn't enjoy seeing Vidia humiliated. She couldn't. No matter what Vidia had or hadn't done, it was Tink who had set the disaster in motion, and it was Tink who needed to put things right)
(Clarion turned to her)
Clarion: Now, Tinker Bell, are you sure you can do this?
(Tink directed her words to Clarion, but she was really speaking to Clank and Bobble, her friends whose feelings she had hurt so badly)
Tinker Bell: Yes. Because I'm a tinker. It's who I am. And tinkers fix things.
(Clank and Bobble exchanged a happy look)
Tinker Bell: But I can't do it alone.
BOTH: Command us, Miss Bell.
(They flew to her side and saluted)
(Silvermist, Iridessa, Fawn, and Rosetta also rose out of the crowd and joined Clank and Bobble)
Silvermist: I'll help.
Fawn: Show us how, Tink!
(Rosetta's voice was sweet again)
Rosetta: I'll help you.
(Even Iridessa glowed with excitement)
Iridessa: Me, too!
(Tinker Bell grinned from ear to ear, but one look at Fairy Mary's face reminded her that there was work to be done)
Tinker Bell: Okay, gather up all the twigs you can, all different sizes, and tree sap. We need lots of that. But most importantly,
(She tried hard to avoid Fairy Mary's eyes. She knew she was right about this)
Tinker Bell: we need to find lost things.
(INT. MONSTARS' LOCKER ROOM — DAY. The MonStars broke the door to their locker room down, and ran inside. They were filled with glee and excitement for their victory, and were giving each other high-fives. Bang pulled Pound into a headlock, and gave him a victory noogie. Their celebration was cut short when someone entered the room, and the looks on their faces showed pure fear)
Bupkus: It's the boss.
(Mr. Swackhammer was in the room, lighting up a cigar)
(The MonStars all pulled fake enthusiastic smiles and greeted)
MonStars (All): Hello, Mr. Swackhammer.
(Swackhammer walked over to the boys and gave them a pep talk)
Swackhammer: All right. Not bad for the first half, but we gotta keep this up.
Pound: Hey, no problem. We stole...
(Nawt interrupted him and started talking fast)
Nawt: We stole talent from the best players in the NBA.
(Tulip found her way in the locker room by climbing through the vents and hid in one of the lockers)
Tulip: From the NBA.
Nawt: (babbling rapidly) There was Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Shawn Bradley, Muggsy Bogues, and uh-uh-'Grandmama' ... oh, yeah. Larry Johnson.
(Swackhammer brushed Nawt away roughly)
Swackhammer: Shut up.
(Suddenly, something began to catch his attention, and he sniffed the air)
Swackhammer: I smell something.
(Blanko sniffed his underarm, and thought the odor was from him and his buddies)
Blanko: Uh, we have been playing really hard.
(The other MonStars agreed)
Swackhammer: Not you, you idiot.
(Swackhammer suddenly realized where it was coming from, noticing the smell of perfume and pixie dust, and looked at one of the lockers)
Swackhammer: It's coming from over here.
(Tulip tried not to make a sound, and saw Blanko leaned over to where they were at and he found her locker)
POUND: That locker.
(Blanko sniffed, and ripped the hinges off of the locker door. The MonStars came closer, and found Tulip)
Bang: Look. It's the beautiful teenager.
(Swackhammer came towards Tulip)
Swackhammer: Ah. It smells like a spy.
(Tulip covered her eyes as they began to prepare for the worst)
Tulip: You guys need a publicist? I can make you big. Ha, ha.
(INT. MUPPETS' LOCKER ROOM — DAY. While Tulip was dealing with the MonStars and Swackhammer, Walter is giving the Muppet Squad (Janice, Link, Beaker, Gonzo, Zoot, Fozzie, Crazy Harry) a pep talk to give them some confidence to try hard)
Walter: I know we're down.
FOZZIE: Yeah. Let's hear the story.
Walter: But I've been in this situation many times before. We can still win this thing. It's not over with. We gotta come together. We gotta believe in ourselves. We can win this game.
FOZZIE: Yeah, right. That's gonna help us.
(However, by the look on the Muppet Squad's (Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Scooter, Floyd, Animal, Walter, Bunsen, Janice, Link, Beaker, Gonzo, Zoot, Crazy Harry) faces, they felt that there would be no way that they could beat the MonStars, until the door opened, and saw Tulip, burnt by the MonStars and covered in soot)
Gonzo: (elbows Beaker and pokes Zoot) Looks like Tulip just had a close encounter with a bug-zapper.
Tulip: MonStars. The MonStars.
(She tried to say, but she is shaking and looked pretty scared)
(Tulip nearly fell, but Piggy, Kermit, and Crazy Harry caught Tulip respectively, and sat her down on the bench)
FOZZIE: Ooh. That's gotta hurt.
Walter: You all right, Tulip?
Tulip: The MonSt... The MonStars stole the talent from the NBA players.
(All of the Muppet Squad (Pepé, Rowlf, Animal, Bunsen, Janice, Link, Beaker, Gonzo) gasped, and sighed with disappointment)
Walter: So that's what happened to those guys.
Scooter: I think we should qui... Forfeit.
Muppets (All): Yeah.
(Walter turned to Scooter)
Walter: I didn't get dragged down here just to get my butt whipped by a bunch of ugly MonStars. (while Scooter faints) I ain't going out like that. We're letting them push us around. We gotta fight them back. We gotta take it to them. We gotta get right in their faces. What do you say? Are you with me or not?
(The Muppet Squad (Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Lew Zealand, Scooter, Floyd, Animal, Pepé, Janice, Bunsen, Beaker, Link, Gonzo, Zoot, Crazy Harry) were all falling asleep and snored loudly. Kermit, Piggy, and Tulip were the only ones that actually listened. He turned his attention to Kermit, who brought a water bottle over to them)
Kermit: Finished? Great speech and all, Walt. You had them riveted. But, uh, didn't you forget something?
(Walter raised an eyebrow)
Walter: What?
(Kermit showed him a water bottle that was labeled "WALTER'S SECRET STUFF")
Kermit: Your secret stuff.
(He guzzled the water bottle and he grew a lot of muscles. This caught the Muppets' (Crazy Harry, Lew Zealand, Rowlf, Dr. Teeth, Scooter, Pepé, Floyd, Animal, Beaker) attention when they woke up, while he was flexing his muscles. He could regain the Muppet Squad's (Piggy, Lew Zealand, Rowlf, Scooter, Dr. Teeth, Gonzo) confidence)
Piggy: Wow.
Gonzo: Whoa, nice deltoids.
(Kermit went back to his normal shape as he winked at Walter)
Kermit: Play along.
(Walter took the bottle and examined it with a raised eyebrow as Kermit tried to tug the bottle from him)
Kermit: Uh, stop hogging it, Walt. We're your teammates.
(The bottle flew out of Walter's hands as it landed near Scooter, who took a sip, and began to feel powerful and more confident)
Dr. Teeth: Secret stuff?
(He took a sip. The Muppet Squad started drinking the "Secret Stuff" and started to feel more confident and stronger)
FOZZIE: Secret stuff?
Rowlf: You wouldn't hold out on us, would you?
(Zoot takes a swig)
Walter: No, I mean, I didn't think you guys really needed it. I mean, you're so tough. You're competitive.
(Lew Zealand got in between Rowlf, Pepé, Rizzo, and Beaker, who were fighting over the bottle)
Lew Zealand: We're also fish-out-of-water, son. We need it bad.
Rowlf: Hey.
(Lew Zealand took a guzzle and tossed it to Tulip, who nearly caught it, but Gonzo had it in his hand)
Tulip: Uh, I'd like some of that.
PIGGY: Could I have a sip, please?
Gonzo: You know, this goes against everything they taught me in health class.
(Walter rolled his eyes)
Walter: Do you want to win or not?
Gonzo: Bottoms up.
(He guzzled it down from the bottle until there was nothing left inside, and tossed it to Tulip)
Gonzo: Yummy.
(Walter gathered the team (Lew Zealand, Scooter, Janice, Kermit, Piggy, Beaker, Fozzie, Gonzo) in a huddle, placed her hand out)
Walter: All right. How about we go out and kick some alien butt, huh? Let's go.
(They (Beaker, Gonzo, Fozzie, Walter, Kermit, Piggy, Zoot, Janice, Scooter, Floyd, Animal, Lew Zealand, Bunsen) placed their hands on top of his)
Walter: How about it? Ready?
MUPPETS: Yeah!
(They shook it with a cheer, and headed out for the next half. Tulip squeezed the bottle for a drink, but it was empty)
(INT. JIM HENSON MEMORIAL GARDENS — DAY. "Get Ready 4 This" by 2 Unlimited plays as the Muppet Squad (Walter, Kermit, Scooter, Piggy, Fozzie, Gonzo, Lew Zealand, Pepé, Beaker) ran onto the court with determination and courage, facing the MonStars with their game faces)
(Bang and Gonzo were face-to-face, growling at each, while Animal did the same with Nawt, Scooter to Bupkus, and Walter to Pound. Kermit just gave an Aside Glance to the audience and looked pretty confident herself)
(Bang passed the ball to Pound and he made his way to the hoop. Before he could shoot, Kermit rode in on a mechanical scooter and stole the ball from him)
KERMIT: Coming through.
(Pound was surprised that Kermit stole the ball, and started to go after her. Walter ran over to where Kermit was, with Nawt trying to guard him)
Walter: Kermit.
(Kermit stopped the scooter and tossed the ball over her shoulder)
Kermit: Special delivery.
(Walter caught the ball and dunked it with the crowd (Lew Zealand, Rowlf, Pepé, Sam) going wild)
(Swackhammer, however, was angry by that play)
Swackhammer: What? No! Boo!
(The Muppet Squad were getting closer to beating the MonStars as the game continued. Maybe they could avoid slavery on Moron Mountain after all!)
(Bupkus got the ball, lept in the air, and was about to dunk. His expression showed determination, but changed to shock as he saw the hoop covered with explosives and TNT. He stopped in mid-air as he saw the hoop blowing up while Kermit and Beaker stood there, watching Bupkus get his just desserts)
Kermit: Uh, nice kaboom, Beaker.
Beaker: (SPEAKING GIBBERISH)
(Their little victory came short when Bupkus grabbed him, glaring at the genius until his teeth got shot, leaving his two front teeth available. He saw Floyd and Dr. Teeth, dressed in black suits, shades, and holding guns, almost looking like the Men in Black, and finding their inner Pulp Fiction. They looked at each other, and shot Bupkus' teeth again, leaving him toothless. However, his teeth came back in, and he was ready to fight)
(Walter was dribbling across the court, with Bang and Nawt on his tail. He shot the ball into the air and Nawt tried to knock it away, but the ball made its way into the basket)
(Blanko passed the ball to Pound)
Pound: Let's teach them a lesson.
(Blanko watched Rowlf carrying a fishing rod, and flung the hook onto Pound's shorts. He gave it a yank, Pound's shorts came off and his big behind was showing!)
(Pound looked down, saw that his shorts were missing and covered it with his jersey, giving an embarrassed smile)
Piggy: Nice butt.
(Everyone in the stadium was laughing real hard after Piggy said that, even Walter)
(The game continued on, and the MonStars were continuing to get beat. Kermit passed the ball to Animal, who dunked the ball with ease, Walter went past Pound, who got his shorts back, and Bupkus, and dunked the ball with ease. Bupkus tried to stop the ball, but failed)
(For the next play, Lew Zealand and Rowlf got Scooter on top of their shoulders)
SCOOTER: Going up.
(Pound was about to stop them)
POUND: You're mine, fool.
(Scooter dunked the ball into the hoop, and it hit Pound's head. The Muppet Squad were still earning more points, and the MonStars were still leading)
(Tulip, Beauregard, and Sam were cheering on the bench, when Tulip accidentally high-fived Sam off the bench)
(The MonStars had the ball now, and they made their way to the hoop, until Janice came with Walter, Kermit, Pepé, Lew Zealand)
Janice: Hello. Like, a little surprise for you, my friends.
(It made the MonStars pass out as Janice got the ball into the basket)
Janice: Two points.
(Walter and Nawt leapt into the air as Walter dunked the ball into the hoop, and hit Nawt on top of his head. On the next play, Kermit passed the ball to Walter, who shot the ball easily into the hoop as Bang tripped over his feet, and landed on the floor. Swackhammer's eyes turned red, growled furiously, and was going beyond his boiling point)
Swackhammer: Dang!
(Gonzo took out a bucket of red paint and a paint brush)
Gonzo: Ooh. This will be good.
(He painted Pound's behind red. After he did that, the audience laughed, but the BULL saw the red paint that looks like a torero's red cape used for bullfights in Spain. He became raving mad)
(Lew Zealand and Scooter moved out of the rampaging bull's way and he rammed his horns into Pound's behind, making the alien scream in pain, and fly up into the stadium ceiling!)
Crowd: Olé!
(Pepé running around the court as the MonStars surrounded him)
Bang: Okay, shrimp.
Pepé: Uh-oh.
(Pepé turned around and saw the MonStars snarling at him. He had enough of being bullied around and snapped, he did karate yells, and caught the MonStars by surprise. He rabbit-punched Pound, head-butted Bupkus, punched Bang in the stomach, punched Blanko in the face, causing his neck to spiral. He then bit Pound's ear, pulled Bupkus' hair with his mouth, and kicked Bang on the chin, causing the green player to fall backwards. After the MonStars got beaten up by Pepé, Dr. Teeth jumped up into the air like Michael Jordan, and dunked the ball into the hoop)
(Nawt groaned in defeat, while Walter cheered and Lew Zealand and Rowlf high-fived, cheered and celebrated)
Walter: Yes!
Swackhammer: Time out!
(The scoreboard showed that the Muppet Squad were getting closer to winning and beating the MonStars, but they were two points behind the MonStars, it was a good sign. The current score... Muppet Squad: 66, MonStars: 68. Swackhammer stomped his way over to the court, and Masterson blew his whistle, telling him that he could not interfere, but he flung him away)
Swackhammer: Shut up, you little rodent. Get away from me. Powwow.
(The Muppet Squad (Lew Zealand, Gonzo, Kermit, Scooter, Walter) were excited about winning the game so far. They took a time-out for the fourth quarter)
Walter: All right. We're right back at this game. Come on, now. Let's play some tough defense.
(Things were going great for the Muppet Squad, but Swackhammer was busy berating the MonStars. Swackhammer pointed at Walter)
Swackhammer: Why didn't you get this guy?
BUPKUS: He's a baseball player.
Nawt: Yeah, boss, a baseball player.
Swackhammer: Looks like a basketball player to me.
Blanko: Yeah, me too.
Swackhammer: He's the one I want for Moron Mountain.
(Walter and Kermit walked to the center of the court)
Walter: Hey, you.
(Swackhammer turned to face Walter)
Swackhammer: Are you talking to me?
Walter: Yeah, I'm talking to you. You want a piece of me? Come and get it.
(Swackhammer looked at the MonStars with a twisted smile, which they had, except for Blanko and Nawt. By their facial expressions, they were pretty much annoyed about this)
BUPKUS: Uh-oh.
(Swackhammer walked towards him)
Swackhammer: What did you have in mind?
Walter: How about we raise the stakes a little bit?
(Swackhammer inhaled his cigar and smoke came out)
Swackhammer: Interesting.
Walter: If we win, you give the NBA players their talent back.
Swackhammer: But what if we win?
(Walter thought about the bargain, then he made a risky decision that would cause him to lose him families and friends)
Walter: If you win?
Swackhammer: Uh-huh.
Walter: You get me.
Pound: Good deal, boss.
Kermit: Walt, you think that's a good ide–
(Walter gently covered his mouth to stop him from talking. Swackhammer inhaled his cigar)
SWACKHAMMER: You'll be our star attraction. You'll sign autographs all day long. And play one-on-one with the paying customers. And you'll always lose.
(THE FUTURE: Walter had his mental picture of himself in Moron Mountain, signing autographs for the tiny aliens and himself in chains trying to play basketball. A customer was climbing up the steps and shot the ball into the hoop, cheering as he blew razzberries in his face)
(THE PRESENT: Swackhammer looked at him with an evil smile)
Swackhammer: Do we have a deal?
(Walter extended his hand, and replied in a dark tone)
Walter: Deal.
(Swackhammer took his hand and squeezed it really hard, nearly crushing it)
NAWT: All right.
(He showed no pain and let go as he turned their attention to the team)
(Kermit caught up with him)
Kermit: I don't think you should've done that, doc.
Walter: I have faith in my team.
(Swackhammer looked back and his face hardened. He would have his team win, even if they have to beat the Muppets half to death)
Swackhammer: (to the MonStars) Crush 'em.
(Masterson blew the whistle to start the fourth quarter. Beaker got the ball and was making his way to the hoop, but Nawt, Pound, and Bang stampeded)
POUND: Feeding time, boys.
(Beaker's eyes bugged out as the MonStars trampled over him, causing his entire body to fall apart in pieces. He then held up a sign with his dismembered hand that read, "Ouch!")
(Scooter tried to get out of the way, but Bupkus and Bang butt-slammed into him, squashing the poor gofer. Rowlf was dribbling the ball with ease, but Pound crushed him with his foot)
POUND: Goodbye.
(Walter got the ball away and made his way over to the basket. Bupkus was behind him and Pound was in front of him. Pound swung his arm and backhanded Walter across his face, causing his to fall and lose the ball)
(As Dr. Teeth was dribbling the ball to the hoop, Bupkus used his elbow and pinned Dr. Teeth down to the ground, causing his body to squeak like a chew toy. Then Bang punched Lew Zealand in the face, while Nawt kicked Animal in the stomach)
(After that, Bupkus used Lew Zealand as a golf club and Pepé as a golf ball. He swung Lew Zealand and smacked the poor shrimp away to the Muppet Squad's bleachers. The purple MonStar then made his way over to Gonzo, squashed him with his hand, and looked at his palm. He noticed that Gonzo was stuck to him like gum, and Gonzo came to)
Gonzo: But, mommy, I don't want to go to school today.
(As Pound caught the ball and roughly shoved Walter to the ground with a mean glare, Gonzo was clinging onto Bupkus' face)
Gonzo: I want to stay home and bake cookies with you.
(Bupkus was annoyed with Gonzo's hallucination and tried to pry the stuntman off of his head. However, Gonzo clung to his head and skin, nearly ripping it off! Luckily, he did let go of him, but Bupkus' face became misshaped and mixed up. Pound got onto the hoop, and saw Piggy standing there)
PIGGY: I'm open, I'm open.
(Pound jumped off the hoop)
Kermit: Piggy, Piggy, heads up.
(Piggy turned around, saw Pound falling fast; he was about to crush her!)
PIGGY: Oh!
POUND: Belly flop.
(Before she could say anything else, Piggy was shoved by Kermit. Pound instead landed on top of Kermit, and crushed him. Piggy rolled to the floor, and looked up, seeing that Kermit's arms were straining)
PIGGY: Oh, my. Kermit!
(The audience and the Muppet Squad all gasped and screamed in alarm)
Piggy: Kermit!
(She ran over to where Pound was, as he got up)
Pound: Is this your man?
(He left with an evil chuckle, and Kermit popped back to his normal shape. Piggy rushed over to him, and cradled his upper body)
Piggy: Are you okay?
Kermit: Me? Oh, yeah. I'm fine. Are you okay.
Piggy: Oh, Kermie. Thank you.
Kermit: Aw, it was nothing.
Piggy: That was the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me.
(She brought her face to Kermit's receptively, and kissed him on his lips)
(After kissing him, she left, and Kermit has a lovesick look on his face, and had hearts in his eyes)
Walter: Time out.
(He checked on the other Muppet Squad players)
(The Muppet Squad were all a mess; they had injuries that looked gruesome due to the MonStars' brutality: Beaker was in a body cast, Floyd was burnt by Bang, Rowlf was in a body cast, Link became a smoked bacon/ham breakfast, Dr. Teeth was in a body cast, Lew Zealand somehow became a chicken dinner, Sam was hit on the head while he sits on his wheelchair, Beauregard tried to revive Animal, which he woke up, and had a sign saying, "Eat at Joe's", and possibly the most-gruesome and most-saddening, Pepé has to get his iron lung to keep them alive while Sweetums is laying belly-first on the iron lung machine)
(Walter paced back and forth, thinking. There was only Kermit, Walter, Fozzie, and Piggy. He walked to the team bench to find a fifth player)
Walter: Okay. We need a fifth player.
(Gonzo got up as he was sitting next to Janice and Bunsen)
Gonzo: Hey, coach, listen. You got any more of that secret stuff? I think it's starting to wear off.
(His arms deflated as he made a muscle)
Walter: It didn't wear off. It was just water. You guys had the special stuff inside of you all along.
(Gonzo just looked at him, and shrugged)
Gonzo: Yeah, yeah, I knew that. But listen, you got any more?
PIGGY: I'll take some.
SCOOTER: Yeah, can I have some, too?
(The other Muppets asked for more of the Secret Stuff, but Walter instead turned her attention to Tulip)
Walter: Tulip?
Tulip: Me?
Walter: You're in at center. Just guard the big guy, okay?
Tulip: Guard him? Guard him? I'll smother him. I'll be all over him like a cheap suit. I'll be on him like stink on rice. I tell you, he's going down.
(The game continued, Masterson tossed the ball to Fozzie, who passed it to Walter. He fly toward the hoop, but the MonStars surrounded him)
(They tried to steal the ball from him, but all of their attempts were unsuccessful. Walter saw Tulip wide open)
Tulip: Walt, over here. Over here. Over here. I'm open.
(Walter passed it to Tulip)
(When Tulip caught the ball, Bang jumped up, and crushed her! Bupkus, Blanko, and Pound dog-piled, the ball popped out from under them, and landed into the basket, scoring the Muppets three points!)
Walter: Yes!
(Everyone in the stadium cheered, even one of the little Nerdlucks who was with Swackhammer, to which he just smacked him down)
(Suddenly, they all shrank back as they saw the MonStars getting up)
BANG: Big man pancake.
(After they got up, Tulip was revealed to still be in one piece, but she was flattened like a pancake!)
All: Ooh!
(Like the other teammates, Tulip is down to Kermit, Walter, Fozzie, and Piggy. Two rats, YOLANDA and CHESTER, who were both medics, entered the gym with a stretcher and decided to get Tulip back to her regular shape. Yolanda stuffed a hose into Tulip's mouth. They used his hose to pump some air into her. After she was bloated and inflated up to a balloon, Chester then pulled the hose, and Tulip deflated, and floated around the gym)
Piggy: Pixie dust.
(The little aliens, who were watching with Swackhammer, gazed at the beautiful sight of pixie dust)
Janice: Oh, wow.
(After a minute or two of flying, Tulip falls on the stretcher, while Yolanda and Chester carried her away and left the gym. Walter couldn't believe her eyes)
Walter: How'd he do that?
Kermit: Aw, anybody can do that, doc. Even you. Watch this.
(Kermit then pulled Fozzie's neck, and stretched him out really far)
Fozzie: (In strangled voice) No sweat. This is Muppet Land.
(His neck went back to normal as Walter looked at the scoreboard as well as the time. He needed to score two more points and they had ten seconds left)
Walter: Ten seconds to go? Thanks for telling me, frog.
(Masterson walked over towards Walter)
Masterson: I hate to be the bearer of bad news, your Airness, but if you don't find a fifth player, your team will forfeit the game.
Walter: Forfeit?
Masterson: Precisely, Sir Altitude.
Walter: No way. We'll find someone.
(Before anyone could say anything, someone shouted a fanfare. Everyone turned their attention, and there stood Orchid! Walter was acting calm and cool as everyone erupted with loud cheers, whistles, and whoops. Swackhammer stood up from his seat)
Swackhammer: Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't know Katy Perry was in this picture.
(Orchid was in the Muppet Squad uniform)
Orchid: Hey. Perhaps I could be of some assistance.
(She ran over to the court, and Walter pointed out)
Walter: That's our fifth player. Thanks, Orchid. Now you get to live your dream. Let's go.
(They greeted each other, and got into the huddle)
Walter: All right. All right. We need to score two points...
Orchid: Here's how I see it. Comedian bear.
Fozzie: Yes.
Orchid: Kick it to the girl pig down in the post.
PIGGY: Yeah?
Orchid: You dish it back to the guy frog.
Piggy: Got it.
Orchid: You swing it to Walt. You go to the hole.
Walter: Orchid.
Orchid: And dominate.
Walter: We're on defense.
(The Muppet Squad and Walter realized the situation)
Orchid: Whoa. I don't play defense.
Walter: Typical.
Orchid: Gonna have to listen to Walt on this.
Walter: Okay. Somebody steal the ball, get it to me and I'll score before the time runs out.
Orchid: Don't lose that confidence. Okay. Paws and wings in here. Okay.
(They placed their hands on top of his, gave it a shake, and got to their positions to play the last 10 seconds of the game, and win this for the Muppets)
(Then we walked over to the center of the court)
(The current score... Muppet Squad: 76, MonStars: 77)
(As everyone got to their positions to start the last 10 seconds of the game, Orchid walked to the center of the court)
Orchid: This is why I was born. I thrive on pressure.
(Fozzie walked up to Orchid, and tugged on her dress)
Fozzie: Excuse me, uh, sorry.
Orchid: Yo, yo, easy on the dress, Fozzie. Easy.
Fozzie: Pardon me. Mrs. Orchid, something's really been bugging me.
Orchid: Yeah?
Fozzie: Just how did you get here anyway?
Orchid: Producer's a friend of mine. Just had a teamster come and drop me off.
Fozzie: Uh-huh. Well, that's how it goes.
Orchid: Hey, you see this, uh, kind of chunky fellow over here?
(She pointed to Pound, who was looking at Piggy with a smirk)
Fozzie: Uh-huh.
(Orchid began to whisper his plans into the comedian bear's ear, and it looked like Fozzie loved the sound of the idea)
Fozzie: Oh. Oh, that's good. Oh, yes.
Orchid: Let's do it. You the comedian bear.
(She got ready to play)
Masterson: Now, let's all play fair. Here.
(Bupkus strutted to the court, got the ball from Masterson, and elbowed the tiny rat)
Orchid: Yo, space man. Don't choke now. Come on.
(Fozzie got a football helmet on his head and got into a cannon)
Fozzie: It's gut-check time.
(Bupkus passed the ball to Pound, Camilla lit the cannon, and Fozzie flew out, charging at Pound as he flew into his stomach, and head butted him in the gut. The force knocked the wind out of the leader, and made him knock off of his feet and drop the ball)
ORCHID: This must be mine. Woo-hoo!
(Orchid picked it up, and began to dribble)
Orchid: This belongs to me.
(Fozzie got out of Pound's stomach, and ran around the court to distract Bupkus. Orchid threw the ball to Walter)
Orchid: I'm going this way. I'm going left. Whoa! Don't ever trust an Earthling.
(Pound ran after Orchid, while Nawt guarded Walter)
PIGGY: Walt!
(Walter passed the ball to Piggy, and Blanko and Bang surrounded her)
BANG: Get the frog. Get the girl.
(They were about to steal the ball from her, but Fozzie came onto the court with his arms out)
Fozzie: Come on, come on. I'm open. I'm op...
(Piggy passed the ball to Fozzie, but the comedian bear got backhanded by Bupkus)
Bupkus: That's mine.
(He was about to catch the ball, but Kermit caught it with his tongue and passed it to Orchid)
Kermit: Not today.
BUPKUS: Hey.
(Orchid caught the ball and held it out)
BLANKO: Bring it on, dude.
(Orchid extended her leg and tripped the blue player)
ORCHID: Whoopsie-daisy.
(She passed the ball to Walter. Bang ran after him as Pound faced Walter. Pound chased towards him, gave an evil smile)
Pound: You're mine.
(He was about to grab him, but he tripped over as Walter stepped on his head, then he used her foot to get onto his behind and jumped into the air)
(Everything began to go in slow motion as Walter made the jump)
Orchid: Walt, I'm open!
(But Walter was about to make his way towards the hoop)
Orchid: Never mind.
(The Muppet Squad all looked excited when Walter was prepared to dunk the ball, but Bang and Bupkus jumped up and grabbed her by her waist, and pulled to keep her away and stop her from scoring! However, Walter remembered what Kermit told him about Disney and Muppet Physics. He stretched his arm out and it became really long. Bang and Bupkus tried to slow her down even more, but he dunked the ball into the hoop as the time buzzed)
(Walter held on to the hoop and heard everyone in the stadium erupt with loud cheers. Swackhammer's eyes popped out when he saw the scoreboard. The Muppets (Gonzo, Floyd, Dr. Teeth, Pepé) cheered, Kermit and Piggy embraced, and Orchid shouted with joy. Walter looked at the scoreboard, and it read that the Muppets have beaten the MonStars 78-77; they won the Ultimate Game! Walter let go of the hoop and ran towards his teammates with open arms)
Louis Kazagger: The Muppets win!
(Everyone began to cheer for Kermit, Walter, Orchid, Fozzie, and Piggy as they ran over to their teammates (Gonzo, Rowlf, Floyd, Janice, Dr. Teeth, Beauregard, Pepé, Zoot, Scooter, Lew Zealand, Beaker) and gave high-fives, a group hug, and many thanks to her. During their victory celebration, Janice went and kissed a confused Sam)
Walter: (to Orchid) That was a nice pass.
Orchid: That was a great stretch for the basket too.
Walter: You know, you really got some skills. You might be able to play in the NBA.
Orchid: Thanks, Walt. I'll probably quote you on that. But I'm gonna take this opportunity to retire from the game.
Walter: No, come on.
Orchid: No. No, I'm gonna retire right now. That's all there is to it. I'm going to come up undefeated, untied. That's the way it's gonna be. You go celebrate with your team.
Walter: Come help us.
Orchid: I'd like to, but I have to rest, okay? They're starting to go.
Walter: All right. Goodbye.
Orchid: All right, see you.
Walter: Are you sure?
Orchid: Yeah. Definitely sure. Definitely.
(As Orchid left the court, Kermit, Walter, Fozzie, and Piggy turned their attention to Swackhammer and the MonStars. He was berating them for losing)
Swackhammer: Losers.
MONSTARS: Sorry.
Swackhammer: Choke artists.
MonStars: Sorry again.
Swackhammer: Wait till I get you back on Moron Mountain.
(He stomped on Bupkus' foot, causing him to howl in pain and hold his sore foot. He turned his attention to the Muppet Squad (Kermit, Fozzie, Gonzo, Scooter))
Swackhammer: All right. The party's over. Get in the spaceship.
Walter: Why do you take it from this guy?
(Bupkus answered in a scared tone)
Bupkus: Because he's bigger.
MonStars: (even Pound) He's bigger?
Bang: Than we used to be.
(Suddenly, the MonStars realized that they should be the ones to get respect, and they all turned their attention towards Swackhammer and growled: "Wait a minute." Swackhammer noticed that something was not going right)
Swackhammer: What are you doing?
(The MonStars surrounded Swackhammer, and grabbed him. Bupkus, Bang, and Nawt dragged him to the center of the court)
Swackhammer: Wait. What are you doing? Wait.
POUND: Come here.
(The Muppet Squad watched, and could not believe that the MonStars were being the good guys. The MonStars shoved Mr. Swackhammer into a rocket that Dr. Bunsen Honeydew and Beaker had earlier. Swackhammer was finally getting his comeuppance and the MonStars have gotten what they deserved after all of these years: respect and freedom. Kermit and Beaker grinned as the MonStars lit the fuse and Swackhammer was blasted away with the MonStars waving goodbye. As Swackhammer crashed through the ceiling, he flew all the way to the moon, never to be seen)
(The Muppet Squad and the audience cheered)
Walter: Had it in you all the time, didn't you?
(The MonStars all gave warm smiles, and shrugs to them as Walter remembered the deal)
Walter: One thing, though. Pass me the ball, Kermit.
(Kermit passed Walter the ball)
Walter: You gotta give my friends their talent back.
(The MonStars almost forgot)
Pound: Do we have to?
(Walter calmly nodded her head)
Walter: Yeah, it's part of the deal. Touch the ball.
Bupkus: Oh, okay.
(Bupkus reached his hand for the ball, and placed his hand on it. Bang, Blanko, Pound, and Nawt followed his example)
BLANKO: Fair is fair.
Walter: There you go. Touch it.
(The ball began to glow)
(The MonStars began to shake, the shaking stopped, and they shrank back to being Nerdlucks. They popped out of their clothes)
Bupkus: That was so much fun.
Bang: I feel so insignificant.
(Pound held his jersey in his small hands)
Pound: My clothes don't fit.
Nawt: (rubbing his head) What a trip.
Blanko: Ha, ha. I'm up for another one.
Pound: Could we ask you a favor, Mr. Froggy? We don't want to go back to Moron Mountain.
Bang: We hate it up there.
Nawt: (giving a thumbs-down) It stinks.
Blanko: Um, I was thinking, could we stay here with you?
(The Nerdlucks all gave big grins and puppy dog eyes)
Nerdlucks (All): (big grins and puppy dog eyes) Please.
(However, Gonzo did resist the cute faces)
Gonzo: Oh, brother.
(Kermit decided to give them some motivation)
Kermit: Eh, I don't know if those guys are Muppety enough.
Bang: Muppety enough?
(A curtain opened and the Nerdlucks dressed up as the Muppet characters (Blanko as Gonzo, Bupkus as Scooter, Nawt as Dr. Teeth, Bang as Floyd, and Pound as Kermit), and danced, sang, and ended the show with an explosion)
(Tulip ran to the court)
Tulip: Walter, do you know what time it is?
Scooter: Seven-fift... Seven-fift... Quarter past 7.
Tulip: Exactly. You've got a baseball game in five minutes.
Walter: Okay. Take this.
(He gave Tulip the basketball. Tulip put the basketball in the gym bag)
Tulip: Is it safe?
Walter: Yeah, put it in my bag.
Tulip: Okay. Let's go.
(Walter looked at the Muppet Squad (Bunsen, Scooter, Floyd, Pepé, Gonzo, Fozzie, Janice, Kermit, Dr. Teeth, Piggy))
Walter: I really enjoyed playing with you guys. You guys got a lot of, uh... A lot of, uh...
MUPPETS: Yes?
Walter: Well, whatever it is, you got a lot of it.
(The Muppets all smiled and said thanks, while the Nerdlucks offered to use their spaceship to escort Tulip and Walter to Los Angeles)
(Before Walter left Muppet Land, he turned back to Kermit)
Walter: Kermit?
Kermit: Eh, Walt?
Walter: Stay out of trouble.
(Walter and Tulip left Muppet Land)
Kermit: You know I will.
(He looked at Piggy)
Kermit: Come here!
(Kermit gave Piggy a big kiss, making her go Muppet as she 'Woo-Hoo'd' all over the arena)
(EXT. BASEBALL FIELD — NIGHT. Everyone was waiting for Walter to arrive, so the game could begin. It was a pretty long delay and everyone was getting impatient. One person was looking at his watch)
Crowd: (CHANTING) We want Walter! We want Walter!
Person: The delay is killing us. Where's Walter?
Rosie: Where is Walter?
Mike: Oh, she's not back from his other game.
Rosie: What other game?
Jodi: Shh.
Rosie: Uh-uh. What other game?
(Suddenly, the Nerdlucks' spaceship at the baseball stadium and landed at the center of the field. The players all gathered to the diamond to see what was going on as everyone stood up to see if Walter has arrived. As the door of the spaceship opened, Tulip stepped out of it as she held a megaphone)
Tulip: Ladies and gentlemen, Walter Jordan.
(Walter stepped out of the Nerdlucks' spaceship in her Dodgers baseball uniform, waving her hat to everyone as everyone at the stadium cheered for the superstar and her cousin gave her a thumbs up)
(EXT. ANAHEIM — NIGHT. The fairies searched high and low throughout Anaheim. They found Lost a things everywhere, and they brought them all back to Tinker Bell for inspection)
(Tink pored over each and every one. A fork. A spoon. A hinge. A mousetrap. A fishing lure. An antique fountain pen. An old leather glove. And a strange apparatus that one of the music fairies told them was called a harmonica)
Tinker Bell: Okay, what have you got?
Fairy 1: How about this?
Fairy 2: Will this do?
Clank: Can you use this fuzzy thing, Miss Bell?
Tinker Bell: Oh, yeah!
BOBBLE: It's not fuzzy.
CLANK: Yes, it is.
Bobble: No, it isn't.
(It wasn't long before Tink had figured out how to make a huge berry/nut squasher. The other fairies gathered around, eager to help her construct it)
Tinker Bell: Twig.
(She holds out her hand like a surgeon demanding a scalpel)
(A nature fairy placed a twig in her waiting palm. Tink attached it to the acorn and held out her hand again)
Tinker Bell: Hammer.
(A tinker fairy hurried to give her one. Tink used it to tap the twig into place)
Tinker Bell: Magnification, please. Thank you.
(A light fairy held a pair of eyeglasses in front of the apparatus so that Tink could see it nice and big through the lenses)
Tinker Bell: And that's how you do it!
(At the beach, Bobble and Clank found a perfume bottle)
Bobble: Now, what do you suppose the…
(Bobble blows through the sprayer, playing a melody. Clank squeezes the rubber bulb, making Bobble fill himself up and shot backwards. Bobble coughed up perfume)
Clank: You smell funny.
(Abruptly, they saw what Bobble hit. It was the music box with the ballerina on top)
Clank: I saw it first.
Bobble: I bumped into it.
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – NIGHT. Tinker Bell attached the perfume bottle to the thumb of the glove)
TINKER BELL: Just tie this off here. So, you just squeeze this, then let it go, and…
(She used the rubber bulb on the perfume bottle to suck air out of the glove. That, in turn, sucked in the seeds that had been lying near the cut-off fingers)
(As the glove refilled with air, the seeds were spit out through the harmonica and into waiting baskets)
(The contraption was noisy, but it did the job. Soon a team of fairies was flying along with the device, which was busily honking and huffing and picking up seeds)
Tinker Bell: See? Simple!
(Minutes later, they had a machine with a dozen berry/nut squashers in a row)
Tinker Bell: Now, just put the berries in, and we'll have plenty of paint in no time!
(The berry-picking fairies dumped berries into the squashers, turned the wheel, and cheered when a dozen buckets filled up with paint)
(Tink was thrilled. Supplies were piling up so fast, the bird carriers could hardly keep up. The Minister of Spring went through leaf scroll after leaf scroll as he listed the inventory)
(Tink spread her wings and flew up to get an aerial view of their progress. Her heart swelled. There were baskets, buckets, and bugsas far as the eye could see)
(She cast an anxious glance at the Everblossom. Would they have enough supplies to deliver spring to the mainland by the time the flower opened?)
(Tink hurried back down to help. Time was of the essence. Every second counted. So did every seed. And so did every fairy)
(INT. LOCAL GYM — NIGHT. The NBA stars were still depressed about losing their skills, and found nothing about what happened to them in recent games)
Charles: Guys, we suck.
Larry: Yeah, man. My grandmother plays better than I do.
Muggsy: At least you guys are still tall. Me, I'm nothing now. Just another short guy.
Charles: You got that right. That's the only thing you got right.
(Later, the doors of the gym opened, and Tulip and Walter walked inside with the basketball that held in the basketball players' talents)
Patrick: Who's that?
Charles: Who's that?
SHAWN: I don't know.
Walter: Been getting your butt kicked?
MUGGSY: Who's that?
Charles: It's Walter Jordan.
Muggsy: What's up?
Charles: Why are you here?
Walter: Don't be embarrassed. Just face it. You guys stink.
Larry: Come on, Walt. Lighten up.
Walter: I know. You want your games back, huh? What little games you had to begin with.
Shawn: It's hard enough as it is, Tink.
Charles: Give us a break.
Walter: I'm gonna regret this. Tulip, give me the ball.
(Tulip zipped the bag, and held up the glowing basketball that held the NBA players' talents. Charles Barkley, Patrick Ewing, Muggsy Bogues, Larry Johnson, and Shawn Bradley were all shocked)
Players (All): Oh.
Muggsy: Looks like something from Star Trek.
Walter: Touch it.
Shawn: No way, Jose.
Walter: Pat, you want your talent back? You don't have any choice. Just touch it.
Patrick: I don't know.
Walter: Okay, you're gonna walk around with a bad game for the rest of your career. Touch the ball.
Shawn: Careful, Pat. We've tried everything else.
(They were all hesitant, and tried to tell him not to do it, but Patrick Ewing reached his hand for the ball, and touched it)
Walter: Come on, Charles. Touch it. The rest of you guys. Just touch it.
(Charles Barkley did the same thing, and the other players followed his example)
(As the five players had their hands on the ball, the ball shimmered, and the players started shaking. The shaking stopped, and they gained composure. Walter passed the ball to Muggsy Bogues, and he caught it with ease)
Muggsy: Hey, I caught it.
(He dribbled the ball)
SHAWN: Look at Muggsy handle the rock.
LARRY: Handle it, baby.
Muggsy: I can handle that rock again.
(Then passed it to Larry Johnson)
LARRY: That's the old Muggs I know.
PATRICK: Yeah, get height now.
(He dribbled it to the hoops, and dunked it)
Larry: It gave me my powers back.
(Charles Barkley received the ball, and dunked the ball in with ease. Later, Patrick Ewing and Shawn Bradley did the same thing. Walter and Tulip all watched them, and smiled)
PATRICK: Oh, man. That felt good.
SHAWN: I got it.
MUGGSY: You got it. Yeah, baby.
(They were about to leave, but Charles Barkley stopped them)
Charles: Hey, Walt. Why don't you stay, play some three-on-three with us?
Walter: No, I don't think so.
Charles: You gonna work on that baseball swing?
Patrick: Leave the baseball player alone. He doesn't play basketball anymore.
Shawn: She probably doesn't have it anymore, guys.
Tulip: Walt, you hear them? They don't think you can play the game anymore.
(Walter looked at the players, who gave her looks of interest and shrugs)
Walter: There's only one way to find out.
(INT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — NIGHT. A thousand small lights helped lay Ray to rest that night in the bayou. Louis played softly as fireflies from all over came to pay their respects. Tiana and Naveen were there, too, when the clouds parted and starlight sparkled in the sky)
(Everyone looked up. There in the sky, the Evening Star, Ray's Evangeline, was shining brightly. And right beside her was a new star no one had ever seen before. A huge grin came over Louis' tear-stained face. Tiana and Naveen held each other close. Ray and his Evangeline were together at last)
(EXT. SPRINGTIME SQUARE – DAWN. By dawn, the fairies were exhausted but hopeful. Never in the entire history of Anaheim had so much work been completed so quickly)
(Garden fairies gathered up baskets of seeds and buckets of berry paint. Animal fairies saddled up birds. Flower bulbs and ladybugs piled into their containers)
Rosetta: Six, seven and eight.
(Tink looked up and saw Clarion arriving just as the light from the rising sun began to illuminate the Everblossom)
(Magically, the petals of the Everblossom opened and lit Springtime Square with a soft golden glow)
(The fairies cheered as the Queen landed and looked around the square with pride)
(Her eyes missed nothing, and when they fell on Tinker Bell's face, she stretched out her hand)
Clarion: You did it, Tinker Bell. You saved spring.
Tinker Bell: We all did it.
(Tinker Bell's friends rushed to hug her)
Silvermist: (sweetly) Queen Clarion? Can't Tink come with us to the mainland?
Fawn: Yeah, she's done so much for everyone.
(Tinker Bell shook her head)
Tinker Bell: No, no, you guys, really. I don't need to go.
(Rosetta fluttered her lashes in confusion)
Rosetta: Buttercup, it's what you wanted.
Tinker Bell: It's okay. My work is here. And I still have so much to do. I gotta…
FAIRY MARY: Not here, you don't!
(Fairy Mary came elbowing through the crowd with a very serious look on her face)
(Tink gulped. How had she managed to get herself in trouble again?)
Tinker Bell: Well… But I don't…
(Fairy Mary turned her head and whistled)
(At her signal, Clank and Bobble led Cheese and the wagon into the middle of the square. Sitting in the back was the beautiful music box)
(Tinker Bell's mouth fell open in surprise)
(Someone had finished cleaning the box, and it sparkled like a jewel)
(Bobble's eyes goggled happily)
Bobble: Surprise, Miss Bell.
Clank: We found your tiny dancer!
(Fairy Mary came to stand beside Tink)
Fairy Mary: Actually, I ran across this myself many seasons ago. I didn't have a clue what it was or how to fix it. But you did, Tinker Bell. You are quite a rare talent indeed.
(Tink beamed, feeling embarrassed and pleases at the same time)
Fairy Mary: And I'd imagine there's a little girl out there who's missing this.
(Tinker Bell looked up)
Tinker Bell: What do you mean? How…
(Clarion and Fairy Mary exchanged a sly look)
Fairy Mary: I think that perhaps a certain tinker fairy might have a job to do after all, on the mainland.
(Tinker Bell's heart filled with joy)
Tinker Bell: You mean, I…
(The queen nodded)
(Tinker Bell was so happy she wanted to dart into the air and turn somersaults. The mainland! She, Tinker Bell, was going to the mainland to help deliver spring. Her wings trembled with emotion. What an honor!)
(Her friends cheered)
IRIDESSA: I knew you'd get to go!
FAWN: Oh, Tink!
Clank: We can help, Miss Bell.
Bobble: We can help. I'm strong.
Iridessa: I'm so happy for you. Come on. We gotta go line up.
(But suddenly Tinker Bell felt a stab of worry. She turned to the queen)
Tinker Bell: Thank you, Your Highness. But how will I find who it belongs to?
Clarion: You'll know.
(Clarion assured Tink, just as she had assured her on the day she had arrived)
Clarion: Now go!
(Her voice was kind, but Tinker Bell recognized that she–and everyone else–had just been given a command)
(Springtime Square erupted as the fairies snapped into action)
(Tinker Bell, bowed to the queen and hurried to do as she was ordered)
(But then she stopped. There was one last thing she had to do. She threw her arms around Fairy Mary and gave her a huge hug)
Fairy Mary: Good heavens.
Tinker Bell: Thank you.
(She turned and started to fly away again, but Terence ran up and stopped her)
Terence: Tink. Hey, something to help you on the mainland.
(He put a tiny leaf package in her hand)
Tinker Bell: Terence, that's so sweet.
Terence: Good luck, Tink.
Spring: (to the doves and fairies) To the air, fairies! To the air! The mainland awaits!
(At that moment, Tink's friends swept her into the air. It was time to go. Time to fly. There was not a moment to lose)
NARRATOR: (SINGING) Come away with me now to the sky
Up over the hills and the sea
(Tink watched Clank and Bobble struggle to lift the music box)
Narrator: Far beyond where our memories lie
To a place where I'm free to be me
(Clarion knew just what to do. She flew by and playfully sprinkled Bobble, Clank, and the music box with some extra pixie dust)
(VOOOM!)
(Up into the air they flew, carrying the music box–and thrilled to be joining the nature fairies and Tinker Bell on this great adventure. They knew that this was going to be a special spring indeed)
Narrator: Oh gather ye now one and all
No matter what all ye may do
Let the stars fill your soul when the moon cradles all
So to yourself be true
The blanket of snow is all gone
Each flower waits for the sun
And the whispering tears of the rain
Holds promise for everyone
(EXT. LONDON – NIGHT. On the mainland, in the city of London, Kensington Gardens wore the last days of winter like a shabby old coat)
(But it wouldn't have to endure the cold much longer. Up in the sky, a magical procession was approaching)
(Light fairies, animal fairies, garden fairies, water fairies, flower fairies, painting fairies, planting fairies, and–for the first time–tinker fairies flew overhead in sparkling clouds and singing clusters)
Narrator: Then come away with me friends
No matter where you call your home
With a light in our hearts we will never part
No matter how far we roam
(The Minister of Spring pointed over the London)
Spring: Fairies to the north! Fairies to the south! To the east and west!
(Fairies fanned out in every direction, doing what they did best)
(Tinker Bell swiftly followed a group down into Kensington Gardens and watched as her fellow fairies performed tiny miracles. A light fairy directed the sun's rays and melted away the last bit of frost that was still clinging to a branch)
(A water fairy used pixie dust to clean up the cloudy water of a pond)
Narrator: Deep in the forest we go
The creatures are all fast asleep
(Animal fairies gently woke sleeping squirrels)
Fawn: Wake up, sleepyheads! Come on! There you go. Good squirrel.
(Tinker Bell flew up high so that she could watch. The garden fairies hurried well-behaved rows of marching flower bulbs and their beds. The bulbs planted themselves and waited while the water fairies sprinkled them with rain)
Narrator: With a kiss and a wink we will waken our souls
While always their safety we'll keep
And then, then we'll dance through the night
Till the sunbeams sparkle at dawn
And away we will go like last winter's snow
Soon our work will be done
Oh gather ye now one and all
No matter what all ye may do
Let the stars fill your soul when the moon cradles all
So to yourself be true
(Trees bloomed)
(Baby birds took to the air)
(Rainbow shot across the sky in every direction)
(The grubby gray winter coat was gone now, replaced with the gorgeous garments of spring. Kensington Gardens seemed to explode with life and color like a kaleidoscope)
(Tink was mesmerized by all she saw. It was more beautiful than she had ever imagined)
Narrator: Oh gather ye now one and all
No matter what all ye may do
Let the stars fill your soul when the moon cradles all
So to yourself be true
(Just then, she heard a whistle and saw Clank and Bobble waving at her, reminding her that she had a job to do)
Narrator: So to yourself be true
(She tried to take the music box from them, but it was too heavy to carry by herself. Tink remembered that she had Terence's gift in her pocket)
(She opened the little package and smiled. Extra pixie dust!)
(Tinker Bell sprinkled some dust on the music box and held the box by the ballerina's hand)
(EXT. BLOOMSBURY – NIGHT. By twilight, Tinker Bell was exhausted. She hadn't found the owner of the music box)
(Clarion had said Tink would know whose it was. But how?)
(Suddenly, as Tink flew past a window, the music began to glow)
(She fluttered back and hovered just outside the window. The music box glowed even more brightly. This had to be it)
(Tinker Bell gently set the music box down on the windowsill and peered through the glass. There were toys and lovely, shiny things everywhere)
(A door inside the house opened. Someone was coming. Quick as lightning, Tinker Bell placed the music box on the windowsill. Then she tapped on the glass and ducked behind a nearby chimney, where she could watch without being seen)
(A little girl, whose goes by her name: WENDY DARLING ran to the window and opened it. When she saw the music box, her eyes lit up)
(She lifted the box happily, as if it were a long-lost friend. Then Wendy pulled out a small key on a chain around her neck. She put the key into the music box and turned it)
(Tink moved closer to the window, eager to see what Wendy was doing)
(Wonder of wonders, once the key was turned, the music box began to play all on its own)
(Wendy cradled the box in her arms and listened as if it were the most beautiful sound in the world (You Can Fly, You Can Fly, You Can Fly!" from Walt Disney's 1953 animated classic, Peter Pan))
(Tinker Bell watched with satisfaction and giggled)
(Wendy heard the laugh and looked up)
(Tinker Bell quickly darted back out of sight, her heart pounding. Eventually, Wendy turned away)
Wendy: (GIGGLING) Mummy! Guess what, guess what!
MRS. DARLING: Yes, Wendy. What is it, darling?
(Tinker Bell smiled at a job well done. She opened her wings and took to the air, soaring into the golden sunset where Iridessa, Fawn, Silvermist, and Rosetta were waiting)
(Their work here was done)
(It was time to go home)
NARRATOR: A fairy's work is much more than, at first, it might appear. Suppose your broken clock ticks, though it hasn't in a year.
(The faint sound of laughter)
Narrator: Perchance you find a toy you lost, or jingling bells you hear. It all means that one very special fairy might be near.
(INT. BAYOU, CALIFORNIA — DAY. When we flew back to Anaheim, all the creatures of the bayou gathered for the wedding of Tiana and her frog prince. The bride wore a lovely leaf on her head as she sat on a stage next to her adoring groom. Mama Odie presided over the ceremony)
Mama Odie: And so by the power vested in me, (CHUCKLES) I now pronounce y'all frog and wife. Get to it, Hop-along! Give your lovely bride some sugar!
BUTTERFLY: Congratulations.
(Prince Naveen kissed Tiana and–POOF!–they disappeared in a swirl of sparkling green pixie dust)
Mama Odie: (CHUCKLING IN DELIGHT) This going to be good!
(When the air cleared, Tiana and Prince Naveen looked at each other in amazement)
(Tiana was wearing a shimmering green wedding dress with a crown of flowers in her hair, and Prince Naveen looked dashing in a royal vest and sash. They were both human again!)
Mama Odie: Like I told y'all, kissing a princess breaks the spell.
Naveen: Once you became my wife, that made you...
Tiana: A princess. You just kissed yourself a princess.
Naveen: And I'm about to do it again.
(The crowd cheered)
(INT. CATHEDRAL — DAY. The official royal wedding was held. This time, the guests were all citizens, including the Muppets, the Nerdlucks, Charlotte, Big Daddy, and the King and Queen of Mississippi)
(EXT. CATHEDRAL — DAY. Eudora watched as her daughter walked down the aisle in the most beautiful wedding gown Anaheim had ever seen)
(Princess Tiana and Prince Naveen exited the cathedral through a grand battalion of saluting Maldonian guards. The happy couple stepped into a horse-drawn carriage as Tink threw her bouquet into the crowd)
(Charlotte, of course, caught it)
(EXT. ANAHEIM — DAY. Tiana and her friends, including the Nerdlucks, Walter, the Muppets, and her friends of Pixie Anaheim, purchased the cottage the next day. Then, over the months, she and Naveen worked hard to transform it into the glamorous restaurant of her dreams)
(INT. TIANA'S PALACE — NIGHT. Tiana perfected every delicious recipe, from the spicy gumbo to the fresh beignets. And if that weren't enough, the restaurant had a stage with a band that featured Dr. Teeth and the Electric Mayhem and Louis, the only trumpet-playing alligator in the city)
(That night at Tiana's restaurant, the new princess happily greeted her first guests. Then she approached the table where Eudora was seated with the King and Queen of Maldonia. Eudora was beaming with pride and love. So were Naveen's parents)
Tiana: (SINGING) Look at the world – so close, and I'm halfway to it!
Look at it all – so big – do I even dare?
Look at me – there at last – I just have to do it
Should I?
No.
Here I go...
Just smell the beignets! The gumbo! Just like I dreamed they'd be!
Just hear the music beat–the way it's calling me
For like the first time ever, I'm completely free!
(Charlotte eagerly took the dance floor with the young prince)
Charlotte: Who would have thought the prince would've had a younger brother! How old did you say you were?
Young Prince: I'm six and a half.
(Charlotte thought for a moment, and then shrugged her shoulders happily)
Charlotte: Well, I've waited this long.
(And she was willing to wait a few more years to marry the prince)
Tiana: I could go running
And racing
And dancing
And chasing
And leaping
And bounding
Hair flying
Heart pounding
And splashing
And reeling
And finally feeling
Now's when my life begins!
(Tiana turned to Prince Naveen and held out her hand to dance. The prince smiled and waltzed her up to the rooftop. Pixie dust swirled around them. Prince Naveen and Princess Tiana danced on top of Anaheim's finest new restaurant aptly named Tiana's Palace. Tiana's dream of owning a restaurant had finally come true. But now she had even more: She had everything she need–the love of family and friends. And it had all happened because she had remembered what was important, just as her father had said so many years before)
BIG BIRD: OK, move along. There's nothing else to see at Sesame Street. Hmm.
(He takes off the hat. Who's wearing that Goofy costume? It's BIG BIRD)
Big Bird: I like the sound of that. Just sing...
(The closing circle is crushing his neck. He tries to move. But it wouldn't budge. Tinker Bell waves the wand that marks the words "The End")
(THE END)

cast
mae whitman – tinker bell
bruno campos – prince naveen
kristin chenoweth – rosetta
keith david – dr. facilier
raven-symoné – iridessa
danny devito – mr. swackhammer
lucy liu – silvermist
michael-leon wooley – louis
america ferrera – fawn
miley cyrus – tulip
steve whitmire – kermit, beaker, statler, rizzo, bean bunny, link hogthrob, newsman
eric jacobson – miss piggy, fozzie bear, animal, sam eagle, marvin suggs
dave goelz – gonzo, dr. bunsen honeydew, zoot, beauregard, waldorf
bill barretta – rowlf, dr. teeth, pepé the prawn, swedish chef, bobo
david rudman – scooter, janice, wayne
matt vogel – sgt. floyd pepper, camilla, sweetums, lew zealand, masterson the rat, louis kazagger, bull, crazy harry
peter linz – walter
jennifer cody – charlotte
jane horrocks – fairy mary
jesse mccartney – terence
jim cummings – ray
jeff bennett – clank, del harris
rob paulsen – bobble
peter bartlett – lawrence
pamela adlon – vidia
jenifer lewis – mama odie, housekeeper
anjelica huston – queen clarion
lauren graham – eudora
john krasinski – james
john goodman – big daddy labouff
grey delisle – orchid
kari wahlgren – daisy
jocelyn blue – nerdluck pound
charity james – nerdluck blanko
june melby – nerdluck bang
catherine reitman – nerdluck bupkus
colleen wainwright – nerdluck nawt
dorian harewood – monstar bupkus
joey camen – monstar bang
t.k. carter – monstar nawt
darnell suttles – monstar pound
steve kehela – monstar blanko
loreena mckennitt – narrator
steve valentine – minister of spring
kathy najimy – minister of summer
richard portnow – minister of autumn
gail borges – minister of winter
bonnie hunt – aunt rosie
raymond ochoa – mike
matthew josten – mark
sammi hanratty – jodi
charles barkley – himself
patrick ewing – himself
muggsy bogues – himself
larry johnson – himself
shawn bradley – himself
ava acres – young tink
breanna brooks – young charlotte
ritchie montgomery – reggie
don hall – darnell
paul briggs – two fingers
michael colyar – buford
emeril lagasse – marlon the gator
kevin michael richardson – ian the gator
randy newman – cousin randy
america young – wendy darling
kat cressida – mrs. darling
ahmad rashad – ahmad rashad
daran norris – vlade divac
john dimaggio – cedric ceballos
corey burton – jim rome
nolan north – paul westphal
brian stepanek – danny ainge
roger craig smith – alonzo mourning
danielle mone truitt – georgia
additional muppet performers: tyler bunch, bruce lanoil, michelan sisti, paul mcginnis, greg ballora, david barclay, tim blaney, kevin carlson, leslie carrara-rudolph, kristin charney, nathan danforth, alice dinnean, julia gunn, bj guyer, tanya haden, patrick johnson, sean johnson, len levitt, james murray, michael oosterom, karen prell, mike quinn, david skelly, andy stone, art gonzalez vega, alex villa, chase woolner
and
caroll spinney as big bird
additional voices: lori alan, stephen j. anderson, carlos alazraqui, jack angel, michael bell, bob bergen, susanne blakeslee, kwesi boakye, christin ciaccio briggs, marsha clark, roy conli, john cygan, peter del vecho, debi derryberry, jessica dicicco, lino disalvo, jeff draheim, rob edwards, jessica evans, bill farmer, sandy fox, andy fischer-price, pat fraley, crispin freeman, teresa ganzel, nathan greno, jennifer hale, jess harnell, kelly hoover, byron howard, forrest iwaszewski, josh keaton, phil lamarr, nicolette little, sherry lynn, danny mann, j.p. manoux, jason marsden, mona marshall, dara mcgarry, mickie mcgowan, alec medlock, tim mertens, laraine newman, shannon o'connor, colleen o'shaughnessey, phil proctor, cristina pucelli, jan rabson, aurian redson, karen ann ryan, lorry ann shea, tara strong, elissa sussman, shane sweet, erik von detten, hynden walch, james kevin ward, marlon west, colette whitaker, joe whyte, chris williams, april winchell, mick wingert

(POST-CREDITS SCENE)
(Kermit pulls the credits screen off)
Kermit: Well, we'll see you in 2013 for our sequel!
Scooter: You're doing the Muppet Show closing theme! We'll see...
Gonzo: Step aside, Babe! Let a star do this! We'll see you...
(Gonzo, however, was interrupted as the Nerdlucks pushed him out of the "O" of The Muppet Show sign)
Nerdlucks: We'll see you next time on the next movie.
(Walter pulls the screen up)
Walter: Can I go home now?
(He pulls the screen back down as Statler and Waldorf appeared)
Waldorf: Uh, Statler?
Statler: Yeah? What?
Waldorf: Is that it?
Statler: Yes, it's over. How did you like it?
Waldorf: I don't know. I slept through the whole thing.
Statler: Oh, I hope you didn't miss much.
(Then Zoot appeared and blows a final bum note out of his saxophone)

(Walt Disney Animation Studios logo: The shorter version. The closing variant is silent)
(Walt Disney Pictures logo: The short version of the CGI castle)